kids being labelled to avoid responsibility

BarryDawsib said:
Theres a hell of a lot of common sense, a lot of people on here may not have ever seen anyone with any genuine disability BUT in most cases its not difficult to see when it is just an excuse.
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Really? Are you qualified to make the decisions and have the medical knowledge to show who is fake and who is not?

Where is the evidence to back up that huge amounts are faking it, to get more benefits?

Really people in this thread should be ashamed. Then when someone says, my son has these conditions, you all suddenly change to "Yeah well you have the condition, I feel for you, but I wasn't talking about you, just all the others who fake it."
 
Agree with ding

You don't really know or understand anything about a disability until you have dealt with it 24/7.
 
zak5ive said:
and how do you know the difference? Unles you have had to fight for everything that your child needs, and i mean fight, and had to endure the stares and accusing looks of people who think like this then really i don't think you have anything to say.

My child has cerebral palsy, a learning disability and epilepsy. He uses a wheelchair, does this mean that he is lazy and should walk? or that because i come from a large council estate that I am bad parent and should not encourage him to be lazy? Because that is what you are saying about the children who have ADHD and Autism, because you don't know if it is a correct diagnosis or not so why judge?
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okay you are taking everything what I said out of context, for one cerebal Palsy and epilepsy is NOT ADHD, and ADHD is what I have been talking about in this thread. It is also a recognised dysability not a personality defect I have the umost respect for parents who claim their kids have it, but work hard to deal with the problem and not shout the rooftops. Then you have the parents that I was taking about that blame ADHD for Everything, and do not even bother to try and deal with them or sort them out. By having ADHD does not mean they cannot possibly learn manners, it also doesn't mean that the parents have to just stop making the effort because its easier to blame everything on ADHD, and make it clear to everyone that "oooh my child has adhd" when the real parents that deal with it keep it to themselves
 
It's not that clear cut, a lot of children with ADHD are somewhere on the Autistic spectrum. Depending on the individual you may find that they can learn manners but not understand them so have to copy what they see others doing. Children with Aspergers find this particularly difficult as they have trouble reading people/social situations and it is enormously frustrating for them.

Autism is a lot like Orwell's take on communism. "All people are equal but some are more equal than others"
 
Recent research seem to suggest its alot of concentration issues (including ADHD) to do with our heavy advertising industry, basically there are so many things shown in interesting ways we as a younger generation find it hard to concentrate on the boring things, so as the OP said about plonking her in front of the TV, probs the worst thing to do, just lets the mind wonder more.

Also something of interest ADHD spreads more like a disease, if you look at a graph of cases of ADHD in america its all in the east cost, and fades out towards the bible belt, and almost no existent on the west cost... interesting really

Jack
 
Your first post.

archamedes said:
One thing i really hate at the moment is the way people are trying to label their kids with ADHD or autism to excuse their behaviour.
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Your latest post.

archamedes said:
okay you are taking everything what I said out of context, for one cerebal Palsy and epilepsy is NOT ADHD, and ADHD is what I have been talking about in this thread. It is also a recognised dysability not a personality defect I have the umost respect for parents who claim their kids have it <snip>
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You fail to understand and show your ignorance further

Your words are quoted in context and you did not state you simply had a bug bear about your perceptions of ADHD and the apparent mishandlings of parents who use it, in your eyes, as an excuse for bad behaviour. You continued with your remarks along with many others here.

and you go on further to say you have the utmost respect for parents who make CLAIMS that their kids have it...

which shows your complete lack of respect for those who have to struggle every single day simply to get through to the next day. Using such words as "claim their kids have it" shows you do not recognise it as a disability and it is just a claim made by a parent - ergo, no recognition or respect whatsoever.

Until people, such as yourself, live with autism or ANY recognised disability, whether you perceive it or not as a disability, you will never have any idea whatsoever of what it is like to try and live with the effects of these disabilities.

I sincerely hope that you never ever have to deal with any mental health issues in your family.




Just because you can't see it - doesn't mean it's not there and it's not very real in other peoples lives. He looks normal - therefore he is. I've heard it a million times. You can't see a brain, you can't see how it's wired up - and you have no idea at all how devastating living with autism can be.

You are extremely fortunate to live your neurotypical world.

Unfortunately, for many of us, life isn't as simple and straightforward as yours.

I know little of ADHD personally, but I do know about Autism and Asperger's.

If you wish to rant about how you don't believe parents "parent" their children correctly, then you go right ahead and be the judge and jury of your family, friends, neighbours or strangers - but I suggest you choose your words carefully when you start throwing around words like "autism" as you did in your first ranting post.
 
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If the behaviour of child is not controlled! Then why not? ... I'm sure there are many illnesses that make it difficult but not impossible. The op talked of parents using it as an excuse and it happens all too often. Do these kids have some special right to claim immunity for all bad behavior?..... Not in my opinion......tolerance yes, but not the right to interefere with other peoples lives.
 
Steep said:
No, it's you who's judging yourself and you're deliberately misreading what I wrote. If your child has those conditions then you don't fall into the category that the OP complains of. I'd have thought you of all people would agree with him that people who make such claims falsely were the problem.
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:plusone:
 
Splog said:
If the behaviour of child is not controlled! Then why not? ...
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That makes as much sense as saying, sure they have a broken leg, but why can't they walk properly.

Certain situations can cause children to act very differently, especially in situations where they are not familiar or do not feel comfortable. Most have been taught right and wrong, but cannot "process" it correctly. Just because you see a child in one situation does not mean you can pass comment. Even the best behaved child can have bad days.
 
a rather interesting set of threads started by this OP

usually starts in some long rant with some very specific details and then explodes ..... I'm just saying is all!


archamedes said:
Okay people, i just had a little brainfart i need help with. I suffer from dyscalcula which is the dyslexic version of maths. My english is great but i can't do anything when it comes to mathmatic calculations even the most basic and sometimes its embarresing.
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stop blaming the fact you are rubbish at maths on some made up disease!!!

:lol:
 
ding76uk said:
That makes as much sense as saying, sure they have a broken leg, but why can't they walk properly.

Certain situations can cause children to act very differently, especially in situations where they are not familiar or do not feel comfortable. Most have been taught right and wrong, but cannot "process" it correctly. Just because you see a child in one situation does not mean you can pass comment. Even the best behaved child can have bad days.
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In that case then they should not be allowed to roam wild and should be looked after by responsible adults.
 
Splog said:
In that case then they should not be allowed to roam wild and should be looked after by responsible adults.
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And once weve shut them off from the rest of the world whats the next step sterilising them? o wait that already happened, under the third reich!!! (generally things nazi germany were famous for wont to be avoided in current day situations)

well at least thats what it sounded like you were saying

Jack :thumbs:
 
Llama said:
And once weve shut them off from the rest of the world whats the next step sterilising them? o wait that already happened, under the third reich!!! (generally things nazi germany were famous for wont to be avoided in current day situations)

well at least thats what it sounded like you were saying

Jack :thumbs:
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Please don't try to read between the lines.... as there are no words there.
 
well if you continue a metaphor people will read between the lines, as thats how they work

People will always read between the lines, i think you should probally be aware of what they may think youre saying
 
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Llama said:
well if you continue a metaphor people will read between the lines, as thats how they work

People will always read between the lines, i think you should probally be aware of what they may think youre saying
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What metaphor? ....... I don't care what people think!
 
Anyway, can't arsed with this thread anymore
 
I'm coming in here as a 19 year old, so I've grown up with a lot with all these different conditions.

Firstly - yes, ADHD is an overused term. About half the people I've known in school with it had never been diagnosed, their parents had labeled them with it. Sorry, but it happens a fair bit nowadays. Which is bad for those kids, and is bad for the people genuinely with it.

I've also known a couple with very severe ADHD. And if you met them briefly, most of the people in this thread would judge them as badly behaved kids. It isn't until you've spent more time with them it becomes apparent just how different it is than it appears at first glance, even in people with severe forms. You have to understand though, it isn't just something that makes a kid shout or have a tamtrum, it's something with a major impact on every aspect of their life.


I've also known a few people with dyslexia and other such conditions that have been labeled on this thread as excuses. Tell me this, why would these kids suddenly become a lot better with certain coloured paper in some cases and such? I think a lot of the misunderstandings on this come from the idea that it's an excuse to be thick. How many people realise Pierre Curie was dyslexic? How about John Lennon, Winston Churchill, JFK?

Oh and John Lennon also had ADHD. It's pretty well known that Albert Einstein was considered to have both ADHD and dyslexia.

And and err, none of those were born in the last 15 years when it's apparently "appeared". You know, in case any of you aren't up on your history ;)




I have to say it concerns me that so many people still don't realise these things actually exist. I'm by no means saying that some people don't wrongly abuse the labels, but people have also lied saying themselves or their children have cancer, yet I've never heard anyone suggesting that is a new fangled, made up illness. Some people lying about an illness doesn't make it all non-existent.
 
littlemonster said:
I'm coming in here as a 19 year old, so I've grown up with a lot with all these different conditions.

Firstly - yes, ADHD is an overused term. About half the people I've known in school with it had never been diagnosed, their parents had labeled them with it. Sorry, but it happens a fair bit nowadays. Which is bad for those kids, and is bad for the people genuinely with it.

I've also known a couple with very severe ADHD. And if you met them briefly, most of the people in this thread would judge them as badly behaved kids. It isn't until you've spent more time with them it becomes apparent just how different it is than it appears at first glance, even in people with severe forms. You have to understand though, it isn't just something that makes a kid shout or have a tamtrum, it's something with a major impact on every aspect of their life.


I've also known a few people with dyslexia and other such conditions that have been labeled on this thread as excuses. Tell me this, why would these kids suddenly become a lot better with certain coloured paper in some cases and such? I think a lot of the misunderstandings on this come from the idea that it's an excuse to be thick. How many people realise Pierre Curie was dyslexic? How about John Lennon, Winston Churchill, JFK?

Oh and John Lennon also had ADHD. It's pretty well known that Albert Einstein was considered to have both ADHD and dyslexia.

And and err, none of those were born in the last 15 years when it's apparently "appeared". You know, in case any of you aren't up on your history ;)




I have to say it concerns me that so many people still don't realise these things actually exist. I'm by no means saying that some people don't wrongly abuse the labels, but people have also lied saying themselves or their children have cancer, yet I've never heard anyone suggesting that is a new fangled, made up illness. Some people lying about an illness doesn't make it all non-existent.
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:agree:

Im often told im on the dyslexic spectrum, although not officially tested, i do notice it, i put in more work than some kids, and in an english class for example people think im an A/A* student when they here me speak, and i get those grades in my speaking and listing, however Im struggling to make a C overall because i really struggle to use written communication to show my ideas. I dont use it as an excuse, and i no many kids with genuine ADHD and autism, trust me were not faking it for some sympahy, its **** having it!

And all the people who have it do get treated differently but they need it, shouting at people with sever learning differences wont necerserally change things

In no way am i saying just let it slide, but people have to go about things in different ways

Every time someone tells me ive spelt that wrong or that doesn't make sence, that doesn't help me. It may help you but i find it more useful to just type something out, because you can point something out to me a million times with spelling, chances are, it wont go in!, i just need to use a spell checker and make sure its right for the important things

Jack
 
Decca said:
There is a hell of a lot of ignorance in this thread..
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no ones saying that its an excuse in all kids - but there are definitely some out there who are only suffering from "naughty little ****er syndrome"

and even when a kid really has ADHD are we really doing them any favours by not teaching them how to function in society - giving them the idea they can do whatever they like because "all bad behaviour is due to their condition" isnt going to help them

for example in one place I used to work we had a guy who used to roll out his "disability" as an excuse everytime he did anything wrong

work late for deadline - sorry its my adhd
lack of punctuality - sorry its my adhd
unacceptable conduct in meetings -sorry its my adhd

and so on - until HR finally got some advice from the ADHD society and grew a pair in dealing with him

then one day - pinned bosses pa to wall and groped her tits - sorry its my ADHD - tell someone who cares you little ****, the door's that way

so now hes unemployed and unemployable - which wouldnt have happened if mumsy and dadsy hadnt brought him up to believe he could do whatever he like and excuse it by saying - sorry its my adhd

(and by the way i know about statementing and genuine disability - my sister has had ME since she was 12 , shes 33 now ... but that makes me more angry at seeing naughty little ****s excused every bad behaviour on the grounds of their 'disability' who grow up believing the world owes them a living)
 
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big soft moose said:
no ones saying that its an excuse in all kids - but there are definitely some out there who are only suffering from "naughty little ****er syndrome"
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How do you know this? These kids do not look any different from a normal child, they just have an illness of the brain. I am sure there are cases of it being used and abused, but not in the mass majority. Saying things like that almost belittles it for those who suffer and their families.
 
ding76uk said:
How do you know this? These kids do not look any different from a normal child, they just have an illness of the brain. I am sure there are cases of it being used and abused, but not in the mass majority. Saying things like that almost belittles it for those who suffer and their families.
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this is a good video to watch, there is a very interesting section at 3.30 onwards which kind of argues that it is being used and abused in the mass majority

[YOUTUBE]zDZFcDGpL4U[/YOUTUBE]
 
joescrivens said:
this is a good video to watch, there is a very interesting section at 3.30 onwards which kind of argues that it is being used and abused in the mass majority

[YOUTUBE]zDZFcDGpL4U[/YOUTUBE]
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That was the video i was talking about eariler, interesting how it moves like a disease instead of random occurrences like we would expect


DorsetDude said:
Invoke Godwins law, thread closed...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Godwin's_law
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yes its sadly true, it does come up alot. But nazi werent the only ones to do it, they were probally just the most well know, i can change it to americans if you want ???

Jack:thumbs:
 
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