I understand your difficulty Roy, and I'm not sure there are any easy or reliable answers. Manufacturers often don't quote the data you need to make calculations, perhaps because they don't want you to know, and when it comes to very close shooting, like macro, the difference between the minimum focusing distance (measured from the focal plane/sensor, as quoted by manufacturers) and the one that matters, the minimum working distance (measured from the front of the lens, also used for DoF calcs) can be significantly different.
Traditionally we've always used focal length as the shorthand for field-of-view/angle-of-view and magnification, so the way I do it is to sit two lenses side by side and focused at a relevant distance, then measure the field-of-view and convert that to angle-of-view with a bit of basic trig. Then go to an on-line calculator and convert that to focal length.
From what I know though, it is clear that there are a few general trends that I think are grounds to raise questions, if not accurate answers. Super-zooms are one, like 18-200mm and more. The designers there are under great pressure to make them as compact as possible while still offering good close focusing. Given the choice of extending the lens in the conventional way, or shifting a few elements around inside to get the same effect (even at the expense of focal length) it's obvious which way is favourite.
Same goes for longer zooms, 100-400mm and 50-500mm etc, when the amount of physical extension necessary is much greater and combined with zooming demands as well, this imposes mechcanical difficulties as well as making the lens impractically long.
Without hard data, your opening assumption is probably not far off - if you want maximum reach at close range with a long lens, for small garden birds perhaps, then go for a prime. It's not a given, but I suspect there won't be too many exceptions.