Daughters (teenage) AGHHHHHHH....

RogWarham said:
Not removed the door - its one of her main training tools for the 2012 Olypmic Door Slamming event - we are worried that she may be peaking a touch early on this.
Rog
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I almost sprayed the coffee I was drinking all over my monitor after reading that:lol::lol::lol:


But now I’m a little worried as Rog hasn’t posted since the 21st …you don’t there’s been a ‘murdurre’ do you?:eek:
 
Ashers said:
u can imagine my apology if u like :)
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and you can imagine what its like posting on the forum, another 24 hours.:bang:
 
This thread is fantastic, minus the obvious, I'm currently dealing with the terrible 2's and this has given me so much insite on how to get set up for dealing with strops in the long run. I'm also of the opinion that kids are going to do what they like no matter what you do to try and stop them, all you can do is educate them and hope they make the right choices, also having an open channel of communication is a must
 
As perviousy said on a number of occasions this is a great read (if you ignore the juvenile in the ranks)


That said, I'm no longer sure whether this is acting as a warning of what to expect when my partner and I have children or whether its fast becoming a new form of contraception :eek: :lol:
 
I heard an acquaintance of mine on the phone to someone....
he's 18, at uni, living at home...
After he hung up I said "was that your mum you were speaking to?"
"yes, why?"
because, i said, if you spoke to anyone else in the world like that you'd get a punch in the face!
(we were waiting for our sword class to start)

I then phoned my mum later and apologised for the times I'd been a right ungrateful toerag on the phone...her opinion was that I still sounded like that sometimes...:( I disagree...hopefully !! p.s I'm 33!
 
matty said:
and you can imagine what its like posting on the forum, another 24 hours.:bang:
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Just wondering how many strikes it takes to be "out"?

BTW, kudos to Mrs C for her attitude and patience with mr (or should that be Master) ------
 
Nod said:
Just wondering how many strikes it takes to be "out"?

BTW, kudos to Mrs C for her attitude and patience with mr (or should that be Master) ------
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Thank you Nod. He does seem to be rather mentally impaired in the social skills side of things, so you have to make allowances I guess. He just makes me laugh with his ignorance now to be honest.
 
Ashers said:
u can imagine my apology if u like :)
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This is so ironic that it's on-topic, it almost hurts.

Parents : Take a look at your door-slamming, stroppy teenagers and be thankful....You may not realise it but you're doing a good job......you could get it so much more wrong and end up with manners like we've seen here ;)

PS. Permanuke for being consistently rude (Wasn't me though, please step forward the mod who did, take your glory and revel in it!)
 
Fair play and much respect for Mrs C, he was obviously going for the baiting technique to get a response
 
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AndrewA123 said:
As perviousy said on a number of occasions this is a great read (if you ignore the juvenile in the ranks)


That said, I'm no longer sure whether this is acting as a warning of what to expect when my partner and I have children or whether its fast becoming a new form of contraception :eek: :lol:
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I used to offer to loan mine out to couples desperately wanting to add their tuppence worth to the gene pool but strangely no one considered this particular form of contraception a good idea :whistling: :lol:




oh and sadly, I am not the mod stepping forward ;)
 
Rovers_Andy said:
Fair play and much respect for Mrs C, he was obviously going for the baiting technique to get a response
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Thank you very much Andy - but be careful, or I won't be able to fit through the door, my head will grow too big! ;)

PS to the moderator folks, my posts seem to be stuck on 120, and I'm sure I've made a fair few more than that. I'd better be careful, or I'll become a bit of a regular like my old man!
 
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just noticed the sub title below the juvenile clowns name, now it appears he's been nuked for good :lol: well done which ever mod came up with that :D

come on who's going to own up ? :D
 
Lol its ok, im sure there are plenty on here that will make sure that doesn't happen :lol: :rules:
 
Mrs Cowasaki said:
PS to the moderator folks, my posts seem to be stuck on 120, and I'm sure I've made a fair few more than that. I'd better be careful, or I'll become a bit of a regular like my old man!
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I don't think posts in Out of Focus are counted, Mrs C - only posts on the "proper" forums :)
 
Mrs Cowasaki said:
Thank you very much Andy - but be careful, or I won't be able to fit through the door, my head will grow too big! ;)

PS to the moderator folks, my posts seem to be stuck on 120, and I'm sure I've made a fair few more than that. I'd better be careful, or I'll become a bit of a regular like my old man!
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We can (both) rest easy now Mrs C. And your post count - posts in this out of focus forum don't increase it.
 
Wow this thread went pear shaped for a while, thought it was turning into a wedding thread:bang:

Well played Mrs Cowasaki for not responding to Ashers at his level:cuckoo:

Now can we get back to some light hearted moans about our offspring who give us 80% pleasure and 20%:'(.

Scott
 
My daughter is only 15 months old, so I'm not (at least for the moment) cursed with the kind of antics mentioned on this thread.

That said, she has just discovered the joys of throwing a tantrum. When she can't get her way, she has taken to starting bawling, lying on the floor and kicking her legs :D Even more amusingly, if she realises no-one is looking at her and paying attention, she stops, gets up and goes merrily on her way, having seemingly forgotten about what set her off in the first place!

We're very lucky - she's a good little girl 99% of the time. I fear that things can only go downhill as she grows up! ;)
 
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Lurking Lawyer said:
That said, she has just discussed the joys of throwing a tantrum. When she can't get her way, she has taken to starting bawling, lying on the floor and kicking her legs :D Even more amusingly, if she realises no-one is looking at her and paying attention, she stops, gets up and goes merrily on her way, having seemingly forgotten about what set her off in the first place!
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theres a very clever tv ad where a child starts throwing a tantrum in the supermarket, and the parent throws one and the kid just sits there staring at its mum with a look on its face that says 'what the **** are you doing!?'
 
Fear not Girls and Boys - no Murdurrrs have taken place - Thankfully!

Been away for a couple of days - and even better... left the Stroppy One down there... !!!! :D

Its ok - not dumped her on the side of the M4 and told her to walk home... (however tempting...) She is with with inlaws on their annual family holiday... I managed to stay/put up with them for almost 48 hours before work 'called' and I 'had' to come back... This has to be almost a record!!! (Apologies to anyone in South Wales for inflicting said Stroppy One on your region - then again I had better apologaise as well for you having to put up with the mother-in-law and her tribe...)

Its comforting to read that others have been in the same position.

Next hurdle is the GCSE results on Thursday... Quote from the Stroppy One..."Dont talk to me about them - you are So stressing me out..." I leave it to your imagination as to the tone of voice used in that sentence...

Oh well - just me here :) Time for a beer me thinks!

Rog
 
Lurking Lawyer said:
I don't think posts in Out of Focus are counted, Mrs C - only posts on the "proper" forums :)
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Thanks for pointing that out. I was a tad confused there for a while.:cuckoo:

Thanks also to MisterE for pointing out the same thing. Damned shame, as some of these topics are a lot of fun.
 
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foggy4ever said:
Wow this thread went pear shaped for a while, thought it was turning into a wedding thread:bang:

Well played Mrs Cowasaki for not responding to Ashers at his level:cuckoo:

Now can we get back to some light hearted moans about our offspring who give us 80% pleasure and 20%:'(.

Scott
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Thanks Foggy, and yes, it's about time it returned to the original topic
 
As I said earlier I had 2 boys. However I did have the experience of my late partners 2 daughters. They were lovely when they were pre-teen and thought I was great and always wanted to stay at my house. However when they reached puberty I became, in their eyes, the evil one. Once when I nicely suggested one of them ( then aged 11) would look much prettier with less makeup, she phoned a teenage support line on the radio to tell them about the horrible woman her Dad was with. They were a nightmare until they got to about 20.:)

Now I've got a beautiful but determined 6 year old grandaughter so we have it all to look forward to.
 
hypnotic said:
Ashers to Ashers ... Dust to dust.

Rip ... :D
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:lol::lol::lol: Kev :thumbs:

And I believe it ends with "If God won't have you the Devil must" :D

This has been a great thread :thumbs:
Thankfully my two are late teens and early 20's
"luckily" (like Marcel I laid the ground rules from a very early age)
They really were not too much of a problem, of course "we" had our moments
"we" were bound too, but all things considered, I guess they entered and endured puberty without to much stress on either side :thumbs:

Kudos to you Mrs C for the way you "handled" Ashers. :thumbs:


 
Ummmm...

Mrs C...

Was just sort of wondering...

If...

Well...

Kinda fancied looking after a certain 16 year daughter I know of...

You seem to be able to handle various problem people - thought you may like to rise to a challenge.

I can deliver - no fee... :D

Rog
 
Arkady said:
This reminds me of a colleague I worked with a while back - he's an ex-Para with two extremely gorgeous daughters. He frequently told them in no uncertain terms (but in jest) that if either of them ever brought a boyfrind home, he'd kill them on the doorstep... with this guy you never knew quite when he was joking or not.

Well the time eventually came to pass that a boyfriend came to call on the eldest daughter and Kev just happened to open the door. The lad just stammered for a bit, then looking at Kev (who hadn't said a word and was fully prepared to invite him in for a beer and a 'chat' about 'intentions' etc), suddenly turned and bolted!
Kev said later he was totally surprised, but the opportunity was too good to pass up, so he chased him for half a mile down the road...
Daughter #1 didn't speak to him for a week by all accounts and the poor lad never came back...
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i may have just moistened myself laughing.
i used to threaten to show em my knife collection.
 
ooh eck......am I really clairvoyant...........and who's responsible for
<---------------that :eek:
 
RogWarham said:
Ummmm...

Mrs C...

Was just sort of wondering...

If...

Well...

Kinda fancied looking after a certain 16 year daughter I know of...

You seem to be able to handle various problem people - thought you may like to rise to a challenge.

I can deliver - no fee... :D

Rog
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So funny!!! Ah, sadly at 16, the process is already in full swing - you'll just have to wait til she comes out the other side.

I don't know whether I've been extremely lucky with my four, or if my attitude to parenting has made a real difference - difficult to do a real scientific study with your own kids! ;-) I did make a conscious decision to handle parenting the way I do, based on the fact that I simply couldn't (and still can't really) talk to my parents, and that they were completely intolerant and impatient of any teenage attitudes and were not willing to listen to any of our opinions at all, unless they agreed with theirs of course. You can either mirror you own parents' methods if they're good, or go in completely the opposite direction if they were a bit rubbish.

My eldest lad, who is now almost 23, was a very difficult child, but we still came through his teenage years relatively unscathed. Even at 22, he can still dish the attitude out though, but when I point out how unreasonable he's being, he's quick to stop and apologise. Despite his faults though, he is loyal to a fault and vehemently defends me and his siblings when the need arises.

For me, it starts when they are old enough to talk and understand what you are saying to them. I have found the following to be helpful:

Rather than just tell them off for something, I always talked them through it and explained why such and such was wrong.

If they felt I was unfair, I would always listen to their views and respect them and would relent and apologise if I felt they were right - even when they were little - or even if I wasn't over the top, just listening to them would calm them down.

When they were young, if they were arguing and going hell for leather at each other, I would mediate and again, listen to both sides of the story, which usually ended up with them talking through their differences.

I always made a point of sharing my own faults with them - including telling them about all the stupid things I did in my past, when they were old enough to understand. That way, when I was out of order, , they were more understanding than they would otherwise have been. The listening and understanding thing has always been a two-way thing with me and the kids.

The other thing I had to do was be the bigger person when their dad and I split and he married a real battle axe of a woman - it wasn't easy but necessary. She used to be a friend of ours actually, but we drifted apart because we didn't like her personality and the way she dealt with her own and our kids. Ironic that he would go on to marry her. She would make the kids' lives absolute hell when they stayed with them (accusing them of all sorts that they had not done, sitting them down for a grilling every time they stayed, and letting her girls watch the "fun"!), and I always had to pick up the pieces when they came home distraught. Their father would refuse to see them for months at a time, whilst telling everyone that I was stopping access!!! I would constantly make sure that the kids kept in touch with their dad and saw him when he was willing. No matter how difficult it was, I had to be reasonable.

Don't get me wrong, my "being more a friend than a parent" approach has its drawbacks too. Sometimes, they get ideas above their station, and are cheeky in a very overly familiar way, because of the close relationship we have, but they soon back down again.

My girls have had their fare share of problems too. When the evil stepmother told Melissa that I am a bully (after I told her a few home truths via email), Melissa, who was going through emotional turmoil at the time, actually believed her and began to hate me. I was extremely ill a few years before that, and almost died in hospital, and she began to wonder what life would have been like if I had died, which became her wishing I had. She started to imagine ways in which she could do away with me. It was really intense. Fortunately, she told me all this as it was happening, because we've always been close and she's always confided in me, and she didn't know how to do anything else, and came to the conclusion that she couldn't get through it unless she did talk to me. She knew it would hurt me but knew that we could both cope better that way than if she didn't talk to me about it. I just cuddled her and listened to her and we cried together, and I told her that her feelings were perfectly normal and that sometimes your mind plays tricks with you. The human brain is capable of imagining some pretty horrible things. After a few months, she came out the other side and we're closer than ever.

My other daughter recently dropped out of college and was petrified that I would be furious with her for hating college and wanting to leave. My husband (her stepfather Cowasaki) and I listened and allowed her to leave, as there is little point her being miserable in what she's doing. She's still at home now after leaving college in about April, and is just considering a career in horticulture after thoroughly enjoying helping me with our garden over the summer holiday.

I'm just going through some minor strops from my youngest, fifteen year old lad. But again, he's generally a very good lad, and any strop is very short lived. Most of the time, we all have a right laugh.

The kids (older three) and their partners come to me to talk about problems - even of a sexual nature, because they know they can trust and confide in me.

All the above works for me and my kids - it may not work for others - but one thing I can say is that I LOVE being a parent. It's the best thing I've ever done.
 
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