Bobsyeruncle
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Me?
and the site receives a small commission
The Official TP Funnies thread ( Jokes Memes etc )
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Brendan Mulachy
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Brendan Mulachy
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Jelster
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A few years ago, I was at my mates house (an ardent Fulham fan) and this young lad in Man Utd shirt knocked on the door. Nick answered and said "Yes mate".
"I'm here for Jo (Joanne, his lovely daughter), we're going to the pictures."
"My daughter won't be seen with somebody in a Manure shirt, p*** off" and closed the door....
Brendan Mulachy
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Help needed, when i was a kid i used to watch an American comedy. It was set in a bar i think in Boston, i just can't think of the name if anyone can help, cheers.
Al1944
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saltireblue
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The old ones are still best (sometimes)...
A general is visiting sick troops in a military hospital. He stops at a bed.
"Number, rank, name, sickness and treatment"
"948533 Private Jones, Sir! Piles, Sir! Ointment applied with a brush, Sir!"
"Your ambition, private?"
"To get back to my unit asap and fight for King and country, Sir"
"Very good. Carry on"
He stops at another bed and repeats the question.
"348574 Corporal Peters, Sir! Syphilis, Sir! Ointment applied with a brush, Sir!"
"Your ambition, corporal?"
"To get back to my unit asap and fight for King and country, Sir"
"Very good. Carry on"
He stops at a third bed.
"Number, rank, name sickness and treatment"
"68934 Private Davies, Sir! Sores in the mouth, Sir! Ointment applied with a brush, Sir!"
"And what is your ambition, private?"
"Sir, to get the brush before the other two, Sir!!"
A general is visiting sick troops in a military hospital. He stops at a bed.
"Number, rank, name, sickness and treatment"
"948533 Private Jones, Sir! Piles, Sir! Ointment applied with a brush, Sir!"
"Your ambition, private?"
"To get back to my unit asap and fight for King and country, Sir"
"Very good. Carry on"
He stops at another bed and repeats the question.
"348574 Corporal Peters, Sir! Syphilis, Sir! Ointment applied with a brush, Sir!"
"Your ambition, corporal?"
"To get back to my unit asap and fight for King and country, Sir"
"Very good. Carry on"
He stops at a third bed.
"Number, rank, name sickness and treatment"
"68934 Private Davies, Sir! Sores in the mouth, Sir! Ointment applied with a brush, Sir!"
"And what is your ambition, private?"
"Sir, to get the brush before the other two, Sir!!"