Getting the snip

When I was about 20 I decided to have a haircut for the first time since I left school. Punk rock having, at a stroke, destroyed the whole point of hippydom.

I asked my dad which barber he used. He very happily took me to his.

We walked in and the barber said, "Oh, so this is the weird one you told me about."

Needless to say, we had words. He was probably right though.
 
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POAH said:
disappointed this thread is not about a vasectomy
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LOL after seeing the title I thought we were going to be treated to the horror stories of walking like a cowboy:D I had one in 1982, done under a general anaesthetic. Nurse handed me a razor and said go shave your nether region. Later in the ward another nurse, older came in lifted the covers and said I need to check you've done it properly. Ok, I said. When I got wheeled to the theatre that same old nurse was cleaning the floor, turned out she wasn't a nurse but a bloody cleaner. I must have made her day:LOL::LOL:
 
frank said:
LOL after seeing the title I thought we were going to be treated to the horror stories of walking like a cowboy:D I had one in 1982, done under a general anaesthetic. Nurse handed me a razor and said go shave your nether region. Later in the ward another nurse, older came in lifted the covers and said I need to check you've done it properly. Ok, I said. When I got wheeled to the theatre that same old nurse was cleaning the floor, turned out she wasn't a nurse but a bloody cleaner. I must have made her day:LOL::LOL:
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Lol
 
read the title of this and was expecting something very different!"
 
viv1969 said:
Two bricks in a swift "together" movement.
Quicker.
Cheaper.
No need to shave.
:LOL:
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A pair of these Ruth and yes they are real :D

IMG_4610.jpg

durex.jpg
 
Barber stories.....

Round our way, if a kid wriggled in the chair then the barber would use their razor to leave a 'burn' mark on the back of the child's neck - I got a few of those when I was small.

When I was a kid the traditional barber's shop had equipment & lighting that looked more like it belonged in a dentist. There was a 'gentlemen's hairdresser' that was opened up in Portland Rd. South Norwood, by a guy with big hair, and was all done out with bamboo furniture, long-leafed potted plants, soft lighting and 'gentlemen's magazines' on the coffee table in the waiting area. It was there for a long time (though the mags did get toned down after a while) but is now a tattoo parlour.

I could tell a few vasectomy stories too, like the way the post-op bruising migrates along the length, eventually reaching the end before fading.
 
ancient_mariner said:
Barber stories.....

Round our way, if a kid wriggled in the chair then the barber would use their razor to leave a 'burn' mark on the back of the child's neck - I got a few of those when I was small.

When I was a kid the traditional barber's shop had equipment & lighting that looked more like it belonged in a dentist. There was a 'gentlemen's hairdresser' that was opened up in Portland Rd. South Norwood, by a guy with big hair, and was all done out with bamboo furniture, long-leafed potted plants, soft lighting and 'gentlemen's magazines' on the coffee table in the waiting area. It was there for a long time (though the mags did get toned down after a while) but is now a tattoo parlour.

I could tell a few vasectomy stories too, like the way the post-op bruising migrates along the length, eventually reaching the end before fading.
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Yeah but did the swelling go down? :)
 
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Cobra said:
And the Classic,
"Hey Doc, please take away the pain, but can you leave the swelling?
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Why would you want swollen testes? :eek::confused: (deliberately mis-understanding).
 
ancient_mariner said:
Why would you want swollen testes? :eek::confused: (deliberately mis-understanding).
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:D

People keep telling me to grow a pair,
if you are gonna have some, have some big ones,
that's what I say :thumbs:
:p
 
Must have been lucky with mine! No swelling (in veg or meat!) and the only annoyance was razor rash. I could possibly find a scar if I looked closely - or (just for T. and Ruth!!!) I could post a photo of the general area... :sick:
 
Talking of the "snip"
From the Darwin Awards page...

(May 2014, England) In the interest of public safety, Darwin Awards editors are releasing this ribald event to the public to serve as a warning to adventurous amorous males. The event was brought to our attention by an eyewitness, who provided additional details (withheld for privacy reasons) to confirm it.
"Being part of emergency services, firemen are called upon to get people out of unlikely situations. We were summoned to the A&E Department of a central London hospital to assist in removing a "thing ring." With our ring cutters at the ready, we were presented with the patient, his 'meat and two veg' extremely swollen and such a dark purple that they were almost blackened. The whole sorry mess was encircled by a thick titanium ring. Normally the procedure to remove a thing ring is a five-minute affair, but our cutters could not make a mark on the titanium! After expending a number of cutter blades we had to concede defeat.

"The man in question had put himself into this situation three days prior to committing himself to A&E, delaying the hospital visit due to embarrassment and a vain hope that it would resolve itself in time. Unfortunately this error in judgement cost him dearly. The wonderful doctors can often drain blood and remove the ring the way it went on--yet by the time he sought help, and our tools had been defeated, his jewels was past saving. Full castration--the result of the man's own actions and decisions--make this eunuch a self-selected nominee for a living Darwin Award.
 
Ouch :eek:
 
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