They Are at it Again!!

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http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/wor...-marigolds-to-rise-because-of-bonkers-EU.html

OK, I could blither on about little men/women in european offices looking for things to regulate, but frankly that just repeats stuff seen all over the internet. So, instead, I issue the good folks of TP a challenge.... we need a list of suggestions to send to Brussels of things that must surely need some kind of regulation :D :naughty:


I would start, but my common sense function has broken it's off switch, so forgive me, I will repair it and come back to you with a few ideas.
 
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Yv, I just read this on another site!
My Gast is flabbered.
 
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Cameras!

Obviously if we cannot stop the possibility of someone's photograph capturing the image of someone else's precious little darling in the background, all digital cameras sold within the EU must be permanently linked to a central database where the images can be individually viewed and scanned!

The forthcoming digital photography license can pay for the ongoing monitoring!
 
I think they should standardise speed limits and road signage across the EU. All these open borders yet often big differences in the above.
 
Loo-roll - I think they should regulate how thick it is, how wide, how many plys it should have and how long each piece is too. They could also regulate how many perforations there are between each sheet and how much force is required to tear them, as well as what type of cardboard is used for the tube ... well they are full of shhhhhhh :p
 
PaulButler said:
Loo-roll - I think they should regulate how thick it is, how wide, how many plys it should have and how long each piece is too. They could also regulate how many perforations there are between each sheet and how much force is required to tear them, as well as what type of cardboard is used for the tube ... well they are full of shhhhhhh :p
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And that it MUST be put on the holder in a "rolling over the top" fashion :-)
 
Colours...Only the colours of the rainbow and shades thereafter are required.

Things like mauve, magenta, oatmeal, aqua favoured by haberdasheries should be investigated and outlawed immediately by the EU.
 
AndyB1976 said:
Colours...Only the colours of the rainbow and shades thereafter are required.

Things like mauve, magenta, oatmeal, aqua favoured by haberdasheries should be investigated and outlawed immediately by the EU.
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Oh no, that would never do.

All colours are acceptable, as long as they comply to the strict controls implemented by the European Commission of Colour, under the directorate of the Board of Control of Visual Stimulation.

Every shade must meet and exceed the commissions guidelines, as laid out in the 7000 page document, "The European Directive on the Aesthetics of the Environment as applied to domestic and public spaces, with special regard to the commercial exploitation of visual perception."

Section 4
 
PaulButler said:
Loo-roll - I think they should regulate how thick it is, how wide, how many plys it should have and how long each piece is too. They could also regulate how many perforations there are between each sheet and how much force is required to tear them, as well as what type of cardboard is used for the tube ... well they are full of shhhhhhh :p
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And it must be tested for its ability to deal with vindaloo ... and all vindaloos eaten in the EU must be regulated to ensure they're not too strong for EU loo roll!

Obviously Phal curries will be outlawed at the same time!
 
Biros....the ink tube should not exceed a size which would prevent exploration of the inner ear and must conform to a non sharp edge grading system....likewise the same should apply to paper clips.....

After thought: biros should also be adaptable for belly button fluff removal
 
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Just another reason we need to GTF out of Europe and away from these muppets.
 
And it must be tested for its ability to deal with vindaloo
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And thats another problem...Whatever happened to the Curry Ringstinger Accreditation Policy? I mean if you have a vindaloo in Uxbridge, is it the same as in Southall?
Although to be fair, the chicken Madras I had in Belgium, was more like chicken stew, so it could lead to a downgrading in that great British staple food!
 
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All mens socks should be a standard colour and the same size - think of the hours pairing them up takes.
 
Mine already are!
 
Same here but it should be a law - like many others 'laws' a job creation scheme
 
My feet are different sizes tho.
 
Ricardodaforce said:
I think they should standardise speed limits and road signage across the EU. All these open borders yet often big differences in the above.
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Me too. With the system they have in Germany.

I think they should regulate watches. Only self winding or wind up mechanical movements should be allowed on people's wrists.
 
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All EU countries should drive on the left. Most of us are right handed so sitting on the right side of the car to drive is clearly more natural.

Being largely right handed this arrangement makes it easier to get your sword hand out of the window if you need to deal with any ne'er-do-wells or rapscallions (probably immigrants) you meet along the way.

This would be a huge and economically useful job creation scheme re-designing roads and erecting new signs.

Dave
 
ST4 said:
Me too. With the system they have in Germany.

I think they should regulate watches. Only self winding or wind up mechanical movements should be allowed on people's wrists.
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I have several battery powered watches that are far more accurate than the self winding one I am wearing - and a few that are solar powered to boot.

Surprised that Brash is bothered - fairly sure he doesn't use Marigolds or oven gloves!
 
Nod said:
I have several battery powered watches that are far more accurate than the self winding one I am wearing - and a few that are solar powered to boot.

Surprised that Brash is bothered - fairly sure he doesn't use Marigolds or oven gloves!
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I am sure they are, but you can use a phone for accuracy. An automatic movement is a thing of wonder and real craftsmanship.
 
Well, they should scrap the current CAP that costs us all money and pays for food to be wasted...

and replace with CAP v2 - the Camera Acquisition Policy - whereby after 1 year of camera ownership you can upgrade to the model above for a £10 admin fee, along with massively subsidised lenses (80%) discounts, and this can only be redeemed via TP classified section.
 
ST4 said:
I am sure they are, but you can use a phone for accuracy. An automatic movement is a thing of wonder and real craftsmanship.
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Yes, because mobile phones are renowned for their accuracy and reliability in all things. :rolleyes:
 
ST4 said:
I am sure they are, but you can use a phone for accuracy. An automatic movement is a thing of wonder and real craftsmanship.
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Compared to the radio controlled clocks and watches, my phone is a few minutes slow. I'll agree that a watch movement is a lovely piece of kinetic sculpture though.
 
I don't see the problem here. Surely you want our English kitchen glove and oven glove manufacturers to be able to sell all ove the EU knowing their gloves comply with the local standards? And don't you want to know that the gloves you buy are safe and fit for purpose wherever they were manufactured?
 
sphexx said:
I don't see the problem here. Surely you want our English kitchen glove and oven glove manufacturers to be able to sell all ove the EU knowing their gloves comply with the local standards? And don't you want to know that the gloves you buy are safe and fit for purpose wherever they were manufactured?
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Errrr nope :-)
 
Umm.. so what's actually *new*?

We've had British Standards for the safety of oven gloves, etc. for decades (as a quick search online reveals). Could it be that British Manufacturers have been ignoring the British Standards for all this time and it's taken the EU to actually point out that knowing an oven glove used to pick-up a roasting pan at 240C is actually capable of protecting your hands from that level of heat?

British Standard 6526:1998 – ‘Domestic oven gloves – Requirements and test methods’

And when you look at the actual test method, guess what.. it's another British Standard that apparently British manufacturers have been ignoring (if we believe the articles that say all this extra testing is only now going to start costing more)..

BS 7305:1990 – ‘Method for the determination of the maximum safe ironing temperature of fabrics’
(sounds off-topic, but this is also the test standard for oven gloves)


I've only recently become involved in CE marking projects with UK manufacturers (no oven glove manufacturers yet, but if you're reading this I can help..) and it's been quite an eye opener at just how many products you buy, expect to do a job and that might result in a nasty injury if they're not up to scratch have absolutely no validation or effectiveness testing done on them at all.

And there are EU-derived grants for manufacturers that need to do this testing, or there were (the funding pot is getting low).. the government needs to get its finger out and make the calls necessary to get the funding pots topped up.
 
Just don't use Marigolds as oven gloves
Or oven gloves for washing up thats all!

Is there a Law against that?
No? well there damned well should be (y)
 
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Alastair said:
Umm.. so what's actually *new*?

We've had British Standards for the safety of oven gloves, etc. for decades (as a quick search online reveals). Could it be that British Manufacturers have been ignoring the British Standards for all this time and it's taken the EU to actually point out that knowing an oven glove used to pick-up a roasting pan at 240C is actually capable of protecting your hands from that level of heat?

British Standard 6526:1998 – ‘Domestic oven gloves – Requirements and test methods’

And when you look at the actual test method, guess what.. it's another British Standard that apparently British manufacturers have been ignoring (if we believe the articles that say all this extra testing is only now going to start costing more)..

BS 7305:1990 – ‘Method for the determination of the maximum safe ironing temperature of fabrics’
(sounds off-topic, but this is also the test standard for oven gloves)


I've only recently become involved in CE marking projects with UK manufacturers (no oven glove manufacturers yet, but if you're reading this I can help..) and it's been quite an eye opener at just how many products you buy, expect to do a job and that might result in a nasty injury if they're not up to scratch have absolutely no validation or effectiveness testing done on them at all.

And there are EU-derived grants for manufacturers that need to do this testing, or there were (the funding pot is getting low).. the government needs to get its finger out and make the calls necessary to get the funding pots topped up.
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This is TP.....Please refrain from the use of facts.
Thank you.
:-)
 
sphexx said:
I don't see the problem here. Surely you want our English kitchen glove and oven glove manufacturers to be able to sell all ove the EU knowing their gloves comply with the local standards? And don't you want to know that the gloves you buy are safe and fit for purpose wherever they were manufactured?
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I was just going to post something similar.

Silly EU getting involved, it's not like using oven gloves that aren't up to standard can cause injury or anything :rolleyes:.

We should be allowed to burn ourselves as much as we like without the EU trying to prevent unscrupulous manufacturers selling substandard goods ;).
 
I can't believe someone's being told off for NOT using banter!!! :lol:
 
crofter said:
EU banter (if there is such a thing ) or British standard banter ?
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Bloody foreign banter, coming over here....ruining our good old traditional banter!!!
 
  • Italian: scherzi bonari
Portuguese: brincadeira
  • Spanish: bromas
 
Nod said:
  • European Spanish: bromas Et al
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And just like our swear words, there is no decent equivalent in these languages.
There should be a law passed, that the British Banter and swearwords should be the
"standards" to which all Jonny foreigners seek to achieve.
We are the best and they know it (y)
 
ChasG said:
All mens socks should be a standard colour and the same size - think of the hours pairing them up takes.
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All socks should be sold in three's for the inevitable of one going missing......scratch that, far too sensible.
 
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