The Official TP Funnies thread ( Jokes Memes etc )

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How do cats carry their young? Looks like it depends on the type of cat...

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I went shopping today and i was behind a grandfather and his badly behaved grandson. He had his hands full with the child screaming for sweets, biscuits, all sorts of things.
The grandad is saying in a controlled voice: "Easy, William, we won't be long ... easy boy."
Another outburst and i heard the grandad calmly say: "It's ok William. Just a couple more minutes and we'll be out of here. Hang in there, boy."
At the checkout the little horror is throwing items out the trolley. Grandad says again a controlled voice: "William, William, relax boy, don't get upset, we'll be home in five minutes."
Well, i was really impressed, so i went outside to where the Grandfather is loading the groceries and the boy into the car. I said to the Grandad "It's none of my business but you were amazing in there. The whole time you kept your composure and calmly kept saying things would be okay. William is very lucky to have you as a Grandad."
"Thanks," said the Grandad. "But i am William. The little b*****d's name is Kevin."
 
It was funnier yesterday.... :LOL:

Cobra said:
I went shopping today in Asda and i was behind a grandfather and his badly-behaved grandson.
He has his hands full with the child screaming for sweets, biscuits, all sorts of things.
The granddad is saying in a controlled voice: “Easy, William, we won’t be long . . . easy boy.”

Another outburst and I heard the granddad calmly say : “It’s okay William. Just a couple more minutes and we’ll be out of here. Hang in there, boy.”

At the checkout the little horror is throwing items out of the trolley. Granddad says again in a controlled voice : “William, William, relax buddy, don’t get upset. We’ll be home in five minutes, stay cool William.”

Well, i was really impressed, so i went outside to where the grandfather is loading his groceries and the boy into the car. I said to the Grandad “It’s none of my business, but you were amazing in there. I don’t know how you did it.
That whole time you kept your composure, and no matter how loud and disruptive he got, you just calmly kept saying things would be okay.
William is very lucky to have you as his granddad.”

“Thanks,” said the Granddad. “But I am William. The little b*****d’s name is Kevin.
Click to expand...
Brendan Mulachy said:
I went shopping today and i was behind a grandfather and his badly behaved grandson. He had his hands full with the child screaming for sweets, biscuits, all sorts of things.
The grandad is saying in a controlled voice: "Easy, William, we won't be long ... easy boy."
Another outburst and i heard the grandad calmly say: "It's ok William. Just a couple more minutes and we'll be out of here. Hang in there, boy."
At the checkout the little horror is throwing items out the trolley. Grandad says again a controlled voice: "William, William, relax boy, don't get upset, we'll be home in five minutes."
Well, i was really impressed, so i went outside to where the Grandfather is loading the groceries and the boy into the car. I said to the Grandad "It's none of my business but you were amazing in there. The whole time you kept your composure and calmly kept saying things would be okay. William is very lucky to have you as a Grandad."
"Thanks," said the Grandad. "But i am William. The little b*****d's name is Kevin."
Click to expand...
 
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