ancient_mariner
Moderator
- Messages
- 27,780
- Name
- Toni
- Edit My Images
- No
and the site receives a small commission
The Official TP Funnies thread ( Jokes Memes etc )
- Thread starter Cobra
- Start date
G.K.Jnr.
Suspended / Banned
- Messages
- 34,213
- Name
- George.
- Edit My Images
- No
A man goes skydiving. After a fantastic free fall, he pulls the rip cord to open his parachute but nothing happens. He tries everything but can't get it open. Just then another man flies by him, going up. The skydiver yells, "Hey, you know anything about parachutes?" The man replies, "No, you know anything about dynamite?"
- Messages
- 2,707
- Name
- Roy
- Edit My Images
- No
My wife made me attend a seminar on erectile dysfunction yesterday. 
It was a total flop, nobody came.
It was a total flop, nobody came.
welshwizard645
Suspended / Banned
- Messages
- 3,496
- Name
- Peter
- Edit My Images
- No
The brochure for the 2CV6 was very interesting - we owned a 2CV6 Special - the fuel consumption figures were quoted as urban = x mpg, 56 mph = x mpg, 75 mph = doesn't go that fast...
D
Deleted member 68495
Guest
It's true, I checked it!!
welshwizard645
Suspended / Banned
- Messages
- 3,496
- Name
- Peter
- Edit My Images
- No
A new study claims that one in three people is unfaithful.
I just need to figure out, is it my wife or my girlfriend?
I just need to figure out, is it my wife or my girlfriend?
welshwizard645
Suspended / Banned
- Messages
- 3,496
- Name
- Peter
- Edit My Images
- No
Two old ladies were sitting in a doctor's waiting room.
Lady One: I've sat here so long, my bum's gone to sleep.
Lady Two: I know, I can hear it snoring.
Lady One: I've sat here so long, my bum's gone to sleep.
Lady Two: I know, I can hear it snoring.
JohnStewart
Suspended / Banned
- Messages
- 1,160
- Name
- John Stewart
- Edit My Images
- Yes
Box Brownie
Suspended / Banned
- Messages
- 17,645
- Edit My Images
- No
Yup, optimism over actuality!
Brendan Mulachy
Suspended / Banned
- Messages
- 2,139
- Name
- dave
- Edit My Images
- Yes
- Messages
- 49,339
- Name
- Nod (UK)
- Edit My Images
- Yes
- Messages
- 6,133
- Name
- Dave
- Edit My Images
- Yes
Reminds me of a joke from Tim Vine, I think. -
One in five people in the world are Chinese. There are five people in my family so it must be one of then. It could be my Mum or Dad, or my older brother, Colin or my other brother Ho Chan Chu, but I think its Colin.
Dave