farts.

I had a fartectomy so I can't any more :lol:
 
Doesnt stop you talking out of it though, Paul!! :D :lol:
 
:lol:

i love it .. if someone walks into one the look on there face .. i know its childish but ive been caught to many times :lol:

my oh my im laughing now writing this...:lol:

the swan neck as they move back saying ooowwwwww you dirty bast d now what i mean " ed34":naughty:
 
I probably shouldn't share this..... my ex-husband (note EX-husband) used to try regularly to disgust me! one time he did an impression of a revving motorbike with his farting. and I was doubled up laughing for ages! i have (thankfully) not seen or heard anything like it since! :lol:
 
This thread stinks..
Peepwall.gif
 
how sad are we?
i,ve spent many a happy hour trawling youtube for fart vids.
my oldest lad will often come into the room , just to fart.
i usualy reply with a thumbs up and "proud of you son".
i must get out more. mainly for the fresh air.:)

ladybird. harley or suzuki?:lol:
 
There is an ongoing trend at work to 'drop one' in someone else's office if they're not there, and close the door so it's waiting for them when they return. Thankfully, no-one in my department is a vegetarian, or on Atkins, as folks that fall in to either of those categories have some of the most putrid emissions imaginable.

Oh, and considering earlier posts, our resident foxy beauty Ladybird is surely too nice to fart.

She would 'puff' instead ;)
 
Best tactical use:
in an elevator on a hot day, about 10-15 seconds before you exit.
Leave it to go do your evil bidding! :>
 
I used to work in an office which was equiped with a "Fart Lock".
Two fire doors, about 8 feet apart in a narrow corridor. Each door was equiped with a window for our viewing pleasure and the fire door seals were like tupperware, they could keep a guff fresh for a good hour.
We would find a likely candidate from our team (usualy our manager who was world renowned for the putrid collection of dead rats he kept up his a**e) to go into the fart lock, deploy the H2S, burst the bubble (this is vital if you don't want it to be carried back to your desk clinging to your leg and usualy takes the form of "doing a little dance" on the spot.) and finally exit the fart lock without disturbing too much air.
Then just sit and wait for a victim. They usualy made it half way through before their face would melt but by then it was too late, the first door had swung shut behind them. Nothing left to do but claw at the window and slide to the floor :gag:
 
come on now - this is a photography forum - anyone got a picture of one? :lol:
 
spannerdude said:
I used to work in an office which was equiped with a "Fart Lock".
Two fire doors, about 8 feet apart in a narrow corridor. Each door was equiped with a window for our viewing pleasure and the fire door seals were like tupperware, they could keep a guff fresh for a good hour.
We would find a likely candidate from our team (usualy our manager who was world renowned for the putrid collection of dead rats he kept up his a**e) to go into the fart lock, deploy the H2S, burst the bubble (this is vital if you don't want it to be carried back to your desk clinging to your leg and usualy takes the form of "doing a little dance" on the spot.) and finally exit the fart lock without disturbing too much air.
Then just sit and wait for a victim. They usualy made it half way through before their face would melt but by then it was too late, the first door had swung shut behind them. Nothing left to do but claw at the window and slide to the floor :gag:
Click to expand...

ROFL!
 
If a clown farts does it smell funny?
 
parrrrrrrp! oh excuse me, :embarrassed:
 
My Mum & Dad always brought me up to call them poffles. Didn't make them smell any better though :exit:
 
digitalfailure said:
Joe.......thats your cue :lol:
Click to expand...
He had better not! :bat:

inaneredstripe said:
how sad are we?
i,ve spent many a happy hour trawling youtube for fart vids.
my oldest lad will often come into the room , just to fart.
i usualy reply with a thumbs up and "proud of you son".
i must get out more. mainly for the fresh air.:)

ladybird. harley or suzuki?:lol:
Click to expand...

Kawasaki :lol:

marky_h said:
There is an ongoing trend at work to 'drop one' in someone else's office if they're not there, and close the door so it's waiting for them when they return. Thankfully, no-one in my department is a vegetarian, or on Atkins, as folks that fall in to either of those categories have some of the most putrid emissions imaginable.

Oh, and considering earlier posts, our resident foxy beauty Ladybird is surely too nice to fart.

She would 'puff' instead ;)
Click to expand...
Thankyou!!! I'm a VEGETARIAN!!! :naughty:

Joe T said:
Understatement of the Month! :D
Click to expand...

Only ever in self defence or REVENGE!!!!
Anton Roland said:
:popcorn:


You are a brave man, Joe
Click to expand...

:p
 
Has anyone ever lit a fart? Once I laid such a good one whilst lying on my back, legs over my shoulders and lighter in hand, only problem was a backdraft that scorched my trousers.
 
fart-power.jpg



fart.jpg



And finally, never fart in a wetsuit......:D

WetSuitFart.jpg
 
My Nan used to say the best farts are SBD's..

Silent But Deadlys..... and my god was she an expert ! :gag:
 
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