Suggestions on answering text message

2blue4u

2blue4u

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Suggestions invited for replying to a misdirected text message.

"Hi, how much do you charge for a fulm body swedish with a head and face massage pls and how long would this be? X"


I'm so tempted to ask for their photo first. I hope the sender is female at least :oops: :$
 
If the request was from a female. I would simply charge a small massage in return.
 
My regular masseur (yeah, I'm that posh) is all booked up this week so I've been texting other people trying to get something organised. The "massage services" page on Gumtree is a pretty scary place.
 
Taking my cue from Cheers I think you should text back...

" The massage will be free as I'm struggling to build up trade since the incident and the national press coverage. And by the way the police couldn't prove anything."
 
MWHCVT said:
To be terribly conventional but why do you have to try and funny, why not just respond with "sorry but you've got the wrong number"
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Where's the fun in that!?!? ;)

Many years ago my parents, who lived in Lancashire,used to get regular phone calls from Scotland (can't remember the exact location) wanting a taxi. It was usually late evenings for folk wanting to go home :beer:
After a few times saying they'd dialled the wrong number (& always saying the same if a female rang) he just said aye, we'll be there. :D
 
Best so far.
woof woof said:
"The massage will be free as I'm struggling to build up trade since the incident and the national press coverage. And by the way the police couldn't prove anything."
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FAIL! On every level :(
MWHCVT said:
To be terribly conventional but why do you have to try and funny, why not just respond with "sorry but you've got the wrong number"
Click to expand...

A chance for some fun. I usually have my serious head on when we, mistakenly, receive phone callers expecting to talk about their order for comfy old persons shoes.
 
MWHCVT said:
To be terribly conventional but why do you have to try and funny, why not just respond with "sorry but you've got the wrong number"
Click to expand...

Because then the person will realise their error, resend the text to the right person and somebody running a small business may just make a few quid for providing a service.

And where, as they say, is the fun in that?
 
ha ha, many years ago I had a student holiday job at a local geotechnical engineers. Our number was one digit difference from the local VW dealership.

Me: "Good afternoon, Xxxxxx & Co, Geotechincal engineers"
Them: "I'd like to book my golf in for a service please."
Me: "Sorry. You have the wrong number, you need to redial xxxxxx"
Them: "I said I want to book my golf in for a service"
Me: "Sorry. You have the wrong number, you need to redial xxxxxx"
Them: "I said I want to book my golf in for a service"
Me: "Certainly Sir. 8.30am, next Thursday. Is that a full service, or part service? Would you like a minibus lift to the city centre, or.. hang on, we still have 3 coutersy cars left. They are polo's I am afraid, but still a nice car."

Would love to have been a fly on the wall the next Thurs am.

This happened more than once.

Unfortunately no was also one off the Samaritains. Never got a call for someone in need. Thankfully!
 
JonathanRyan said:
Because then the person will realise their error, resend the text to the right person and somebody running a small business may just make a few quid for providing a service.

And where, as they say, is the fun in that?
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Exactly this. Fair enough to have a joke with then if/when it happens all the time. Otherwise it is just bad taste at best.

I honestly can't see the funny side in it.
 
Lynton said:
ha ha, many years ago I had a student holiday job at a local geotechnical engineers. Our number was one digit difference from the local VW dealership.

Me: "Good afternoon, Xxxxxx & Co, Geotechincal engineers"
Them: "I'd like to book my golf in for a service please."
Me: "Sorry. You have the wrong number, you need to redial xxxxxx"
Them: "I said I want to book my golf in for a service"
Me: "Sorry. You have the wrong number, you need to redial xxxxxx"
Them: "I said I want to book my golf in for a service"
Me: "Certainly Sir. 8.30am, next Thursday. Is that a full service, or part service? Would you like a minibus lift to the city centre, or.. hang on, we still have 3 coutersy cars left. They are polo's I am afraid, but still a nice car."

Would love to have been a fly on the wall the next Thurs am.

This happened more than once.

Unfortunately no was also one off the Samaritains. Never got a call for someone in need. Thankfully!
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Have you ever made a journey for nothing to your dealers? Perhaps taken time off work for it, arranged granny to take the children to school etc. Yes sure you'd love to be a fly on the wall and hear about other peoples misery caused by you? Hmmm
 
Just delete.
 
dean messenger said:
think a few people around here have had a humour bypass
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Or just have a different view of what is funny. I don't think messing with someone else livelyhood is remotely funny, nor is purposely incoveniencing people. If you honestly think that is just a laugh and represents humour well more fool you.
 
dejongj said:
Or just have a different view of what is funny. I don't think messing with someone else livelyhood is remotely funny, nor is purposely incoveniencing people. If you honestly think that is just a laugh and represents humour well more fool you.
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no what i actually think is that stupid people who when told several times they have the wrong number totally ignore whats been said to them they deserve everything coming to them.
but clearly that part went totally over your head and you clearly failed to see the blatantly obviously stupidity of the caller.
add to that as someone who also underwent emergency life saving surgery and ended up with a colostomy bag, if it wasnt for "crap" jokes , pranks and bowel humour i would never have got through it.
laugh and the world laughs with you. cry and you wet your face.
 
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Oh I have plenty of laughs don't you worry. They are not purposely at the expense of other people though.
 
dejongj said:
Have you ever made a journey for nothing to your dealers? Perhaps taken time off work for it, arranged granny to take the children to school etc. Yes sure you'd love to be a fly on the wall and hear about other peoples misery caused by you? Hmmm
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As mentioned , I did repeat the company name and offered the correct phone no! Several times!
 
Our old office phone number was a digit different to the local tourist information place, we'd regularly tell callers that they'd got the wrong number but then offer some real advice from the locals - I used to enjoy recommending places to eat, visit, park etc!
 
Lynton said:
As mentioned , I did repeat the company name and offered the correct phone no! Several times!
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Granted the person could not or would not take the information in but the line of least "damage" would have been to say no appointments available please call again in a couple of weeks.

Sometimes and I am not saying any of the above examples fall into this catagory but some humourous interactions can sound malicious when retold to others because 'we' were not there to appreciate the context and nor does everyone share the same sense of humour ;)
 
OldCarlos said:
Where's the fun in that!?!? ;)

Many years ago my parents, who lived in Lancashire,used to get regular phone calls from Scotland (can't remember the exact location) wanting a taxi. It was usually late evenings for folk wanting to go home :beer:
After a few times saying they'd dialled the wrong number (& always saying the same if a female rang) he just said aye, we'll be there. :D
Click to expand...

My parents also lived in Lancashire, and a posh new restaurant opened about 3 miles away. Phone numbers were nothing like each other, but calls for the restaurant kept coming to my parents.
BT wouldn't do anything about it as parent's phone number was OK. Restaurant wouldn't do anything about it because they didn't believe there was a problem.
Parents started taking "bookings" - Saturday night bookings for a table of four were very popular! After a couple of months restaurant got uppity. They sorted out the phone problem and left my parents in peace.
 
"Hi, how much do you charge for a fulm body swedish with a head and face massage pls and how long would this be? X"

Hi thanks for contacting John's Motors. For a full body we'd suggest a Volvo V70 estate, we have one here in Champagne colour, with full massage seats. Sorry they don't do head and face, but the airflow from the climate control is vigorous and could be directed...

P.S. I think you have the wrong number...
 
dean messenger said:
think a few people around here have had a humour bypass
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Exactly. I see no harm in it, as long as the reply isn't offensive, and makes it clear that there was a wrong number (as opposed to pretending to take a booking). Who knows, member the sender has a sense of humour too?

In response to the text itself - surely the length of face is dependent on the customer's mood (and whether or not they are a horse).
 
2blue4u said:
"Hi, how much do you charge for a fulm body swedish with a head and face massage pls and how long would this be? X"
Click to expand...

I would charge £20 ... and please bring cash as I don't accept credit cards.. PS Will I need to take my glasses off?
 
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