what do you do when you are pinching a loaf?

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joescrivens

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I always take my phone to the toilet and used to surf the net whilst having a poo.

My brother in law reads a book, but now I have Football Manager 2012 on my iphone so I spend my dump playing that.

How do you pass this special time?
 
LOL!!! :D

I sometimes take a mug of coffee and a smoke to the loo. I always have my iPhone and browse this forum.

I'm pretty sure it's a bloke thing because SWIMBO doesn't understand!!

Andy
 
Dump. It only takes a minute.
 
i am still asleep and this thread is not really here?? please tell me i am right. :puke:
 
nilagin said:
Dump. It only takes a minute.
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ahhh, a novice.

Having a poo is a very special time for a man to get away from everyone else in the house. You will learn as you get older to savour it and make it last.

It's man time!!
 
our loo's are so full of womens mags I get to catch up on all the latest gossip with ashley and jorden and the rest of them.

spike

p.s do not have an iphone so mags it is
 
joescrivens said:
How do you pass this special time?
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Cryptic crossword or latest photography mag. Now I have an iPhone i expect I'll be playing angry birds on silent mode in the works khazi.

Also is there an award for best thread title ? I nominate this one! :lol:
 
joescrivens said:
ahhh, a novice.

Having a poo is a very special time for a man to get away from everyone else in the house. You will learn as you get older to savour it and make it last.

It's man time!!
Click to expand...
I'm 49. All the time is man time. You obviously don't wear the trousers in your household if you need to hide in the loo.
 
nilagin said:
I'm 49. All the time is man time. You obviously don't wear the trousers in your household if you need to hide in the loo.
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actually, it's more that I put the rest of my family first :thumbs:

apart from loo time :lol:
 
for me its just go in do my thing and come out couple of mins max i dont want to be spending half hour in there smelling my own turd

besides which theres only me and my little boy in the house anyway
 
Book reader here.
 
astraman1 said:
for me its just go in do my thing and come out couple of mins max i dont want to be spending half hour in there smelling my own turd

besides which theres only me and my little boy in the house anyway
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theres something satisfying about the smell of your own turd, don't you think?

i can't stand other peoples farts, but I don't mind my own at all.
 
Lots of back copies (and the current issue) of Viz is reserved for this!

Often food mags too.
 
It is a very special time indeed. I find the iPad is very useful in the John for looking through forums, Facebook and playing games :)
 
cambsno said:
Lots of back copies (and the current issue) of Viz is reserved for this!
Click to expand...

that's more like it. If ever there was a publication suited to sitting in the 'contemplation pit', then this is it.

Roger's Profanisaurus is the dogs :thumbs:
 
joescrivens said:
I always take my phone to the toilet and used to surf the net whilst having a poo.

My brother in law reads a book, but now I have Football Manager 2012 on my iphone so I spend my dump playing that.
Click to expand...

Better be careful you don't inadvertently invent the IWipe :gag:
 
Apparently the queen has been on the throne for the last sixty years. I wonder what she does?
 
neil_g said:
usually im trying to plan how to get a new roll from the other bathroom after someone used the current one up and didnt replace it..

:gag:
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Been there.

There's a kind of two legged hop that you only do when there are chaufonts between your cheeks.
 
nilagin said:
I'm 49. All the time is man time. You obviously don't wear the trousers in your household if you need to hide in the loo.
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to be fair they are probably round his ankles at the time.

I don't go for all this man wears the trousers business, its the 21st century its nice to get bossed about every now and again, women want to be equal and treated equally... well that is true to a point but funny how it changes to suit them if it means manning the liferafts on italian cruise ships then it goes back to titanic rules.
 
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joescrivens said:
There's a kind of two legged hop that you only do when there are chaufonts between your cheeks.
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I think you mean chalfonts, as in chalfont saint giles. And even then I think tag-nuts is what you really mean.
See aforementioned Profanisaurus for details.
 
DorsetDude said:
I think you mean chalfonts, as in chalfont saint giles. And even then I think tag-nuts is what you really mean.
See aforementioned Profanisaurus for details.
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yes thats right, i was having a poo at the time nd not paying attention to my spelling :)
 
Pooling is the correct term I believe :)
 
I make sure I keep the "rest room" topped up with Computer Active and PC Format magazines. I may also throw in the odd copy of The Beano.
Actually, funnily enough but it is also where most of my best inspirations for my cartoon drawing occurs.

This thread is funny, it's making me grin a lot.
 
I always wear a baseball cap when bog bashing.
 
Daily paper and pen for the crossword.
 
gumbo-67 said:
i am still asleep and this thread is not really here?? please tell me i am right. :puke:
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I'm with you on this! I just looked at the thread because I thought it had some historical significance - like folk being reported to Oz for stealing a loaf of bread! How wrong was I?. ;-(
 
I wonder how many subscribers on this thread are male rather than female :thinking:
 
luckychip said:
I'm with you on this! I just looked at the thread because I thought it had some historical significance - like folk being reported to Oz for stealing a loaf of bread! How wrong was I?. ;-(
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exactly what I thought, someone tea leafing loafs of bread :D
 
what happens if the train does not leave the station? :)
 
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