Practical jokes, let's hear about your's.

Nout big, but when I was in year 4 (about 8 YO.) My teacher hated spiders, so obviously being a boy I got a spider from the local toy store. brought it into school, put it on her chair, waiting for her to get into the classroom.

She walked in over to the desk. Sat on her chair, stood up rather quickly looked round and screamed her head off :D I was popular for half the day, she found hte funny side of it eventually.
 
no one done clingfilm over the loo yet?
my dad made me mop the bathroom floor.. then grounded me for a week. i was 15.

our notoriously tightwad boss years ago was dropped in it.
we superglued a 5p to the workshop floor.
he spent 5 mins trying to it up.
dissapeared , and came back with a hammer and chisel to get it up.
half the factory were watching him from the forst floor canteen window.
several sets of pants were moistened that morning.
 
There was a new bloke where i used to work, who thought he was Jack the lad, one of the managers asked him to pop to the bank to pay something in for him, he handed him the envelope and off he went.
The envelope contained a scribbled letter saying something along the lines of "I have a weapon, put £10,000 in a bag and hand it over the counter".
Bang, screen up, security guards all over. Took a bit of explaining down the cop shop, that one.

Another,
We used to tie fishing line to peoples door knockers, and hide across the road and pull it. Hours of laughter.

Another,
When wheelie bins first were introduced, we tied a crab line to one of the handles, and tilted it up on a brick, tied the other end to someones door knocker, banged on the door and scarpered, They opened the door and got a hallway full of trash.

Another,
Collected massive amounts of dog poo, and wrapped it up in newspaper. Put it on someones doorstep and set light to it, knocked on the door and run. We t ourselfs when the chap came out in his slippers and stamped on it to put it out,:lol: S41t everywhere
Dean:)
 
Dino f said:
There was a new bloke where i used to work, who thought he was Jack the lad, one of the managers asked him to pop to the bank to pay something in for him, he handed him the envelope and off he went.
The envelope contained a scribbled letter saying something along the lines of "I have a weapon, put £10,000 in a bag and hand it over the counter".
Bang, screen up, security guards all over. Took a bit of explaining down the cop shop, that one.

THAT WAS JUST PLAIN STUPID, IRRESPONSIBLE, DANGEROUS, ETC. ETC NOT FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Another,
We used to tie fishing line to peoples door knockers, and hide across the road and pull it. Hours of laughter.

Another,
When wheelie bins first were introduced, we tied a crab line to one of the handles, and tilted it up on a brick, tied the other end to someones door knocker, banged on the door and scarpered, They opened the door and got a hallway full of trash.

Another,
Collected massive amounts of dog poo, and wrapped it up in newspaper. Put it on someones doorstep and set light to it, knocked on the door and run. We t ourselfs when the chap came out in his slippers and stamped on it to put it out,:lol: S41t everywhere
Dean:)
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A refinement to the clingfilm/bog one is to remove the lightbulb from that area.

Condoms over both handlebar grips of a mate's Triumph Tiger 100 were funny in themselves but when he had problems keeping the throttle open on a 200 mile ride home, it was even funnier!

Once jacked a mate's car up and let it down on bricks so the wheels were JUST off the ground. Took him a while to suss what was going on.

Poured 1/2 a bottle of Fairy liquid into a Laundrette washing machine. Filled the place to about 2' deep in foam.

Faked up a letter to a mate who was in the TA telling him he had 48 hours to prepare for a trip to somewhere sandy in 1991.

Let someone go off on one, slagging someone off completely for almost 5 solid minutes, then said "you do know he's my uncle, don't you?". In fact, I didn't know the bloke who was being slagged off.

One I have planned is to sit near a road with 2 flashguns and wait for someone I know to drive past...
 
There was a bloke we worked with many years ago who was an arrogant **** at the best of times. If there was a cardboard box on the floor, without fail he would take a run and welly it across the workshop floor.

One day, another workmate found an empty box and filled it full of house bricks.

I'll let you guess what happened.
 
Borats Baby said:
There was a bloke we worked with many years ago who was an arrogant **** at the best of times. If there was a cardboard box on the floor, without fail he would take a run and welly it across the workshop floor.

One day, another workmate found an empty box and filled it full of house bricks.

I'll let you guess what happened.
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When I was an apprentice, a lad did something similar to another apprentice with a drinks can placed over a metal stud sticking up through the floor. Just as well we wore steel toe cap boots. :lol:
 
we did the usual empty someone's room when we lived in halls and rearrange perfectly outside in the car park
 
Probably the harshest one was when I joined my unit about 5 years ago (in fact almost 5 years to the day...spooky). We were laughing and joking and someone made a 'yo mamma' joke. Pan faced, my reponse was "my mother died 6 months ago". Not one I'm proud of to be honest, and not something I joke about now!
 
We once connected a colleagues break pedal to his horn.

Another favourite was moving and/or hiding peoples cars using a massive forklift.
 
We moved a mate's mini once, from our main carpark into a space round back at our loading bay. He still never figured out how he forgot where he'd parked.
 
One time in halls we took someone from the flat above [our "rivals"!]'s mattress and locked it in our kitchen and wouldn't let them in.

Another time we froze someone's shoe in a big block of ice.

And a friend of mine covered someone's room in Post-Its. I saw the photos and they were on every surface! Was quite random and therefore quite funny.
 
ChrisMClark said:
We moved a mate's mini once, from our main carpark into a space round back at our loading bay. He still never figured out how he forgot where he'd parked.
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We did that with a lads Fiat Cinquecento. One lad on each arch, carried it out of a car park and plonked it on the road nearby. He was a proper goon.
 
Borats Baby said:
We did that with a lads Fiat Cinquecento. One lad on each arch, carried it out of a car park and plonked it on the road nearby. He was a proper goon.
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The rugby boys lifted and moved a mate's mini 90 degrees in it's space so that it was blocked in by the cars that were originally parked side by side to it
 
kelack said:
The rugby boys lifted and moved a mate's mini 90 degrees in it's space so that it was blocked in by the cars that were originally parked side by side to it
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Imagine the faces of the owners of the cars parked next to it when they come back.

:suspect:

:shrug:
 
Swapping a hard boiled egg (shell still on) in a mates lunch box with an uncooked one
 
One guy at work was a bit of a prat so we got the cabin steward to let us into his cabin and pulled cling film pulled tight over the toilet bowl :lol:, put hair removal cream into his shampoo and took one of every pair of socks:lol::lol:

Oh and the ships cook didnt like the captain very much so he took some mixed nuts (of which the captain liked to have a bowl on his desk) and poured them down his trousers whilst cooking lunch then put them in the Bowl :gag:
 
kelack said:
The rugby boys lifted and moved a mate's mini 90 degrees in it's space so that it was blocked in by the cars that were originally parked side by side to it
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We did something similar at Uni.

Our mate had a Citroen Visa. The house we had was a townhouse with a car port at the bottom underneath the house. So one night we had a few sherberts, and on the way back in we turned his citroen visa round 90 degrees, so he had a solid brick wall in front and behind the car, with about a foot space at each end.

Another time we took a roll of cling film to someone's car. Got nicked for that, until they realised they couldn't actually do us for adding to a car, rather than trying to nick or damage it.
 
A good few years ago I recorded the National Lottery one week and put a ticket on with all the same winning numbers for the following week. The following week I pressed play unbeknown to my girlfriend and shouted to her to check the numbers as they were supposedly being read out. I thought that she would be jumping up and down with excitement as the numbers were read out that allegedly matched the ticket. I heard nothing, so went downstairs to find her shaking like a leaf. She thought we had won almost 7 million and was feeling sick. She battered me all over the place when I admitted what I had done. My mate who had suggested the idea was banned from the house for almost 3 months.

No sense of humour :shake:

Chris :)
 
In the Army, (Kings Troop RHA, 200 horses or so) morning reveille is at 6pm, its winter so its very dark at that time in the morning.

It was expected for every soldier that after hearing morning reveille being played (trumpet) you had approximately five minutes to get out of bed, get your kit on and be down the stables mucking out horses...

Every day was the same, we could all do it half asleep and usually where.

Queue us lot, ….getting in late one evening about 1am.

New boy wakes from his bead as we stumble around trying to get into ours.
:naughty:
To new boy. "Yeah its reveille, get up and get yourself down to the stables pronto newbie!"
New boy quickly climbs into uniform and rushes of to start mucking out the horses.

We're all watching from the window above in hysterics as he’s starts mucking out the horses all by himself …Five minutes later the regiments military police promptly arrest him and throw him in a cell for wakening the horses to early.

:lol::lol:



Blimey...I have hundreds of these stories.... Did you know pound coins when red hot look just the same as when their cold... :suspect:
 
Guy at work (tv repair shop) used to have his routine sit on the toilet reading the paper first thing in the morning. We fitted a pin down through each side of the seat attached the bottoms to leads going to a dc volts generator, waited till he got settled and ramped the generator up to 60v, There's probably still a dent in the ceiling where his head hit it!
 
While at uni, my brother and his flatmates nicked a load of turf from the grounds of their halls (rolled up waiting to be laid, they didn't actually dig up the lawns!) and laid it on the floor of their kitchen.
The cleaners couldn't work out whether to laugh or cry apparently!
 
I have been known to go around and change all of the clocks in the house, and even sneak out and change the time on the clock in the car, and the time on his (Chris') watch ... then wake him up and tell him he is going to be late for work at 2am. He made it all the way into work, and was standing at the clocking in machine when it finally dawned on him that he was 5 hours early for work :lol:

Well it serves him right for laughing at me when I tripped over!
 
I put a King Cobra in the breadbin and asked my wife to make me some toast.



I miss her.
 
Not exactly a practical joke, but I met this senior police officer from Africa once who recounted this true story. When he went on patrol, he went out for 2 weeks covering a huge area of hundreds of square miles. Before going he went to the stores, where he was issued with a jeep, provisions, loads of armoury and a native sergeant.

Halfway through their patrol they were sent to a remote village where the body of a man had been found lying just outside the village. A quick examination showed the man had been stabbed. The officer left the Sgt to guard the body with his rusty old Lee Enfield Rifle, while he went off to find the village head man to commence enquiries.

On returning a couple of hours later, the sgt was still dutifully standing guard, but it was a completely different body in entirley different clothes! :thinking:

It transpired that the sgt had lambed off to see some hussy he knew who lived nearby. In the meantime the family of the dead man had turned up and taken the body away!

On returning to his post, and finding the body missing, the sgt knew he was in deep doody, but he solved the problem to his own satisfaction at least, by shooting the first geezer who walked past! :lol:
 
has anyone watched the inbetweeners episode with the hair removal cream, me and my mates copied that.

this kid that gets on everyones nerves found out that his girlfriend is "ready" and so he went all around he school bragging about it and when he came up to me and my mates he decided to pee us off. not anymore.

he fell asleep in the common room (we did keep him up that night by spiking his drinks with stay awake pills) so one of my mates got his moms hair removal cream and sprayed it down this kids boxers. oh how we laughed when we saw the look on hs face the next day.
 
Been a few threads hauled back from history lately:)
 
Usual Army stuff - turd in a Bergen on exercise, raw fish in the MFO comfort box going on Tour.
Ringing up some bloke's GF telling her he's actually Gay etc etc etc...

Most recent was in Afghan in 2004 (yeah I've kind of grown out of it) when we put four catering-sized cans of peas in the SO3's bergen...he hates peas...
Doesn't sound very bad, does it, apart from them weighing about 2KG each...

Only, in 2006 when we were stopped coming back from Afghanistan again, for a routine kit-check at Brize-Norton, all four cans came out of his bergen...two years and he'd not even noticed...his look of total incomprehension was just like Hugh Laurie in Blackadder...
The RAF Police couldn't work out why Paul (ENG Cameraman) and I were on the floor crying with laughter...
 
Blue Moon 7 said:
A good few years ago I recorded the National Lottery one week and put a ticket on with all the same winning numbers for the following week. The following week I pressed play unbeknown to my girlfriend and shouted to her to check the numbers as they were supposedly being read out. I thought that she would be jumping up and down with excitement as the numbers were read out that allegedly matched the ticket. I heard nothing, so went downstairs to find her shaking like a leaf. She thought we had won almost 7 million and was feeling sick. She battered me all over the place when I admitted what I had done. My mate who had suggested the idea was banned from the house for almost 3 months.

No sense of humour :shake:

Chris :)
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:lol:

A friend of mine does something similar, he told me he chooses 6 numbers, but does not buy a ticket. He then said that if his numbers come up he'll kill himself! :lol::eek:
 
HuntMike said:
:lol:

A friend of mine does something similar, he told me he chooses 6 numbers, but does not buy a ticket. He then said that if his numbers come up he'll kill himself! :lol::eek:
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I once did that with the football pools many years ago and the draws came up:eek:, didn't kill myself though:D
 
ON a camping trip with venture scouts, hid someones car by lifting up a frame tent an moving it over the car. WIth a bit of dew on the inside the car was invisible.

I was wrote on all sides of a pizza box (was unused) and posted it to a friend at uni. She laughed when she saw it and opened it in the communal dining room, to stop laughing as the contents of a hole punch blew (or three)around the room.

Sellotaped posters etc down the passenger side of a car, knowing that the driving would get straight in the dirvers side and not check the car.
 
One of the guy's I worked with once brought in some sponge cakes and custard to consume on our coffee break.

Except for one lad, he'd brought in a yellow dish washing sponge and placed tht in the bowl, covered it in custard and passed it across.

To see this lad try to break up the sponge (literally) with the side of his spoon was great. Still laugh about it to this day.

he quite literally did have "Sponge" and custard
 
Placing a can of pepsi max on a flat bag with a hole (the bag has the hole that the can fits through) that in turn sits on an 'electric' fly swatter and selotaping the buttons so the fly swatter is 'activated'. Then asking someone new if they want a can of pepsi max for free as the vending machine gave me the wrong can.

Works every time. :D
 
gobby tw**s first day working for a farm contractor. oh the poor lad.

walked in aged 17, full of chat, 'what's the craic here? what time's smoko? what times lunch etc etc etc'

went to use the portaloo in the corner of the yard, which was sat on a pallet!

we had 2 loaders in the yard (jcb with extendable boom) an old matress and a sheet of wood!

picked the sheet of wood up with the matress on top, and put the portaloo on the roof of the barn. he went bloody balistic thinking we had put him on the 1st floor platform, jumped out the loo and thank god the matress was there, would've fallen about 30ft without it! pretty stupid really looking back but it quietened him down abit, 2 weeks (and no more jokes) he jacked in!
 
I found this thread by accident whilst looking for something else.

Anyone up for a revival? I've got a few which I can post later.
 
Flash In The Pan said:
The guy at our local car accessory shop glued a 10p coin to the pavement outside the shop and then had a laugh at everyone trying to pick it up.

He wasn't laughing when we pulled up, my mate jumped out with a hammer and chisel, removed the coin and we drove off with it :lol:
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I would wet myself at someone taking all that effort for 10pence!
 
When I started as an apprentice electrician in 1969, I was told by people about striped paint, sky hooks, a long weight (long WAIT) etc.

We had been working on a site in Liverpool Street so I got to know a little hardware shop where we could buy screws, bolts etc instead of going back to the depot.

Anyway I got to know the owner, a lovely little Jewish chap, and one day I was asked to go down to the shop to get a box of screws and 12 half inch holes. So I went into the shop and I told him I wanted a box of 1.1/2 x 8's, "Anything else"? and I told him about the holes. "I'm fed up with people treating you lads like idiots, are you going anywhere else"?. "Yes" I said "Got to get some rolls from the deli". "OK" he said "Pop in on your way back".

When I got back to the shop he had drilled 12 1/2 inch holes in a piece of old tin, gave me a bill for £1, "There" he said "That should show them".

So I went back gave the 'holes' to the electrician and the bill for a £1. After a bit of arguing he paid up.

I NEVER got sent for anything dodgy again. I took the old boy a bottle of beer as a thank you.
 
Does wiring a battery to a metal urinal count before a few yelps and splashes. Ho hum...
 
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