"I'll nut ya - you nicked my seat"

[Sparkles33]

Dear me. I had to share....this really shocked me.

I was on the bus today and a boy (about 7) had stood up on a packed bus. His mother was at the back of the bus and he was at the front. An elderly lady with 2 sticks sat there. The boy then proceeded to scream, shout and threaten the elderly lady with phrases such as "I'll nut ya, - you nicked my seat" , all the while shouting to his mother, complaining that it was his seat. The lady, and those around him laughed, uncomfortably. He eventually meandered back towards his mother, of his own accord, after ringing the bell to stop randomly, half a dozen times.

 

[gus607]

This child is the Scum of the future.

 

[BRASH]

No discipline. This is what happens after years of our bloody nanny state. Had I acted like that as a kid my dad'd have taken the skin off my backside, bloody rightly too. Fact!!!!

 

[Yellowbelly]

No great surprise. A few months ago, Mrs Y and I stopped off at a roadside cafe for a brew and a bite. We had been in there a few minutes whilst awaiting our order when a family consisting of a man, woman and a child of around six or seven years old arrived. We knew they had arrived before we saw them due to the shouting and screamiong of said delightful child. They were ahown to their seats by a waitress whilst the din continued. Within a few sweconds, the "delightful child" clambered on to the table a proceeded to to jump up and down whilst screaming at full volume.

We expected the management to intervene at this point, but no, this behaviour continued whilst the doting paraents repeated "no, you mustn't do that, please get down", "you will get into trouble", please don't be naughty" etc. ad nauseum. This continued seemingly for an age when at last I snapped and approached the manager and asked him politely what he intended to do. His reply was "what can I do?"

We promptly walked out.

 

[BruceMo]

This child is the Scum of the future.

Or a very sad waste of potential
It really saddens me when I see this sort of behavior and the parents totally ignore or are oblivious to it
I wonder what some of these kids could achieve with some guidance and encouragement

 

[gramps]

I wonder what some of these kids could achieve with some guidance and encouragement

 

[dod]

No discipline. This is what happens after years of out bloody nanny state. Had I acted like that as a kid my dad'd have taken the skin off my backside, bloody rightly too. Fact!!!!

we could be brothers.

 

[BRASH]

we could be brothers.

How? Did your da' hae a thing wi my ma'??

 

[MWHCVT]

we could be brothers.

I'm not that old and my old man would have done the same to me, it saddens me to see children behave like the opening post describes,

 

[BruceMo]

Not sure what the story is here, but you wouldn't want to walk in and see that in anyones home, never mind your own
Why we seem to encourage some of the least well suited to parenting, to breed huge roosts with little or no control is beyond me
I too was brought up with a father who would say something very sore if I ever behaved like the OP story

 

[Nod]

No great surprise. A few months ago, Mrs Y and I stopped off at a roadside cafe for a brew and a bite. We had been in there a few minutes whilst awaiting our order when a family consisting of a man, woman and a child of around six or seven years old arrived. We knew they had arrived before we saw them due to the shouting and screamiong of said delightful child. They were ahown to their seats by a waitress whilst the din continued. Within a few sweconds, the "delightful child" clambered on to the table a proceeded to to jump up and down whilst screaming at full volume.

We expected the management to intervene at this point, but no, this behaviour continued whilst the doting paraents repeated "no, you mustn't do that, please get down", "you will get into trouble", please don't be naughty" etc. ad nauseum. This continued seemingly for an age when at last I snapped and approached the manager and asked him politely what he intended to do. His reply was "what can I do?"

We promptly walked out.

In a very similar situation but where the father (or at least the man with the woman and kids...) asked what he could do, I turned round and told him exactly what he could do and could he make sure he took the fornicating brat with him when he did. Unseen by the couple(?) , the manager just grinned.

 

[Sparkles33]

It's so sad. I was genuinely shocked.

People bang on about "ahh, wey, ya know, you can't smack em now days!" smacked or not, IMHO that child should've been chastised.

 

[toadstool]

(I miss the other sad shaking head smiley!)

No discipline. This is what happens after years of out bloody nanny state. Had I acted like that as a kid my dad'd have taken the skin off my backside, bloody rightly too. Fact!!!!

My mum would've done the same and I'm barely mid-20's.

 

[Russ77]

I spent a week at Center Parcs with my in-laws including my sister-in-law's 4 year old boy.

Admittedly he wasn't well but he'd randomly just say "You're rubbish... I hate you" with more venom than I thought possible from a 4 year old kid

He's never had a bedtime, he's never been made to go to bed, he decides when he goes to bed..... 10pm one night he's in his room demanding monster munch and getting them!

Every morning he refused to eat breakfast and demanded sweets, the response to this was "I suppose at least it means he's eating something"

He also refused to get in the bath, the scenario went something like this:

"Parent": Get in the bath
"Kid": Me not getting in the bath
Repeat several times
"Parent": I'll let you watch Octonaughts on my phone
"Kid": Me want Octonaughts
"Parent": Get in the bath then
Repeat several times
Eventually he watched Octonaughts and didn't get in the bath
30 mins later the battle is still going
An hour later he still isn't in the bath

Now I'm "only" 36, that scenario wouldn't have gone on for more than 10 mins before I'd have been stripped, dunked, washed and out of the bath before I had a chance to say Octonaughts

It's not his fault really but a good lesson for what not to do when I have kids

 

[wibbly]

In a very similar situation but where the father (or at least the man with the woman and kids...) asked what he could do, I turned round and told him exactly what he could do and could he make sure he took the fornicating brat with him when he did. Unseen by the couple(?) , the manager just grinned.

Let's hope you never proffer me advice in such a manner about my kids, that's all I'll say...

 

[jakeblu]

No discipline. This is what happens after years of out bloody nanny state. Had I acted like that as a kid my dad'd have taken the skin off my backside, bloody rightly too. Fact!!!!

Yeah because we really want our children to learn that when we want our own way violence is the answer

Jakeblu aka Steve

 

[MWHCVT]

Yeah because we really want our children to learn that when we want our own way violence is the answer

Jakeblu aka Steve

Children need punishment, now it dosn't have to be a smacked arse but I tell you what just the thought of a smacked arse would have me in line as a kid....

Be it naughty step, taking away toys, TV what ever but boundaries are needed

 

[BruceMo]

Yeah because we really want our children to learn that when we want our own way violence is the answer

Jakeblu aka Steve

I think the point here is, this wee boy will soon be a big boy and if his actions always go without reprimand, at some point this out of control behaviour will spiral into real violence
A swift albeit painful censure now might keep this kid out of jail and whomever he encounters out of hospital
It's the certain knowledge that a clip round the ear will follow unacceptable actions that provide a moral compass
If we all get to be self serving and uncaring, the big bullies will rule the world and the weak and vulnerable will suffer. Kind of like tories on steroids I suppose

 

[mid_gen]

This is why I won't be living in the UK any time soon.

 

[wibbly]

I think the point here is, this wee boy will soon be a big boy and if his actions always go without reprimand, at some point this out of control behaviour will spiral into real violence
A swift albeit painful censure now might keep this kid out of jail and whomever he encounters out of hospital
It's the certain knowledge that a clip round the ear will follow unacceptable actions that provide a moral compass
If we all get to be self serving and uncaring, the big bullies will rule the world and the weak and vulnerable will suffer. Kind of like tories on steroids I suppose

I'm not sure teaching a child that you'll inflict pain on them if they're naughty is a great thing or that it provides any kind of moral compass. After all you wouldn't beat a dog would you?

I don't think not willing to be violent with our children creates an environment of serve serving and uncaring parents. I prefer to bring my Daughter up knowing right from wrong, teaching her to respect others and showing her how to respect and behave toward others. It's not easy and she falters often. That's what kids do - but chastising her with violence or allowing her to live in a world of fear of thinking you'll be violent with her for doing so? Why would anyone do that...

 

[POAH]

This is why I won't be living in the UK any time soon.

because children are naughty? - pretty sure children behave like this the world over

 

[POAH]

I'm not sure teaching a child that you'll inflict pain on them if they're naughty is a great thing or that it provides any kind of moral compass. After all you wouldn't beat a dog would you?

I don't think not willing to be violent with our children creates an environment of serve serving and uncaring parents. I prefer to bring my Daughter up knowing right from wrong, teaching her to respect others and showing her how to respect and behave toward others. It's not easy and she falters often. That's what kids do - but chastising her with violence or allowing her to live in a world of fear of thinking you'll be violent with her for doing so? Why would anyone do that...

my kids know right from wrong but that doesn't stop them being little s***s lol

 

[MartynK]

This sort of thing is down to poor parenting. Children - just like young animals - learn from the example of the adults around them, and need guidance and discipline. Being naughty is part of growing up and exploring the boundaries. Good parents know this, and understand that it is normal, but they also know where to draw the line.

 

[u8myufo]

Yeah because we really want our children to learn that when we want our own way violence is the answer

Jakeblu aka Steve

Wrong! Have you ever seen a Lioness give her cubs a few short knocks when weaning them of the feed? A few times is all that is usually needed before they get the message. Children start developing those all important learning skills almost from the day they are born. Start imprinting things into them from an early age. When my two boys were younger there was 11 months between them, all in all they were great. At around that terrible two stage the oldest started biting the other if he could not get his own way. So he recieved a bite from me, hard enough to understand what pain he was inflciting but not enough to draw blood. Guess what? He never did that again. The youngest would get really frustrated if there was something he could not do, so much so he would throw himself on the floor and start banging his head, both me and the wife were worried about it. All avenues of finding a cure to stop that lead nowhere, mentioned it to my parents and my Dad said is there anything he does not like, the only thing I could think of was that he hated having a bath, my Dad turned and said throw a cup of cold water at his face. Guess what? A couple of times of doing that and he stopped. My! My! what a bad parent I was eh? If you do not teach them bounderies the older they get the more they will do it and the more damage they will cause, they end up with no respect for anyone or anything. Now dont get me wrong all kids are different, all I am saying is that if the child that is being raised is of the nature that he/she is a little sheeite then they need disciplining accordingly.

 

[Sparkles33]

I think, the boy had obviously picked up such phrases and behaviour and needed chastising. I don't believe in smacking, however, he should have been chastised. However the parents decide, nothing to do with me kinda thing, but that behaviour certainly wasn't acceptable and his mother was less than concerned. If he grows up believing that's acceptable behaviour, he's going to have a tough road ahead of him.

 

[Nod]

Let's hope you never proffer me advice in such a manner about my kids, that's all I'll say...

If your kid was behaving in a similar manner and you didn't know what to do, I would offer the same advice. I would hope you've brought your children up to behave better than the above scenario.

 

[nilagin]

I never had to hit either of my two sons. For what ever reason just the threat of it was enough and they've both turned out reasonably well behaved, now 16 and 22. However on one occasion my youngest son aged around 3 or 4 started to off and create a nuisance in Tesco. One handed, I grabbed hold of his coat at his chest, raised him up to my eye level and snarled at him in a low voice, to quit it. That was all it took, he didn't go off into a sulk or anything, he just new he'd crossed a boundary.

 

[Cg_Girl]

Wrong! Have you ever seen a Lioness give her cubs a few short knocks when weaning them of the feed? A few times is all that is usually needed before they get the message. Children start developing those all important learning skills almost from the day they are born. Start imprinting things into them from an early age. When my two boys were younger there was 11 months between them, all in all they were great. At around that terrible two stage the oldest started biting the other if he could not get his own way. So he recieved a bite from me, hard enough to understand what pain he was inflciting but not enough to draw blood. Guess what? He never did that again. The youngest would get really frustrated if there was something he could not do, so much so he would throw himself on the floor and start banging his head, both me and the wife were worried about it. All avenues of finding a cure to stop that lead nowhere, mentioned it to my parents and my Dad said is there anything he does not like, the only thing I could think of was that he hated having a bath, my Dad turned and said throw a cup of cold water at his face. Guess what? A couple of times of doing that and he stopped. My! My! what a bad parent I was eh? If you do not teach them bounderies the older they get the more they will do it and the more damage they will cause, they end up with no respect for anyone or anything. Now dont get me wrong all kids are different, all I am saying is that if the child that is being raised is of the nature that he/she is a little sheeite then they need disciplining accordingly.

Agreed... My parents were the same with me and my brother, i think my brother was the one to start biting and they done the same... If we was naughty we got what was called "A Clump" which was a back hander across the back of the legs, my god it hurt but has it made us violent as adults? of course not!....

Even my children would never push it with my dad, they don't see him all that often and they have a lovely relationship with him, they know they would never be able to step the line though...

Sadly it's not the same for me, I'm by far not a soft touch but i do get a shocking amount of attitude from my 5yr old, like most he hates the word No, maybe i should send him on holiday to my parents for a week or 2.... i might add he would never speak like the boy in the OP though

 

[jakeblu]

Wrong! Have you ever seen a Lioness give her cubs a few short knocks when weaning them of the feed? A few times is all that is usually needed before they get the message. Children start developing those all important learning skills almost from the day they are born. Start imprinting things into them from an early age.

Im afraid the Lion anology just doesnt cut it for me Rich, for obvious reasons, neither would wish to 'imprint' my children that violence is the answer. How you discipline children in your home is your choice Rich but for me hitting children is not something I am comfortable with. I realise that not everyone feels that way especially with my generation, my dad beat me regularily but then I was an arse through most of my teenage years but I personally see no advantage at all to resorting to violence when disciplining children. Like I said earlier Rich its just my opinion and I respect yours, I just think yours is wrong

Steve

 

[BRASH]

Agreed... My parents were the same with me and my brother, i think my brother was the one to start biting and they done the same... If we was naughty we got what was called "A Clump" which was a back hander across the back of the legs, my god it hurt but has it made us violent as adults? of course not!....

Even my children would never push it with my dad, they don't see him all that often and they have a lovely relationship with him, they know they would never be able to step the line though...

Sadly it's not the same for me, I'm by far not a soft touch but i do get a shocking amount of attitude from my 5yr old, like most he hates the word No, maybe i should send him on holiday to my parents for a week or 2.... i might add he would never speak like the boy in the OP though

I bet you're a naught girl. Spank!!

 

[Cg_Girl]

I bet you're a naught girl. Spank!!

As a child... maybe a little, now though, you need a social life to be naughty

 

[BRASH]

As a child... maybe a little, now though, you need a social life to be naughty

You need to get out more then

 

[Cg_Girl]

You need to get out more then

If only!

 

[BRASH]

If only!

Awwwwwwe, poor wee you. Life's for living. Get on with it, it's not a dress rehearsal for anything else!!

 

[gramps]

There is a vast difference between 'discipline' and 'violence'.
Discipline involves training, example, encouragement, instruction ... and yes may include punishment e.g. withholding a privilege such as a favourite TV programme, a special food or being 'grounded' - it can also include reasonable physical discipline such as a controlled smack.
Violence is described as having "a high likelihood of resulting in injury, death, psychological harm, maldevelopment, or deprivation.", is generally uncontrolled as being administered in anger rather than in love and has no place in disciplining children - a smack, administered from love and care for the child and its place in society is not violence.

An undisciplined child will never be happy and will make those around him unhappy in the process, it is never right to fail to discipline a child in a loving way.
Sadly we live in a world today where "do your own thing" has become the mantra, with the result that 'rights' rather than 'responsibilities' has become the norm and nobody is any longer prepared to stand up and say "this is unacceptable" ... the consequence is that he/she who shouts loudest and creates the biggest fuss gets the priority attention and to heck with everyone else ... it does not bode well for the future

 

[Pete Allen]

my kids know right from wrong but that doesn't stop them being little tummy muds lol

Love that description

 

[jason7579]

Growing up I received daily smacks from my mum, my dad never raised his hand to me but he did send me to my room for hours on end with the electricity turned off. Sitting in the dark with nothing to do was much more of a punishment than a quick slap and sending me back outside so I could get into more trouble.

I think a lot of this was due to my dad getting the cane a fair bit at school. His exact words to me were "it didn't stop me, I just tried a little harder not to get caught next time".

For this reason I never smack my kids, I do take away privileges and in our case it works. My little boy (4) likes to push boundaries but anything like the behaviour in the original post above, he would have been off the bus and walking home. No matter how far.

 

[Spuff]

So he recieved a bite from me, hard enough to understand what pain he was inflciting but not enough to draw blood....

I'm not sure what's more bizarre - an adult biting a two year old hard enough to inflict pain, hitting children because it's what a lioness does with her cubs, or admitting all this on an open forum

 

[Sparkles33]

I'm not sure what's more bizarre - an adult biting a two year old hard enough to inflict pain, hitting children because it's what a lioness does with her cubs, or admitting all this on an open forum

It's how many parents teach their children, from what I gather. :shrug: In a parenting group I go to, biting was discussed. Almost everyone there with more than one child, admitted that they had bitten their child in response to their child biting them. Surely it would be frowned upon if a child bit a stranger (adult) and they responded in the same way? :shrug: So I don't know why it's acceptable if it's your own child. (Just thinking out loud here really.) Not judging those who do that, I just choose not to do that myself, IYKWIM? I don't know...just glad I'm not a shrink

 

[nilagin]

I'm not sure what's more bizarre - an adult biting a two year old hard enough to inflict pain, hitting children because it's what a lioness does with her cubs, or admitting all this on an open forum

It's not bizarre unless you have difficulties differentiating it from abuse, which it most certainly isn't.