Road rage

[Hacker]

My mate Arthur waked into the pub last night cut, bruised and dishevelled.

I said " What the hell happened to you?"

He said " Oh, just a road rage incident"

"What happened?"

"Oh - I braked hard and someone ran into the back of me, the guy jumped out of his car and ran up to my door - he was a dwarf."

" I'm not happy!" he shouted.

" Which one are you then?" I replied.

 

[mattyh]

 

[CT]

 

[Marcel]

Hahaha took me two reads to get that

 

[Wile E. coyote]

Old one but still funny

 

[Cobra]

 

[boozybill]

 

[tricky]

 

[inaneredstripe]

grumpy?

 

[busterboy]

I like that Colin, Not heard it before either..

 

[madmitch]

 

[BRASH]

Never heard it before. Had me in stitches.

 

[Staggerlee]

Funny

 

[melbster]

 

[paulsmith]

Like it!

 

[mattyh]

Holy thread revival batman

 

[Samphire]

 

[boogie man]

A man wakes up in hospital with his head bandaged. The doctor tells him he's been involved in a nasty road accident and that both his ears have been sliced off. Also, unfortunately the hospital have run out of human ears and they have had to graft on an Alsatian's ear and a pig's ear. He's told to come back in a couple of weeks to see how he's getting on.

"So, how's it going? " says the doc when he returns for his check up.

"The Alsatian ear is amazing! I can hear things really clearly from miles away"

"How about the pig's ear?"

"Terrible! Nothing but crackling"

 

[photon]

Keeping it Disney...

I hear Mickey Mouse is divorcing Minnie.

When he claimed she was ******* Goofy, he didn't mean she had bucked teeth!