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The Official TP Funnies thread ( Jokes Memes etc )
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saltireblue
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munch
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Sometimes it DOES take a Rocket Scientist!!
Scientists at Rolls Royce built a gun specifically to launch dead chickens at the windshields of airliners and military jets all traveling at maximum velocity.
The idea is to simulate the frequent incidents of collisions with airborne fowl to test the strength of the windshields.
American engineers heard about the gun and were eager to test it on the Windshields of their new high-speed trains.
Arrangements were made, and a gun was sent to the American engineers.
When the gun was fired, the engineers stood shocked as the chicken hurtled out of the barrel, crashed into the shatterproof shield, smashed it to smithereens, blasted through the control console, snapped the engineer's backrest in two, and embedded itself in the back wall of the cabin like an arrow shot from a bow.
The horrified Yanks sent Rolls Royce the disastrous results of the experiment, along with the designs of the windshield, and begged the British scientists for suggestions.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Rolls Royce responded with a one-line memo:
"Defrost the chicken."
Scientists at Rolls Royce built a gun specifically to launch dead chickens at the windshields of airliners and military jets all traveling at maximum velocity.
The idea is to simulate the frequent incidents of collisions with airborne fowl to test the strength of the windshields.
American engineers heard about the gun and were eager to test it on the Windshields of their new high-speed trains.
Arrangements were made, and a gun was sent to the American engineers.
When the gun was fired, the engineers stood shocked as the chicken hurtled out of the barrel, crashed into the shatterproof shield, smashed it to smithereens, blasted through the control console, snapped the engineer's backrest in two, and embedded itself in the back wall of the cabin like an arrow shot from a bow.
The horrified Yanks sent Rolls Royce the disastrous results of the experiment, along with the designs of the windshield, and begged the British scientists for suggestions.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Rolls Royce responded with a one-line memo:
"Defrost the chicken."
munch
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| 1. Teaching Math In 1950... A logger sells a truckload of timber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5 of the price. What is his profit? $____ 2 Teaching Math In 1970. A logger sells a truckload of timber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5 of the price, or $80. What is his profit? $___ 3 Teaching Math In 1990. A logger sells a truckload of timber for $100. His cost of production is $80. Did he make a profit? __Yes or __No 4. Teaching Math In 2000. A logger sells a truckload of timber for $100. His cost of production is $80 and his profit is $20. Your assignment: Underline the number 20. 5. Teaching Math In 2015. A logger cuts down a beautiful forest because he is selfish and inconsiderate and cares nothing for the habitat of animals or the preservation of our woodlands. He does this so he can make a profit of $20. What do you think of this way of making a living? Topic for class participation after answering the question: How did the birds and squirrels feel as the logger cut down their homes 6. Teaching Math in 2021 Math is Racist. Students no longer need any math skills to Graduate school. 2+2 = 4, or 22 whatever you feel is correct. There are no wrong answers, feel free to express your feelings e.g., anger, anxiety, inadequacy, helplessness, etc. Should you require debriefing at the conclusion of the exam there are Counsellors available to assist you to adjust back into the real world. |