The Official TP Funnies thread ( Jokes Memes etc )

Mrs Nod says she might use that. Not a problem - I won't hear her!!!
 
Reminds me of a documentary made by Dr Graeme Garden about a kitten and the Post Office Tower.
 
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The best doctor can never make you younger.
The best they can ever do is make you older.
 
My memory is getting so bad, I asked the pharmacist, “Do you have any Acetylsalicylic acid?”
“You mean aspirin?” asked the pharmacist.
“That’s it! I can never remember that word.”
 
Not necessarily - he's not 'fraid of NO ghosts but isn't automatically 'fraid of SOME ghosts.
 
Not necessarily - he's not 'fraid of NO ghosts but isn't automatically 'fraid of SOME ghosts.
You may be correct. I suppose he may not be afraid of 'no ghosts', but then he might not be afraid of some ghosts, or indeed any ghosts at all; he might even BE a ghost for all we know. I don't think we have enough to continue without more information and context.
Personally, I am not afraid of ghosts, indeed, I don't actually believe ghosts exist at all, or god, or alien invasion—I do believe in crystal healing!

(Nah, I don't believe that either).
:giggle:
 
Reminded me of this oldie

Eye halve a spelling chequer
It came with my pea sea
It plainly marques four my revue
Miss steaks eye kin knot sea.

Eye strike a key and type a word
And weight four it two say
Weather eye am wrong oar write
It shows me strait a weigh.

As soon as a mist ache is maid
It nose bee fore two long
And eye can put the error rite
Its rarely ever wrong.

Eye have run this poem threw it
I am shore your pleased two no
Its letter perfect in it's weigh
My chequer tolled me sew.
 
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