The Official TP Funnies thread ( Jokes Memes etc )

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Three young girls were walking in the woods and came upon tracks. The first one said, "Look, it's deer tracks." The second one said, "No, it's wolf tracks" and before the third one could answer, they got hit by a train.
 
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Young Paddy bought a donkey from a farmer for £100.
The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day.
The next day he drove up and said, 'Sorry son,
but I have some bad news. The donkey's died.'
Paddy replied, 'Well then just give me my money back.'
The farmer said, 'Can't do that. I've already spent it.'
Paddy said, 'OK, then, just bring me the dead donkey.'
The farmer asked, 'What are you going to do with him?'
Paddy said, 'I'm going to raffle him off.'
The farmer said, 'You can't raffle a dead donkey!'
Paddy said, 'Sure I can. Watch me. I just won't tell anybody
he's dead.'
A month later, the farmer met up with Paddy and asked,
' What happened with that dead donkey?'
Paddy said, 'I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at £2 each
and made a profit of £898'
The farmer said, 'Didn't anyone complain?'
Paddy said, 'Just the guy who won. So I gave him his £2 back.
 
The lucky sheep got shot in the chest... (Used to sell the crayons!)
 
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I nicked it from somewhere else but the fact that it hasn't appeared here before leads me to suspect that it hasn't hit farceache yet!
 
Nod said:
I nicked it from somewhere else but the fact that it hasn't appeared here before leads me to suspect that it hasn't hit farceache yet!
Click to expand...
It has now! :LOL: I have several friends with Labs...
 
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