The Official TP Funnies thread ( Jokes Memes etc )

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In theory, airliners could be crewed by one person and a dog. The person is there to reassure the passengers while the dog is there to bite the person should they go near the controls.
 
Nod said:
In theory, airliners could be crewed by one person and a dog. The person is there to reassure the passengers while the dog is there to bite the person should they go near the controls.
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Reminds me of the old monkey/astronaut joke...

Did you hear about the monkey they sent into space with an astronaut? The rocket launched and immediately the monkey was busy on his phone receiving instructions from Ground Control concerning the position, velocity, and guidance of the vehicle in order to make corrections. Then, when they reached orbit the monkey’s phone went dead and the astronaut’s phone rang.
“Ah, finally, something important!” the astronaut exclaimed. “Don’t forget to feed the monkey,” Ground Control reminded him.
 
welshwizard645 said:
And someone cloned out Lord Lucan who was definitely riding the Unicorn at the time
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WAS he had just been beamed up by the flying saucer .. and is now a prisoner of captain heinz and his crewman h.p
 
Nah! Yer all wrong. It's an illusion caused by insufficient alcohol in your blood.

Anyway, that type of flying saucer hasn't been in use since the Roswell cockup. Failed it's 200 light year safety check...
 
hot round here, today!
 
"TAXI !!!"
 
Used to love sliding down banister rails but that one's probably a bit steep and long...
 
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