The Official TP Funnies thread ( Jokes Memes etc )

A Patient escaped from locked-ward hospital, ran off down the street, and decided to try and find some street clothes.

He dived into a laundrette and whilst there, sexually assaulted two staff before running off.

Headine in local Paper the following day was....


Nut Screws Washers and Bolts.
 
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A few places around here won’t take 50’s, my source in a bank tells me there's a bigger percentage of fake 20’s than 50’s, £100’s cause even more strife!
 
FWIW, even in Scotland, Scottish notes aren't "Legal Tender".
 
In the UK, people drive on the left of the road.




Sorry.
In the UK, people drive on WHAT'S left of the road...
 
An ex of mine asked me to give her 10 reasons why I was going out with her.

"Your personalities." wasn't the answer she was looking for.
 
Nod said:
FWIW, even in Scotland, Scottish notes aren't "Legal Tender".
Click to expand...
And nor are English ones - at least none that are in current circulation - Bank of England, with a face value below £5 (ie. A £4.99 note would be...)
 
hunnymonster said:
And nor are English ones - at least none that are in current circulation - Bank of England, with a face value below £5 (ie. A £4.99 note would be...)
Click to expand...


Bank of England notes are legal tender in England and Wales but not in Scotland or Northern Ireland.
www.bankofengland.co.uk

What is legal tender?

Many people are confused about this – it is more about settling debts than how you pay for things in shops
www.bankofengland.co.uk www.bankofengland.co.uk
 
misconduct.jpg
 
Only had a printer scratch me once.
 
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