and the site receives a small commission
The Official TP Funnies thread ( Jokes Memes etc )
- Thread starter Cobra
- Start date
- Messages
- 14,819
- Name
- Richard
- Edit My Images
- No
Ummm ... Birds?
- Messages
- 2,707
- Name
- Roy
- Edit My Images
- No
This just in: Vatican City scammed out of 1 million euros as their PaPal account hacked . . .
boyfalldown
Suspended / Banned
- Messages
- 17,486
- Name
- Hugh
- Edit My Images
- No
Brendan Mulachy
Suspended / Banned
- Messages
- 2,139
- Name
- dave
- Edit My Images
- Yes
my granddad fought hard in world war 2 and i am sure that he would of been so proud of what the Tories have done to Britain recently
mind you he was in the SS
mind you he was in the SS
- Messages
- 14,819
- Name
- Richard
- Edit My Images
- No
Just a “special effect” but one of those glass walkways did shatter recently
.
Bobsyeruncle
Suspended / Banned
- Messages
- 17,422
- Name
- Bob
- Edit My Images
- Yes
welshwizard645
Suspended / Banned
- Messages
- 3,496
- Name
- Peter
- Edit My Images
- No
- Messages
- 105,684
- Name
- The other Chris
- Edit My Images
- Yes
This is a genuine comment in the Grauniads Notes and Queries section, made me chuckle
My wife is hypersensitive to any noise I make during the night which prevents her getting off to sleep or wakes her up. This includes the sound of me breathing, turning over in bed, the audible drumming made by the pulse behind my ear, and the loud swooshing noise my blood makes as it flows around my body. I am also personally responsible for any seagulls landing on the roof then taking off again. But in the morning, two alarm clocks blaring simultaneously by her head at full volume doesn’t so much as invade her dreams, let alone rouse her sweet head from her pillow.
My wife is hypersensitive to any noise I make during the night which prevents her getting off to sleep or wakes her up. This includes the sound of me breathing, turning over in bed, the audible drumming made by the pulse behind my ear, and the loud swooshing noise my blood makes as it flows around my body. I am also personally responsible for any seagulls landing on the roof then taking off again. But in the morning, two alarm clocks blaring simultaneously by her head at full volume doesn’t so much as invade her dreams, let alone rouse her sweet head from her pillow.
Sky
Suspended / Banned
- Messages
- 4,244
- Name
- Trevor
- Edit My Images
- No
Three Surgeons were discussing their favourite type of patient.
The first said: 'I like accountants because when you open them up everything inside is numbered'.
The second said: 'I prefer electricians because their insides are colour coded'.
But the third insisted: 'MPs are the easiest to operate on. There are no guts, no heart, no backbone and the head and backside are interchangeable'.
The first said: 'I like accountants because when you open them up everything inside is numbered'.
The second said: 'I prefer electricians because their insides are colour coded'.
But the third insisted: 'MPs are the easiest to operate on. There are no guts, no heart, no backbone and the head and backside are interchangeable'.
cymruchris
Suspended / Banned
- Messages
- 2,921
- Name
- Chris
- Edit My Images
- Yes
Who’s looking forward to a holiday ?
