Put your Head between your legs and kiss your bum goodbye

If you have had the misfortune of catching either 'Made in Chelsea' or 'The Only Way is Essex' as I have when my kids watch them, then an argument for the end of the world gains validity.
 
photon said:
A group of entrepreneurial atheists has set up US website Eternal Earth-Bound Pets. For a fee they are offering to take the family pet off Christians' hands when they ascend into heaven.

"You've committed your life to Jesus. You know you're saved. But when the Rapture comes, what's to become of your loving pets who are left behind?" the website states.

"Eternal Earth-Bound Pets takes that burden off your mind.

"Each Eternal Earth-Bound Pet representative is a confirmed atheist, and as such will still be here on Earth after you've received your reward. Our network of animal activists are committed to step in when you step up to Jesus."

The service has been so popular that the group has expanded its services and increased fees.
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From their website:

IMPORTANT NOTICE 5/20/11: DUE TO UNPRESCEDENTED EMAIL VOLUME OUR EMAIL REPLY ABILITY HAS BEEN MAXED OUT. ONLY CONTRACT SUBMISSIONS WITH PAYPAL SUBMISSIONS WILL BE REPLIED TO IMMEDIATELY. ALL OTHER INQUIRES AND EMAILS WILL BE REPLIED TO BUT WITHIN THE NEXT 24 TO 48 HOURS. OUR APOLOGIES."


24-48 hours? What good is that to me, when at best in my time zone I am looking at 28 1/2 hours. Do I chance they reply in the 24 end of the time slot or is

bbqcat1.jpg


doomed too?
 
Would you really want an American stroking your pussy?
 
leftcurl said:
Harold Camping says believers will go to heaven and the rest will be left on earth to face final judgements before the earth is destroyed.
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Does this mean that all the old church goes will just vanish?

brilliant i'm going out on the motorbike for a blast, roads will be quiet and empty of old slow drivers!:D
 
leftcurl said:
here ya go...

Harold Camping who has studied the Bible for more than 50 years, believes that around 6pm 21 May 2011, a massive earthquake will hit New Zealand and from there continue around the world during the next 24 hours. He's going to watch this unfold on TV. At the end of this 24 hour period Harold Camping says believers will go to heaven and the rest will be left on earth to face final judgements before the earth is destroyed.
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Anyone know how to contact Mr Camping ? I was just thinking that as:

a) he's gonna be saved tommorow ,
b) its easier for a camel to pass through the eye of the needle than it is for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven,
c) I'm an aetheist so i'm screwed anyway,

I really ought to do him a favour and relieve him of all that evil pernicious money he's carrying arround in order to save his immortal soul ... its a dirty job but thats just the type of guy I am ;) :lol:
 
leftcurl said:
here ya go...

Harold Camping who has studied the Bible for more than 50 years, believes that around 6pm 21 May 2011, a massive earthquake will hit New Zealand and from there continue around the world during the next 24 hours. He's going to watch this unfold on TV. At the end of this 24 hour period Harold Camping says believers will go to heaven and the rest will be left on earth to face final judgements before the earth is destroyed.


There will be no chance of salvation during this time.

Harold Camping views phenomena such as the major earthquakes in Haiti, Christchurch and Japan, along with killer tornadoes in America and social decay seen in the likes of the gay pride movement, as "grim reminders" that the end is near.

i blame Jedward. For everything. :D
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So, no need to do a full week's shopping at Tesco this morning. Ah, there's positives in everything.
 
Pah! Typical innit! New Zealand's behind the times as usual ... after 6pm and nothing's happened there. :shrug:
 
I'm not dead yet.

But I did feel like dying earlier when taking to Santander. Couldn't, both, find, arse, hands, their, with.
 
People are discussing rapture like there's no tomorrow...
 
God dam it I didnt notice it was already in a thread haha, I think its a load of b******* lol
 
The website promoting today is no longer responding.

Either it's being swamped by last minute visits, Doomsday is canceled and the site's been taken down, or the webserver was destroyed in the apocalypse... :shrug:
 
Well, nothing happening here just a typical Saturday afterno
 
Somelier said:
Are these the same people who believe the world was created in 2004 BC?
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Nope, they believe it was created around 4000BC. :bang:

I've been having a great laugh at this today, at first I was thinking that guys like that give the rest of us Christians a bad name, but now I'm thinking that people might look more kindly on the Church now we've given them a good laugh!

Tried to get a few of my more conservative thinking Christian friends to leave me their camera equipment...they didn't take it so well.....
 
Theres still time. If it dont happen, I might be doing a bit of selling, In the clasifided section.

As I will have a lot of tinned food, and bottled water. To get rid of :D:D:D
 
Pope Benedict XVI spoke to astronauts on the International Space Station. I wonder if he asked if they had a spare berth?
 
wallyboy said:
what time to-day, have i got time to eat drink and be merry :thumbs:
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the prediction was about 6pm EST so thats about 11pm our time - so the world is going to end at kicking out time apparently (sounds about right it's like armageddon most saturday evening at kicking out time)

your round I think :beer:
 
wallyboy said:
what time to-day, have i got time to eat drink and be merry :thumbs:
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well, if it's 6PM ..is that Eastern Seaboard Time, Pacific Standard Time as the time will be later here in the UK

ah..it's ''Harold Camping, a preacher from Oakland, California, .''

so that's 8 hours ....so at 2AM tomorrow i will achieve ''Rapture''

well that'll be a first..........:D
 
It's supposed to be 6pm in each time zone starting with the Eastern Hemisphere with a rolling apocalypse of doom spreading westwards. Not mention of whether he meant to include DST or non DST times...

8pm and everything is normal. I'm sure cats would have suddenly learned how to use tin openers today if it were real...
 
I'm confussed, i thought Ryan Giggs started this thread when i saw the title :lol:
 
srichards said:
..................8pm and everything is normal. I'm sure cats would have suddenly learned how to use tin openers today if it were real...
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ah...well, just 1/2 way through a bottle of fine Oz Shiraz ...making a chicken curry from scratch

put food out for the 2 farm cats

all is well with the world ...bring it ON..!!!
 
Well, drank all the wine last night and ate all the chocolate for breakfast. Best get on with some ironing that I put off just in case!!!
 
Well that was a bit of an anticlimax. I'm still here and if there was an earthquake it wasn't strong enough to wake me.
 
I'VE JUST REALIZED.................it's all a very clever plot

Harold will be ostracized by his Ministry members ..and disappear into obscurity for ever

then someone will says...''where's all the Radio money...:gag:

''Family Radio had net assets of approximately $122 million in 2007''
 
With the rising costs of residential care for elderly, I'm afraid we're likely to see more and more of these international plots. Terry Wogan ran several, and used the broadcast media to feather the nests of TOGS, but cruelly barred our misunderstood branch of the fraternity.
 
Mike Jackson said:
Well that was a bit of an anticlimax. I'm still here and if there was an earthquake it wasn't strong enough to wake me.
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oh well its not the end of the world :coat:
 
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