Work leaving drinks etiquette

macs

macs

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Rich
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As a little bit of background: I'm leaving my current job next week and have arranged to meet people in a local pub for a few drinks to celebrate/say goodbye. The company I work for is ~15 staff in 2 offices and I've worked for the company for 7 years. I've worked in both offices. I was planning on bringing in cake on my last day.

Now my question: Is it good form to buy drinks for people who come?

Reading between the lines of what a couple of people have said in the office, they are expecting me to buy at least 1 drink for everyone. It was also implied that unless I arranged something I wasn't going to have any leaving drinks.

What are people's thoughts on this subject?
 
I'd say they should be buying you drinks - if they arent happy to come unless you pay i'd question why bother with them anyway

* apart from the blonde chick in accounts who you've always fancied but never had the nerve to put the moves on... clearly you should be buying her drinks ;)
 
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I work for a large company, we get a fair few people leaving. As such, everyone tends to arrange their own 'leaving drinks' so that sounds normal to me.
As for buying drinks, I guess it depends on the 'level' of employee you are and how you feel about everyone :) at low level that I am, if it was me leaving, I would not buy drinks as a default for everyone that turned up, however when management leave, they tend to buy a drink for people who do turn up. I work shift so usually it tends to be a load of cakes n stuff and thats it. (Very different form the 12 - passing out time we used to have when in London near many many pubs hehe)
 
I think it depends on the person, I'm the type of guy that would buy a round for everyone there in your situation lets face it it's not a massive team...but that's just me, to host is in my nature
 
In my work short term employees tend to just leave. For those who've been there a while (7 years would qualify) we normally have a collection and get them something and where possible have a meal somewhere at which everyone pays their own way. Leavers on these nights often buy a round for the others but this being Scotland that's not unusual anyway.
 
Steep said:
In my work short term employees tend to just leave. For those who've been there a while (7 years would qualify) we normally have a collection and get them something and where possible have a meal somewhere at which everyone pays their own way. Leavers on these nights often buy a round for the others but this being Scotland that's not unusual anyway.
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A collection is unlikely. My boss is a bit of a sour-puss and hates most things. He wouldn't arrange one and I don't think anyone else will even consider it.
 
It's getting harder at my place as well Rich, as the 'older' long term workers leave and newer folk don't stay long. Been there 8 1/2 years and I'm now the second longest time server.
 
My view is that I spend half my life working with folk I have no time for, have no respect for and can't be @rsed with. I get paid for that time but I'm buggered if I'm spending my own personal time in their company let alone buy them a drink.:D
 
Steep said:
It's getting harder at my place as well Rich, as the 'older' long term workers leave and newer folk don't stay long. Been there 8 1/2 years and I'm now the second longest time server.
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Yeah, i'm the 4th longest serving in the company here.

BRASH said:
My view is that I spend half my life working with folk I have no time for, have no respect for and can't be @rsed with. I get paid for that time but I'm buggered if I'm spending my own personal time in their company let alone buy them a drink.:D
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That's a very good point. I suspect that if I were 10 years younger and lived in the town where I work I'd probably be friends with them but as it is I'm not, and I don't, therefore I have very little in common with most of them.

Any idea how I can avoid buying a drink for people without simply saying "No, get your own"?

The MD usually sets up a tab at the bar when we go to this pub for Christmas meals etc so I think he would do that but I'm not sure if he'll do that for a leaving do
 
macs said:
That's a very good point. I suspect that if I were 10 years younger and lived in the town where I work I'd probably be friends with them but as it is I'm not, and I don't, therefore I have very little in common with most of them.

Any idea how I can avoid buying a drink for people without simply saying "No, get your own"?
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I'd personally and individually ask along the folk who I'd like to be there and sod the rest of them.
 
don't go ? ot sounds like you don't like them much anyway so its no loss
 
macs said:
A collection is unlikely. My boss is a bit of a sour-puss and hates most things. He wouldn't arrange one and I don't think anyone else will even consider it.
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With that in mind I would not arrange a meeting and I would not even consider arranging a meeting and not showing up :D

Cheers.
 
BRASH said:
I'd personally and individually ask along the folk who I'd like to be there and sod the rest of them.
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That would be my approach also. Im getting married in a couple of weeks, and out of a team of 18 people, ive only invited 9 to the evening reception/drinks because I only actually like those 9 people :D

I suppose I will not be looked at in the same way by some of the others, but they are not my kind of people anyway, so who cares :cool:
 
macs said:
Reading between the lines of what a couple of people have said in the office, they are expecting me to buy at least 1 drink for everyone. It was also implied that unless I arranged something I wasn't going to have any leaving drinks.

What are people's thoughts on this subject?
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The bit in bold really speaks volumes about their attitude towards you, so if I were you I wouldn't waste my time and money on them.
If there are any people who you would really like to say goodbye to, then arrange it on the quiet.
 
Hmmm, when I left my last job in London a couple of years back, I organised my own leaving drinks - no point anyone else trying to organise it, as no-one else knew everyone who needed to be invited (I'd worked in a couple of departments). I insisted on buying everyone a drink as they arrived. I would happily have paid the the whole night, but no-one would let me pay for a 2nd drink (there were about 60 there, so that saved me a bit of cash!). However, I genuinely liked everyone that came and was very sad to be leaving. In previous jobs usually someone else would arrange a team lunch out whenever someone was leaving, and everyone would pay their own way, but maybe with the person who was leaving buying a round of drinks for everyone.

I think that in your circumstances, if you're not that bothered about leaving drinks, I wouldn't have bothered arranging anything. Your co-workers don't seem that interested in bidding you farewell, only in getting a free drink. However, since it seems you've already arranged something, I'd probably buy the first drink and then leave it at that.
 
BRASH said:
My view is that I spend half my life working with folk I have no time for, have no respect for and can't be @rsed with. I get paid for that time but I'm buggered if I'm spending my own personal time in their company let alone buy them a drink.:D
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:plus1:
In my 38 years with the same company my opinion unfortunately is the same as Brash's

Now I'm getting worried, this is the second time I have agreed with you in as many days I must be mellowing! :eek:
 
I can count my true friends on one hand. These are colleagues and acquaintances at best and they'll forget all about you once you've gone.
Been there, done that.
 
AHILL said:
:plus1:
In my 38 years with the same company my opinion unfortunately is the same as Brash's

Now I'm getting worried, this is the second time I have agreed with you in as many days I must be mellowing! :eek:
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Fact is, as stated previously, you know I'm usually right:)
 
Its normal practice in my industry to buy a leaving drink. Last week 4 of us left, not only were we expected to buy people 4 drinks but also lay on some food. It's a very small industry and being tight isn't appreciated so that's the way it is, judge for yourself what harm not buying drinks might do you and decide accordingly.
Matt
 
To be fair it was just 1 guy who suggested that I should buy the drinks but no one else seemed to think it was a bad idea. I think he's quite a tight person and probably just wants a free drink.

Someone else left recently after only being here for 5 months and didn't get a leaving do so I thought I'd ask if I would have one as i've been here nearly 7 years. I asked "Am I getting any leaving drinks?" to which this one guy replied "I don't know, are you getting any leaving drinks?" with the emphasis on the "are you" so I replied with "isn't that what I just asked? Am I getting any leaving drinks?" with the emphasis on the "am I". It was clear that I was asking if someone was arranging drinks but he thought he would be clever by using the exact same words but with a slightly different inflection to suggest that I might want to get/buy the drinks.

I hate people who do that - use their knowledge to try and be clever and funny. Either you're funny or you're not, you shouldn't need to have to resort to linguistic willy waving!

I'm married with 2 small kids, the people in this office are either young and living in shared accommodation or older with grown up kids, so I fall in between 2 camps. Therefore I have little in common with most people I work with. When I was at the other office there were a couple of people who were the same age and had similar 'life experiences' as me.
 
f**k em! At my place seems everyone makes a huge thing of birthdays, I turned 40 last June, not a mention of it. saved a fortune on not buying everyone cakes though! Quite honestly it didn't bother me, I found it quite amusing!
 
I've usually left by the simple expedient of telling the boss to go forth and multiply or similar so have never had a leaving do! My wife has had a couple though and was unable to buy a drink at any of them and the last one also involved a good meal which neither of us could contribute towards. The one before that, she got 2 lovely plants in good pots as well as a decent sum of cash (over £200) as a token of their appreciation of her efforts over the years she had been there.

If the OP wants to go for a few beers, do but don't be pressured into doing anything you don't want to do. If it's a job where you may be needing favours in the future, it may be worth buying a few drinks but probably not - if people are professional enough to be needed, they should be professional enough to not need buttering up!
 
I see it simply, if these are colleagues of equal footing you can all buy your own drinks. If however there is a team that have worked for you for a number of years and helped you do well then it's nice to say thanks with a round of drinks. Same goes for your boss if you'd done well for him it's nice if he puts in an appearance and buys you a drink.

On the other hand if your some weird anti-social who hates absolutely everyone you work with then don't have leaving drinks!
 
We if I'd worked with someone for seven years I'd expect to dip into my pocket to buy a leaving present for them. As a nice gesture you could consider putting some money behind the bar but no one should be forcing you to - especially the price of drinks these days! Depends how flush you are
 
I say it would come down to if you were a senior staff member (eg director or department manager) or a "rank and file" staff member - the former would probably be on a good salary and likely moving to a job with an even better salary so would probably be expected to splash the cash on buying drinks, wheras the latter would probably not really be "expected" to buy drinks for others.
 
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