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Just off to fix Cat Stevens's caravan,
' awning has broken '
' awning has broken '
and help to keep the site free for all
The Official TP Funnies thread ( Jokes Memes etc )
- Thread starter Cobra
- Start date
boogie man
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Two old friends are talking after dinner while their wives are in the kitchen clearing up.
“You know, we went to a great new restaurant the other night. Fantastic food and it was really reasonably priced too”
“Really? What was it called?”
“Hmmm, Let me think. It’ll come to me in a minute. Oh wait……I got it. What do you call those flowers that have red flowers and thorns?”
“Errr, rose?”
“Yeah that’s it! Hey Rose…..what was the name of that restaurant we went to the other night?”
“You know, we went to a great new restaurant the other night. Fantastic food and it was really reasonably priced too”
“Really? What was it called?”
“Hmmm, Let me think. It’ll come to me in a minute. Oh wait……I got it. What do you call those flowers that have red flowers and thorns?”
“Errr, rose?”
“Yeah that’s it! Hey Rose…..what was the name of that restaurant we went to the other night?”
Brendan Mulachy
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ancient_mariner
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ancient_mariner
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Brendan Mulachy
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G.K.Jnr.
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A wife saw her husband weigh himself on the scale trying to pull in the stomach. The wife thought he was trying to reduce his weight on the scale. So she said, "You know, I don't think that will help you." The husband replies, "Of course it helps. It is the only way I can see the number on the scale."
An angry wife called her husband on phone: “Where the hell are you?”
Husband: “Darling, you remember that jewellery shop where you saw the diamond necklace and totally fell in love with it, and I didn’t have money that time, and I said ‘Baby it’ll be yours one day’?”
Wife, with a smile and blushing: “Yeah I remember that my love!”
Husband: “Well, I’m in the pub just next to that shop.”
Husband: “Darling, you remember that jewellery shop where you saw the diamond necklace and totally fell in love with it, and I didn’t have money that time, and I said ‘Baby it’ll be yours one day’?”
Wife, with a smile and blushing: “Yeah I remember that my love!”
Husband: “Well, I’m in the pub just next to that shop.”
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Scientists who were against genetic engineering have managed to cross a seagull with a sheep.
Which is a massive ewe tern.
Which is a massive ewe tern.
