Tell me your best 'put downs'

Trev4

Trev4

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Trev
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What’s your best put down for unwanted attention when your togging. You know the scenario, you have set your gear up, put out your bribes for the wild life, or what ever your taking, and then they arrive.

The face appears over your shoulder followed by, “What camera is that then?” or similar opening lines... And then it goes on.
When they have got round to asking you if you have seen anything yet, they proceed to tell you that they have a really good camera, :shrug: its got a million times zoom etc..."Look", they say, "I always keep it in my shirt pocket".
After glancing at their pride and joy for maybe a nanosecond, a tiny camera from Samsotronic that came free with a packet of cornflakes, you look up in time to see your bait disappearing in the mouth of the thing you came to get pictures of. To rub salt in the wound, they then tell you that "you have missed a good shot there!"
Ahhhhhh. :eek::eek::gag: And then they go on and on for the next ten minutes telling you what your doing wrong, not taking the hint that you dont want to talk.

The words ****off don’t seem enough, the thought about nailing them to the ground and using them as bait for maybe a larger predator is maybe a little bit illegal, but oh so satisfying. :naughty:
Yes, it happened to me last weekend, Twice!!

I did look at one of their little cameras, then at my 400mm lens, and mentioned that it was law that the size of the lens was in proportion to the wedding tackle of the toggger, but that went over his head. I don’t know how that reply would work for the ladies on here though. :nuts:

So guys, what’s your best put down for these people, I am sure with the high quality of TP members there must be many ways to treat them.
All suggestions are welcome :wave:
 
Tell them no matter how good the camera is it is the fleshy bit of skin under the nail that presses the shutter button that makes the different and yours is a zillion times better than theirs :D
 
Or you could say "I like my Canon 7d, But then I like your Samsotronic, so which is best? there is only one way to find out...........FIGHT" :lol:
 
i don't generally get pestered. perhaps i dont look friendly enough :shrug:

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:lol: loving the replies so far lol

i dont feel the need to do put me downs tbh... i normally get "oh nice camera was that expensive" just nosey people really.....

If im alone i tend to run quick incase they are thinking of mugging me :lol: however im normally with tthe spaniel soo im not totally alone lol
 
woah! that camera looks like a toy in your hands, you need at least a 300mm prime!
 
its a gripped D200 :lol:

i suppose i am a bit of a unit :D
 
eeeh, I tend to be polite to them as long as they're not being too much of a pain in the rear... once they've gone 'I've got a d40, really like it....' and I've done the generic 'ah yeah I used to have one, cool camera, I really liked it'...the conversation usually dries up and leaves me to get on with my work...
 
enquire if they enjoy sex and travel at the same time
 
DM's, braces, shaved head and a snarl works for me. I don't get too much hassle:D
 
Only ever had one situation like this..

Ned - Aw rite there m8, whits that gear worth.

Me in a very calm cold voice - More than your life.

He left and i never found out what he really wanted to discuss.
 
If somebody was annoying me that much I'd just say "F*** O**" :shrug:
I don't have the ability or energy for small talk, so they would just be wasting their time approaching me :D
 
Only ever had 2 people talk to me while I was out shooting, and one was another tog.

A Canadian taking long exposures of a waterfall. I was taking a photo over a busy road, he shouted when it was clear.

had a good natter for 10 mins, I admired his images, he liked my bear image and we went on our way.

The 2nd was a chav in a park, asking how much it was worth etc while everything that I answered resulted in, "yeah my dads is better than that". I told him that I'd better get the shot before the light went and he carried on and then went to touch my camera. Grabbed his hand and told him that if he didn't **** off i'd start taking photos of his colon. He soon shot off and me and his dad had a laugh about it in the pub 2 days later :D
 
Some great replies there guys, thanks. I did think about continuing the conversation by discussing how long my prison sentence was for pushing the leg of a tripod down someones neck :suspect:, could work you know :lol:
Thanks again and any more thoughts :)
 
I don`t answer and appear ignorant, very easy..........:D
 
I don't get bothered except for one time where a woman, in the town I live, asked if I was a tourist because I had that round my neck. People where I live don't treat you like a freak for owning a bit of camera gear that is clearly a step above your average point and shoot. It's only when I go to Glasgow and other places that I notice the looks.
 
"oh well hi there - no really i shoot fashion, oh my, but my luuvy editor gave me this sooo good assignment , over soon if you'd luuuuv a teeennie drink

oh dont run away luuvy!!
 
oh, and standard response for 'what tv station are you from' or 'what newspaper are you from' (I get both when shooting both stills and video - people (idiots?) seem incapable of telling what sort of big camera is what, or fathoming that you don't usually need microphones to take a photo)... generic answer is 'press' 'sky news' 'getty' or 'the sun'.

'uh take my picture mate' point camera in their rough direction, tap the test flash button, walk away silently.

Have had douchetards come up 'uh what you shoot, uh yeah, I use a D3x for work' pffft good for you mate, yeah, well, I wouldn't want to be using the H4D in this kind of enviroment, not got the iso performance.... *walk away*
 
"Lo siento pero no hablo ingles. Que?" :lol

A few times when out and about, (esp with the 120-400 bolted on0, heard quite a few "oh thats a big camera, that must take good pictures." - Noticably up north norfolk just after xmas when the seals were all pupping and every TD&H were there with their camera phones......

:shrug:
 
Thanks for your replies and ideas. Being a luvvie could either work or get you thumped :lol: and "Lo siento pero no hablo ingles. Que?" sounds spot on, if only I could pronounce it :D
Cheers guys :thumbs:
 
Trev4 said:
The words ****off don’t seem enough, the thought about nailing them to the ground and using them as bait for maybe a larger predator is maybe a little bit illegal, but oh so satisfying. :naughty:
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What a mild-mannered and considered approach you have to dealing with life and people in general - well done, you must feel very proud of yourself.....

Things are going down the pan fast on this forum....
 
"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Is that a banana in your pocket or a just a massive cock?"
 
specialman said:
What a mild-mannered and considered approach you have to dealing with life and people in general - well done, you must feel very proud of yourself.....

Things are going down the pan fast on this forum....
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Do you think your maybe being a little serious about a light hearted thread thats meant to give us a chance to add some humour to our lives :)
 
I always hope that I meet another togger...........a serious one that is, not someone with a cameraphone etc. Who knows, could be a fellow TP member.
 
I've only ever been approached by another photographer while out, and he had a waaaay better lens than me *cries*
 
NigelPaul said:
I always hope that I meet another togger...........a serious one that is, not someone with a cameraphone etc. Who knows, could be a fellow TP member.
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Got to agree there, at least a fellow TP member would join in and let you get on with taking pics, so yes, the company would be welcome then.
 
surfinrach90 said:
I've only ever been approached by another photographer while out, and he had a waaaay better lens than me *cries*
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Rachel, just tell him its nothing to do with size, its what you do with it that matters, photographically that is ;)
 
I think Kenny Everett said it best.........Round em up, put em in a field and bomb the *******s

It's all in the best possible taste.....


:cool:
 
It annoys me greatly when I'm out and about with my camera and I get people going "Nice camera mate!" or "Take my picture would you?". Yes, it is a nice camera. Get your own. No, I won't take your picture, you're missing teeth and work at the fag counter in Sainsburys. **** off!
 
specialman said:
...Things are going down the pan fast on this forum....
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Aww, come on Pat... That's a bit uncalled for! ;)

It's a light-hearted thread and I daresay we've all had at least one numpty come up to us when we've been out.

I had the misfortune of having some gobby little shell-suited dole scrounging scrote come up to me once. He shoved his face in front of my lens screaming at me to "c'mon mate... take my f*****g picture will ya?"

My reply... "I need to ring NASA before I do"

When he asked what for, I told him that I needed a more powerful computer to try and make his ugly mug look human and that NASA was the only place I could get one... Needless to say, the dopey git decided to bristle but I'm six-foot-one, seventeen-and-a-half stone and have a problem with suffering fools gladly... He took the hint! :D
 
Being of similar size and build to Adam, I rarely get comments shouted my way, and if they are the tend to be more about my weight than the usual camera rubbish, I have over the years developed a fail safe reply.

"I'm only fat because every time I F*** your mum she gives me a biscuit"

Works esp. well with groups of them, as the mates tend to laugh more at the idiot shouting abuse, and lets me get on with what i am doing.
 
"Why are you taking pictures, mate?"


"It's a matter of security............social security"



They usually naff off pretty sharpish at that point :D
 
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