The Official TP Funnies thread ( Jokes Memes etc )

At the end of a trial the judge asks the defendant if he has anything to say as a final statement.

The defendant says, 'You honour, as God is my judge and I am not guilty'

The judge replies, 'I must remind the defendant, that he is not, but I am, and you are'

Dave
 
Thanks to storm Arwen my wheelie bin has to go on a speed awareness course next week
 
Not sure this one has been on here...

What's the difference between Black Eyed Peas & Chick Peas?

The Black Eyed Peas can sing us a song, the Chick Peas can only hummus one...

(I'll get my coat).
 
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