The Official TP Funnies thread ( Jokes Memes etc )

I find it very humorous , topical humor and pretty near the truth as well ..each to there own
 
Mag1cp2x said:
THIS IS HOW THE SACKING WENT DOWN!
Good morning Mandy, now as you know I was head of the CPS.
I hid Jimmy's crimes for decades and then Charlie boy asked me to cover for his brother while his mom was still hanging around the gaff and then there was that big f*** up in Rotherham mate and at this point we're looking like the Mitchell brothers in the queen Vic on new year's eve with a body on the pub floor and no obvious weapon.
So ive had a word with my mate Hermer and he's told me he's got a few snouts on the inside who can guarantee you that if I sling enough s*** at ya ill get off scotfree and you won't be doing any bird! But you might have to be someone's bird on the inside for a few month's....sorry my inner cockney escaped for a second
Anyway, Charlie boy has all that s*** going on with Randy Andy so they'll all forget about Manky Mandy in a few weeks so all good.
Quiet word in your ear too... burn those pictures you've got of me before I slag you off in parliament this afternoon or ill have to epstien you in Wandsworth.
Ping sends his love and Vlad asked if you took his boys c&@£ring with ya .... that was a Christmas present and he wants it back.
Don't call me back ffs mate.
Click to expand...
What!
 
A naval officer and a rating were having their hair cut in a barber's shop at the same time. When the one cutting the officer's hair finished, he asked if he would like it sprayed. The officer replied "Good God, man, of course not, my wife will think I've visited a brothel."

Almost immediately the second barber finished the rating's haircut and asked the same question. The rating replied "Spray away mate, my wife doesn't know what a brothel smells like."
 
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proctologists.jpg

Default specialist for all politicians...
 
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Default password being "Ger0nimO#"?
 
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