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Things kids say....
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Both my abiding memories of the things my kids said were, I'm afraid, toilet humour 
My eldest, when about 3 or 4 was taken to the loo in a motorway services by her father. While he waited by the cubicle door, she said in a very loud voice "Daddy, why is that naughty man weeing in the sink?" The poor chap had awful problems aiming straight due to the fact he really was peeing himself laughing.
She was only topped by her younger sister, who at 3 years old attended the wedding of my best friend. I was a bridesmaid so was stood at the front of the church, while the kids sat with dad, near the back so if they were noisy they wouldn't disturb anyone. HAH!! So much for that grand plan. Just as the vicar is telling a hushed church about the sanctity of marriage, youngest shouts "MUM, I need a poo!!" Ground, hole, swallow me, NOW please!!!
My eldest, when about 3 or 4 was taken to the loo in a motorway services by her father. While he waited by the cubicle door, she said in a very loud voice "Daddy, why is that naughty man weeing in the sink?" The poor chap had awful problems aiming straight due to the fact he really was peeing himself laughing.
She was only topped by her younger sister, who at 3 years old attended the wedding of my best friend. I was a bridesmaid so was stood at the front of the church, while the kids sat with dad, near the back so if they were noisy they wouldn't disturb anyone. HAH!! So much for that grand plan. Just as the vicar is telling a hushed church about the sanctity of marriage, youngest shouts "MUM, I need a poo!!" Ground, hole, swallow me, NOW please!!!
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My parents' other child once announced loudly to our very Victorian Grandmother that "When I grow up, I want to rub people and make them feel better - a prostitute." I should explain that Dad had a cousin who was a physiotherapist and that someone had got their long "P" words mixed up.
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Continuing the confused words idea.
When our son was about 8 we had our first conservatory built. He was quite taken with the whole idea - holes being dug, walls built etc.
He may have heard us talking about what we were going to put in it but one day I asked him where he was going and he said, "I'm going into the confurniture."
Dave
PS. Terri, can I ask how old your daughter is?
When our son was about 8 we had our first conservatory built. He was quite taken with the whole idea - holes being dug, walls built etc.
He may have heard us talking about what we were going to put in it but one day I asked him where he was going and he said, "I'm going into the confurniture."
Dave
PS. Terri, can I ask how old your daughter is?
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ozanan
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I was 2 years old when I went to see my newborn baby brother in hospital and asked why he was in a fish tank. I know now that it was a perspex cot and not a fish tank.
An old teacher of mine told me how he was in his garden when he stopped his 4 year old daughter from eating a worm, then with a sense of dread asked her "What do they taste like?" She replied "A bit like slugs only longer."
An old teacher of mine told me how he was in his garden when he stopped his 4 year old daughter from eating a worm, then with a sense of dread asked her "What do they taste like?" She replied "A bit like slugs only longer."
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I was completely inappropriate when about 3, which was back in 1976/7....
I kind of remember some of it, but think my memory has been embellished by the retold tales to embarrass me over the years. Basically back in the 70's Norfolkshire did not have a large ethnic community (still doesn't!) - and on a bus with mum going to Grandparents the biggest , what's this weeks PC term, black dude, with the worlds biggest afro got on.. it was seriously mega afro hair... and yes, I do remember him... now I had not seen any afro-american / african gentleman before and was most excited by the "real live golly***"
The good part of the story was he was totally cool and funny about it.. remember him patting me on the head (or was it slapping me?")
I kind of remember some of it, but think my memory has been embellished by the retold tales to embarrass me over the years. Basically back in the 70's Norfolkshire did not have a large ethnic community (still doesn't!) - and on a bus with mum going to Grandparents the biggest , what's this weeks PC term, black dude, with the worlds biggest afro got on.. it was seriously mega afro hair... and yes, I do remember him... now I had not seen any afro-american / african gentleman before and was most excited by the "real live golly***"
The good part of the story was he was totally cool and funny about it.. remember him patting me on the head (or was it slapping me?")
I took my then 19yr old daughter to see swan lake for birthday. At the end a gentleman walked onto the stage. She said out load is that the composer.
When I was younger out shopping with my mum. The tons of dog food were going though the scanner. When I said 'no not meat pie again'
When I was younger out shopping with my mum. The tons of dog food were going though the scanner. When I said 'no not meat pie again'
DavieW
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Not what he said more what he did - my nephew when he was 2 or 3, cut his middle finger near the nail. We met my brother and his family at a café and asked to see his sore finger so he promptly lifted his hand, turned it over and raised his middle finger.
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My son and I are pulling out of a side road at a tee junction.
'Danny lean back will you I can't see left passed your big hair!'
Danny, 'Yeah well, I can't see right passed your big nose'
'Danny lean back will you I can't see left passed your big hair!'
Danny, 'Yeah well, I can't see right passed your big nose'
TopBanana
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My 3 year old calls shampoo "showerpoo" as you use it in the shower. I think it's quite cute so haven't made much effort to correct her.
When she was first learning to speak she couldn't say many people's names properly, so we have lots of funny name variants. My favourite is calling her uncle Murray "murrygold".
When she was first learning to speak she couldn't say many people's names properly, so we have lots of funny name variants. My favourite is calling her uncle Murray "murrygold".