My wife

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My wife came home, screeched her car into the driveway, and ran into the house. She slammed the door and shouted at the top of her lungs, 'Honey, pack your bags. I've won the lottery!'

I said, 'Oh my God! What should I pack, beach stuff or mountain stuff?' 'Doesn't matter,' she said. 'Just get out.


;)
 
Polish bloke goes for an eye test, the optician shows him a card with the letters


'BRZECYSZCZYKIEWICZ' 'Can you read this?' he asks.


'Read it?' the Polish bloke replies, 'I know the guy.'
 
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Mother Superior called all the nuns together and said to them, 'I must tell you all something. We have a case of gonorrhea in the convent.'

'Thank God,' said an elderly nun at the back. 'I'm so tired of Chardonnay.
 
Fifty-one years ago, Herman James, a North Carolina mountain man, was drafted by the Army. On his first day in basic training, the Army issued him a comb. That afternoon the Army barber sheared off all his hair. On his second day, the Army issued Herman a toothbrush. That afternoon the Army dentist yanked seven of his teeth. On the third day, the Army issued him a jock strap.



The Army has been looking for Herman for 51 years.
 
Polish bloke goes for an eye test, the optician shows him a card with the letters


'C Z W I X N O S T A C Z.' 'Can you read this?' he asks.


'Read it?' the Polish bloke replies, 'I know the guy.'
..............
Not funny at all....specially that in polish language there is no x used at all ...

and this word makes no sense at all..


if you would give one of real polish words then maybe ...


:coat:
 
Apologies to the Polish nation and in particular any Poles on here, give me a good clean Polish word and I'll edit it for you :)
 
..............
Not funny at all....specially that in polish language there is no x used at all ...

and this word makes no sense at all..


if you would give one of real polish words then maybe ...


:coat:

its joke man-lighten up :lol:
 
Thanks to bastic for a proper Polish word, even better if you google it it makes even more sense! :)
 
I have a friend who was a victim of ID fraud.

His name was Cid - now we just call him C

:gag:
 
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I have a friend who was a victim of ID fraud.

His name was Cid - now we just call him C

:gag:

shouldnt that be id theft lol

Lucky they didnt steel his pictures too or the would have been C opyright theft and you would have just had to call him " "
 
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Bah you get the point - not only is it a rubbish joke but I am rubbish at telling the rubbish joke.

Oh the irony :)
 
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