The Official TP Funnies thread ( Jokes Memes etc )

cosmicma said:
11457_molasses.jpg
Click to expand...

reminds me of the one regarding two missionary nuns on holiday to New York, and came to the hot dog stand. The first nun took one look at her purchase and threw it into the trash can.
Turned to her companion and asked "So what part of the dog did you get?"
 
So, apparently Meghan Merkle’s father will not attend the Royal Wedding.

That's ok though, neither will Harry's.
 
Steep said:
So, apparently Meghan Merkle’s father will not attend the Royal Wedding.

That's ok though, neither will Harry's.
Click to expand...
HARSH! but fair :D
 
Steep said:
So, apparently Meghan Merkle’s father will not attend the Royal Wedding.

That's ok though, neither will Harry's.
Click to expand...
Sound of a large inrush of breath!!
(Actually neither will his Mum)
 
Was in Homebase today and spotted this great idea - do it yourself chairs!

palllet chair.jpg
 
Only the right hand strip Toni :(
 
My friend's wife left him last week. She said she was going out for milk and never came back...

I asked him how he was coping.
He said, "Not bad. I've been using some of that powdered stuff!"
 
During sex last night, my partner whispered in my ear, "Pretend you're my dad."

I was furious. "You are one sick-minded girl, what a disgusting thing to ask me." I stormed out of the bedroom and slammed the door.

I mean, you don't expect s*** like that from your sister, do you?
 
32651626_405702579904891_3526189221125554176_n.jpg
 
Tringa said:
I'd been hard at it last night when my wife said, "Size doesn't matter'. I think she was trying to be kind to me but then the wallpaper fell off the wall.

Dave
Click to expand...


Shouldn't that be "Size does matter?" ..... and she was being cruel .... :D
 
n0chex said:
During sex last night, my partner whispered in my ear, "Pretend you're my dad."

I was furious. "You are one sick-minded girl, what a disgusting thing to ask me." I stormed out of the bedroom and slammed the door.

I mean, you don't expect s*** like that from your sister, do you?
Click to expand...


Reminds me of the old Jethro (IIRC) joke about the rodeo position where you start making love as usual then whisper in your partner's ear "You're good at this but your sister's better!" Then hang on!
 
  • Like
Reactions: Doc
"I've been a very bad girl", she said, biting her bottom lip, "I deserve to be punished".

"Fair enough", I said and installed windows 10 onto her laptop.
 
Nod said:
That you spend too much time on too many FB groups? :p:D
Click to expand...
I'm only on a couple, but people send me stuff from other groups ..


Talking of being sent stuff, this is the weirdest thing I've been sent,
Its not really safe for work ..
But if you insist on clicking on it, make sure you watch it all, right to the credits.
It does make you wonder what the originator was searching for when he came across it though ..
Oh and sound on, it has a catchy tune (y)


View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j_FpdOm4_2I
 
Last edited:
Cobra said:
I'm only on a couple, but people send me stuff from other groups ..


Talking of being sent stuff, this is the weirdest thing I've been sent,
Its not really safe for work ..
But if you insist on clicking on it, make sure you watch it all, right to the end.
It does make you wonder what the originator was searching for when he came across it though ..
Oh and sound on, it has a catchy tune (y)


View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j_FpdOm4_2I
Click to expand...

PMSL

That has got to be one of the weirdest!

Ban ban ban
 
Last edited:
Back to "normality"


32747827_406291486512667_9080171423409897472_n.jpg
 
Cobra said:
I'm only on a couple, but people send me stuff from other groups ..


Talking of being sent stuff, this is the weirdest thing I've been sent,
Its not really safe for work ..
But if you insist on clicking on it, make sure you watch it all, right to the credits.
It does make you wonder what the originator was searching for when he came across it though ..
Oh and sound on, it has a catchy tune (y)


View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j_FpdOm4_2I
Click to expand...
Geeeeez thats real s***e............lol
 
Cobra said:
I'm only on a couple, but people send me stuff from other groups ..


Talking of being sent stuff, this is the weirdest thing I've been sent,
Its not really safe for work ..
But if you insist on clicking on it, make sure you watch it all, right to the credits.
It does make you wonder what the originator was searching for when he came across it though ..
Oh and sound on, it has a catchy tune (y)


View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j_FpdOm4_2I
Click to expand...
Normal behaviour up here in the welsh hillsides
 
Cobra said:
I'm only on a couple, but people send me stuff from other groups ..


Talking of being sent stuff, this is the weirdest thing I've been sent,
Its not really safe for work ..
But if you insist on clicking on it, make sure you watch it all, right to the credits.
It does make you wonder what the originator was searching for when he came across it though ..
Oh and sound on, it has a catchy tune (y)


View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j_FpdOm4_2I
Click to expand...

Superb. Here's the outtakes:

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V-V9K9cOG1Y
also NSFW
 
rotfpmsl I'll have that bloody tune in my head all night now ,and counting sheep :coat::coat:
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top