Would you let your 16 yr old daughter go camping with her friends?

Would you let your 16 yr old daughter go camping with her friends?

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kennysarmy

kennysarmy

Yeah but can your army do this?
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Jeff
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Initially it was, please can I go camping with my friends, one of the families is going too and we are going to borrow a tent and stay there for 2 nights. Now I find out the other family is not actually going which means it's 7 or 8 16yr old girls on there own at a camp site about 10 miles from where we live....
 
Im surprised the campsite are happy to allow 7 or 8 unaccompanied 16 yo girls on their site camping in the first place TBH. Probably not going to be the quietest tents on the site are they.
 
It depends how sensible your daughter is - at 16 they are old enough to be out of parental control overnight - but only you can decide whether she's responsible enough not to do something idiotic. On the otherhand the fact that she's lied to you about parents going doesn't bode well and would give grounds for refusing .
 
DorsetDude said:
Im surprised the campsite are happy to allow 7 or 8 unaccompanied 16 yo girls on their site camping in the first place TBH. Probably not going to be the quietest tents on the site are they.
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this

if a campsite is going to let 8 16 yo girls camp there then it would not be the sort of campsite I would like my 16 yo daughter staying at.

that said my eldest is nearly 13 so I am yet to hit this point in parenthood yet.
 
big soft moose said:
It depends how sensible your daughter is - at 16 they are old enough to be out of parental control overnight - but only you can decide whether she's responsible enough not to do something idiotic. On the otherhand the fact that she's lied to you about parents going doesn't bode well and would give grounds for refusing .
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I have yet to determine if she did lie or if the parents of the other girl have had to change their arrangements....I will speak to them soon.

I think it's not just a case of are the girls sensible enough, it's what happens if there is an emergency or a situation.....
 
Of course you let her go! Your little girl is growing up! Try to enjoy it as much as she's going to! And I speak as a father whose daughters are now 20 and 22.

Of course she's lying to you about what she's getting up to - and it's probably less than you fear - and there will probably be some dramas on their camping trip; they'll set a Primus strove on fire or be told off for too much noise, but they probably won't be abducted and sold into white slavery!

She has a phone too, hasn't she, Jeff? They'll phone you, probably too much, if anything's worrying them. ;)
 
kennysarmy said:
I think it's not just a case of are the girls sensible enough, it's what happens if there is an emergency or a situation.....
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if there's an emergency or situation then if they are sensible they'll handle it ... I'd guess that they'll mostly have mobiles , and the average campsite will have a warden on site

as per the campsite policy - most wouldn't take a booking like that but it depends if they know ... if all they've been told is yeah there's 8 of us , then they might have taken the booking expecting young adults
 
Crickey was it really 16 years ago I faced this dilema :)
yes her and her mates concocted a story to tell you the other family were going, I doubt they ever were, but that is so all the girls would be allowed to go together.
She's growing up, she'll be excited and nervous too as she starts to explore the limits of her freedom. If she's going with a few mates she should be fine. You will of course worry about if she has enough food, warm enough, not getting drunk etc but you are now entering that phase where you little girl is starting to not need you so much. If you're asking on here if it's ok I'm guessing you've done a pretty good job so far and now it's time to start to let her gradually go her own way, she'll probably be going to Uni in a couple of years, start preparing her and yourself for that day by letting go bit by bit.

My wife and her (then) boyfrien plus me all went camping when she was 16 (OK it was few years ago and we were all so much more innocent) but she never came to any harm, other than she married me of course (a few years later, not over that particular weekend :) ).

Matt
 
Are the friends all female, or is it mixed?
 
Yves Geza said:
Of course you let her go! Your little girl is growing up! Try to enjoy it as much as she's going to! And I speak as a father whose daughters are now 20 and 22.

Of course she's lying to you about what she's getting up to - and it's probably less than you fear - and there will probably be some dramas on their camping trip; they'll set a Primus strove on fire or be told off for too much noise, but they probably won't be abducted and sold into white slavery!

She has a phone too, hasn't she, Jeff? They'll phone you, probably too much, if anything's worrying them. ;)
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Yep, that about covers it.

Interesting to consider if people would have more or less qualms if it was a 16 year old boy.
 
PatrickO said:
Yep, that about covers it.

Interesting to consider if people would have more or less qualms if it was a 16 year old boy.
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To be fair....for pretty good reason.
 
to be honest I'd suspect (having been a 16 year old boy once upon a time) that the potential for drink, drugs, inappropriate behaviour and general bellendery is significantly higher with boys than girls.

the perception of the girls being in danger from a sexual predator is a media myth - they are probably in more danger of that when they go into town in the middle of the day than they are at a campsite in the countryside
 
Will there be drugs ? Probably

Will there be alcohol? Most definitely

Will there be sexual intercourse? More than likely.

But those things will all happen anyway so at least you'll know where she is when it's occurring.

Let her enjoy her youth :-)
 
big soft moose said:
to be honest I'd suspect (having been a 16 year old boy once upon a time) that the potential for drink, drugs, inappropriate behaviour and general bellendery is significantly higher with boys than girls.

the perception of the girls being in danger from a sexual predator is a media myth - they are probably in more danger of that when they go into town in the middle of the day than they are at a campsite in the countryside
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Pretty obvious you are out of touch with 16yo girls, or girls of most ages TBH, girls have far more potential for trouble then you realise.

But to the OP I have 2 daughters who survived those years and were allowed to go off with mates, they didn't cone to any harm
and have grown into level headed adults
 
big soft moose said:
to be honest I'd suspect (having been a 16 year old boy once upon a time) that the potential for drink, drugs, inappropriate behaviour and general bellendery is significantly higher with boys than girls.

the perception of the girls being in danger from a sexual predator is a media myth - they are probably in more danger of that when they go into town in the middle of the day than they are at a campsite in the countryside
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I'm not saying they're at risk from a "sexual predator" (you really need to stop reading the Mail)....I'm saying that if the camp site is willing to accept a group of 16 yo female kids, then they're as likely to also accept a similarly sized group of male kids. Throw in a mix of warm weather / alcohol / excitement at the sheer thrill of being sans adults / hormones, ....and someone's possibly coming home pregnant.
 
By the time my daughter was 16 mixed "parties" at our house where not uncommon. All parents knew we were having a party and drinking was likely to be taking place and that they would mainly be sleeping in the living room (both boys & girls) It is all a matter of trust. I trusted my daughter, we knew her friends and there parents/guardians, so we never had a problem. I am not naive enough to believe nothing went on, but if young adults want to have sexual relations they will. But generally they want to do that sort of thing in private so having a lot of people together tends to reduce that sort of thing happening.
 
CanonDjango said:
Will there be drugs ? Probably

Will there be alcohol? Most definitely

Will there be sexual intercourse? More than likely.

But those things will all happen anyway so at least you'll know where she is when it's occurring.

Let her enjoy her youth :)
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Spot on... remember we were all 16 once and our parents (certainly at the time) had little idea. Its normal behaviour. If you try to restrict she will rebel anyway. I will certainly not be holding my kids back when old enough...
 
viv1969 said:
I'm not saying they're at risk from a "sexual predator" (you really need to stop reading the Mail)....I'm saying that if the camp site is willing to accept a group of 16 yo female kids, then they're as likely to also accept a similarly sized group of male kids. Throw in a mix of warm weather / alcohol / excitement at the sheer thrill of being sans adults / hormones, ....and someone's possibly coming home pregnant.
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give them plenty of condoms and make sure they understand the risks and that's all you can do.
 
... and don't let middle aged gunslingers like Canon Django know where they are!! :banghead:

FFS! It's a 16 year old going on a camping trip with her classmates! Of course she could be lying about ithe whole thing and she's actually planning to elope to a Birmingham motel with her inamoratus, but I'll bet not! Equally, I suspect a group of 16 year old classmates have lots of knowledge about sex and drugs and alcohol - and most of it will be theoretical but as Munch said so rightly, there's enormous safety in numbers and you can usually trust a whole group of kids to protect each other!

BTW, having been one and parented both, I still think teenaged boys and groups of boys are far more at risk of reckless bravado, violence or mishap than girls! You know, just like "The Inbetweeners" ;)
 
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viv1969 said:
I'm saying that if the camp site is willing to accept a group of 16 yo female kids, then they're as likely to also accept a similarly sized group of male kids. Throw in a mix of warm weather / alcohol / excitement at the sheer thrill of being sans adults / hormones, ....and someone's possibly coming home pregnant.
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if sixteen year olds want to get it on, they will - parents can't keep them under lock and key 24/7 - its preferable to bring them up to know about safe sex.

Gremlin said:
Pretty obvious you are out of touch with 16yo girls, or girls of most ages TBH, girls have far more potential for trouble then you realise.
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but the sort of trouble is different - a bunch of girls on a campsite may well get drunk and raucous and generally be a pain in the arse to other campers , but they are far less likely than boys to have a 'who can start the biggest fire' contest
 
You obviously don't know some of the 16yo girls I do
 
I'm very surprised that the campsite would accept the booking. It may well be revoked if they turn up without an adult.

Worth checking before they make the journey.

(written while Jeff was posting!)
 
kennysarmy said:
So an update.
The girl whose parents were going to be there have used this campsite many times and the owner knows their daughter, however they would like us to sign some sort if waiver!!!!
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Saying what exactly?
 
Yv said:
...for everything else, there is Mumsnet :naughty:
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Occasionally I'll click on that forum, it makes me realise how tame even the tweetypie section of TP is.....

Edit: I don't really see an issue with them going IMO at some point you need to show trust in your kids to know how to do the right thing...
 
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MWHCVT said:
Occasionally I'll click on that forum, it makes me realise how tame even the tweetypie section of TP is........
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god yes... I've had a starring role in one of those threads (or possibly netmums I forget which) as the "pathetic jobsworth ranger who refused to protect little darling from the attentions of an evil P**** photographer" - that is she wanted me to stop someone taking pictures of the beach on which said darling was playing, I said no because in my view he wasn't doing anything wrong - so she went home and slandered both me and him on the net instead... sigh. :rolleyes:
 
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big soft moose said:
god yes... I've had a starring role in one of those threads (or possibly netmums I forget which) as the "pathetic jobsworth ranger who refused to protect little darling from the attentions of an evil P**** photographer" - that is she wanted me to stop someone taking pictures of the beach on which said darling was playing, I said no because in my view he wasn't doing anything wrong - so she went hope and slandered both me and him on the net instead... sigh. :rolleyes:
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:lol: I wonder is there a TR6 forum and is my name mud on it :suspect:
 
MWHCVT said:
Occasionally I'll click on that forum, it makes me realise how tame even the tweetypie section of TP is.....

Edit: I don't really see an issue with them going IMO at some point you need to show trust in your kids to know how to do the right thing...
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And if they need an adult to help with anything?
 
kennysarmy said:
And if they need an adult to help with anything?
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they've got phones. at the end of the day though you've got to let her grow up sometime... in 24 months (or less) you'll have no choice. I'd also mention that when I was at uni the wildest girls most likely to make bad decisions (like going home with me ;) ) and/or take silly risks were the ones who'd been kept under close supervision by parents right up until they went to uni - on the whole the ones that had been given the freedom to make minor mistakes etc when they were younger were considerably less inclined to go nuts as soon as the opportunity presented.
 
kennysarmy said:
And if they need an adult to help with anything?
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8 x 16 y/o girls means there is likely 8 mobile phones, at least one of those will still have charge in them to call a parent....plus not every other no related adult in the world is evil most would you know help a young lady in need, I know I have several times...from giving them a lift if need, money for a bus home, you know talking to them, calming them down...
 
big soft moose said:
god yes... I've had a starring role in one of those threads (or possibly netmums I forget which) as the "pathetic jobsworth ranger who refused to protect little darling from the attentions of an evil P**** photographer" - that is she wanted me to stop someone taking pictures of the beach on which said darling was playing, I said no because in my view he wasn't doing anything wrong - so she went home and slandered both me and him on the net instead... sigh. :rolleyes:
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She might well have slandered you to her immediate friends. But if she did it online then it was libel.
 
viv1969 said:
She might well have slandered you to her immediate friends. But if she did it online then it was libel.
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sigh - does it matter

(oh and btw the 1952 defamation act defines "words disparaging a person in his office, calling or profession" as slander "whether written or spoken" )
 
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