Do the British have manners?

AJQS

AJQS

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Alan
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No
No!

I have spent the last 3 days at work, very long shifts of dealing with around 1500 customers per shift. I don't mind helping people at all, I will pretty much do anything for anyone, but I am starting to get really irritated by people ho seem to have no concept of simple politeness. In those 3 days a conversation was started with the words "excuse me" ONCE. Whilst I am busy working and surrounded by maybe 10 other people, all talking, I am supposed to know the guy furthest away is talking to ME all because he suddenly blurts out a question without even looking at me? :shrug:

Also if I'm unlucky enough to be on a till, due to sheer volume of customers or covering another staff member's break, it would be really nice and even helpful to yourselves if you could actually reply to me when I'm talking to you.

I greet EVERYONE with a "hello, how are you?" and only around 50% will even bother to look at me. "Would you like cashback?" Is usually greeted with a blank stare at the car machine and silence, followed by (every now and them) "Oh I wanted cashback" after the Enter PIN screen appears...

It's not just at work I have to deal with such people - I've had people phone up at home and blurt straight into "Is the cottage free this weekend?" without so much as a hello!

This may sound like customer service from hell at our shop, well I can guarantee it's not. Apart from one girl who I would sack if it wa sup to me, everyone gives first class customer service. I am now tailoring my customer service level to meet the customer, make an effort to at least say hello and you will leave wondering how you ever shopped anywhere else, ask a stupid question then expect an equal reply.

So to sum up, when SHopping, if you want to ask a shop assistant a question, make the effort to approach them and begin the conversation with "excuse me..", likewise say excuse if you wish to reach an item on a shelf that someone is filling, or would like an item to be passed to you, do not barge in or take from the box being filled from.

If someone says hello to you, at least say it back.

Have a little spacial awareness, don't stand in the aisle with yor trolley/pushchair/screamin gtoddler gawping at the shelves, other people actually have lives to be getting on with.

:thumbs:
 
To answer the question generally, no they don't - the nation in general has become ill-mannered, disrespectful, foul-mouthed, selfish and self-centred.
In respect to store/customer relationships, sadly the situation is little different with the customer often being viewed as a disruption to the working day.
 
I have to agree with gramps on this.I have a part time job with an estate agent showing people around houses.
They make an appointment ,are sent a text reminder on the day confirming the time and place. About 40% don't bother to turn up,don't ring to cancel and turn off their mobile so you can't contact them to see where they are!
The worst are the ones that turn up half an hour late when you have left then want to know why you aren't there to show them round.
Rank bad manners!
 
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thats some turnover of customers if my maths is right , 2 / min for 12 hours with no breaks , some going :eek: , anyway back to the subject , there is far to much of the 'me me me' attitude going on nowadays , does my head in , as for people working on tills , some of their attitudes leave a lot to be desired as well , had one the other day who barely grunted at me , she got got grunted back at ...........
 
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No, I'm certainly not going to ask you to "excuse me". Whatever for? I'll just say Good Morning/Afternoon and ask for your help.
 
generally speaking , manners have gotten quite bad indeed. most of the conversations seem systematic , using simple robotic words like - I .... NEED ... MILK for example. loads of people don't have respect. but on contrary - Uk has some of the genuinely nicest people I've ever met.
 
to the OP...like you i go out of my way to help eacha nd every customer and half the time you get nowt back. it is hard and annoying but then the nice comments more than make up for it.

Yesterday i had finished my shift was getting my shopping a customer wanted helpso i just helped which led to another customer wanting help ect ect ect... i was about 20 mins late leaving but the kind words made up for it..

mind you the bloke last week who thought it was ok to give my a load of lip got a shock when i told him to do one as i do not have to take it and i wasn't serving him...

in gerneral i think if you are polite most people are back..

can i ask everyone when you last took a bus ride did you say tank you to the driver???? my daughter ws mocked last week because does every time.

Terri
 
paulyoung666 said:
thats some turnover of customers if my maths is right , 2 / min for 12 hours with no breaks , some going :eek: , anyway back to the subject , there is far to much of the 'me me me' attitude going on nowadays , does my head in , as for people working on tills , some of their attitudes leave a lot to be desired as well , had one the other day who barely grunted at me , she got got grunted back at ...........
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I don't have to deal with every one, It's a big shop! We have a girl like that, and I can understand why anyone would talk that way to her, but I'm not like that, everyone is greeted with a smile, has bags ready and opened for them if I'm on the till, depending what they've got it's sometime even quicker for me to pack too and get them on their way.

MartynK said:
No, I'm certainly not going to ask you to "excuse me". Whatever for? I'll just say Good Morning/Afternoon and ask for your help.
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If I'm on a till that's fine, if I'm walking down a naisle with a giant box I can barely see over you'd have to say excuse me or you're only going to get a "Good morning/afternoon how are you?" back.

It's quite simple really - just those 2 words "excuse me" make it obvious you need help with something so we can get straight down to business.

The normal thing is for me to be down one end of an aisle working, for a customer to just come up and say "eggs" Nothing else, just eggs. Many a time I have been tempted to reply And eggs to you too, but so far I've resisted. I did relent one day when one womand on seeing the empty space between all the other full to the brim stacks of papers asked were there no Daily Mails today, I told her, no we don't sell them because the boss doesn't agree with their political views. The weird thing is she thought that seemed normal! :lol:

I don't think people's rudeness has gone up or down over the years, it just seems to be that Brits whilst shopping seem to be incapable of being polite. (Nor can seem to manage to opend a car door without whacking mine, but that's a rant for another day! :lol:)
 
The words "please" and "thank you" don't appear to be taught at school nowadays. As for basic good manners, or respect for one's elders.....:shake:
 
Sorry, I have worked in retail one way or another since I left school. It does seem that you have got a bee in your bonnet over this. Just accept that a lot of people think shop workers are below them, be polite to everyone and you soon find that you will have customers look for you on checkouts as you are polite, this soon means shifts go quicker as you are having a laugh with regular customers. No matter what line of work you are in, you will always get some utter t**** you have to deal with.
 
Davec223 said:
................ No matter what line of work you are in, you will always get some utter t**** you have to deal with.
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ha .. you should have been in Glasgow after the Celtic/Rangers game yesterday

I quit work at 2PM after the umpteenth drunk ned saying ''All the f==== English are wa**kers''

er it was a Scottish game............:thinking:

haha ...south Glasgow taxi driver...from Wales...:lol:
 
I've worked in motor sales for 7 years and to be honest it's the same now as it was then, you get the arrogant few but we have more nice customers than bad that you would bend over backwards for.

As said a thank you or a smile never goes a miss and we try and make the buying experience as fun as it can be, on the plus side we do get a lot of repeat business.

Had an absolutely cracking day today, understaffed and a lot more customers than anticipated but was great to see customers borrowing each others children to see just how many children you could comfortably fit in each model of car!
 
I spend most of my time in shops running away from the false cheerfulness over eager sales staff, not looking for them to help me. I think the idea that sales staff are on commission and only out to get the most cash from you accounts for a lot of the 'reserve' you encounter in customers. That said, common courtesy costs nothing, I have in a far past life been that sales person and a pleasant customer got far better service from me than any other.
 
Flash In The Pan said:
The words "please" and "thank you" don't appear to be taught at school nowadays. As for basic good manners, or respect for one's elders.....:shake:
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I can't comment on any other classrooms, but they are taught in my class of 4 year olds. Seems to fall on deaf ears most of the time though. It seems that if they don't need it at home, why bother anywhere else :(

The amount of times I have witnessed children leaving the school door at home time and demanding, arm outstretched, "sweets" and then given a bag without any words from the parents. No "Hello", no "how was your day?"

Parenting skills are required to encourage what is taught in school.
 
Dont you just love it when you go into a convenence shop and take your purchases to the counter where the guy is gabbering away on his mobile phone, takes your money, tills it up, gives you your change and turns his back on you, all without interupting his conversation :nono:
 
I have manners, so **** you! ;)

Used to work in IT Support at a secondary school, teachers and students demanding you fix things they have broken out of their ignorance and stupidity.
Some were appreciative, most were not, barely even acknowledging our existence.
 
What pone55es me off is when a staff member breaks off a conversation or transaction with me to answer the phone. I have even walked out on a transaction, explaining that I had bothered actually being there to gather information for myself rather than jumping the queue for advice by using one of the rudest inventions ever created.
 
Flash In The Pan said:
The words "please" and "thank you" don't appear to be taught at school nowadays. As for basic good manners, or respect for one's elders.....:shake:
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what have they to do with school teachings?
It's from the home - manners, courtesy, your everyday behavioural stuff you get from your parents, or at least should.
 
regarding the OP, i'm usually very polite to all shop staff I approach but almost try to avoid them when i walk into a shop.
Why?
I want to avoid leading questions which are designed only to see if i am going to buy what;s on special this week or will return the most commission to the salesperson...that's ignoring other times when I am followed around a shop by a salesperson, ignored when I finally buy something or get my change flung at me.

However yes, simple courtesy costs nothing and even if it's a nod and smile at the asda 'greeter', or being open to a genuine conversation, I have no issue generally with people who work in shops. I used to do it also and recognise even a genuine Thank-you can make a lot of difference.
 
Good manners should be instilled at all stages, home and school - problem is that those who should be instilling the manners have lost the gift.
 
Flash In The Pan said:
The words "please" and "thank you" don't appear to be taught at school nowadays. As for basic good manners, or respect for one's elders.....:shake:
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hangerhead said:
what have they to do with school teachings?
It's from the home - manners, courtesy, your everyday behavioural stuff you get from your parents, or at least should.
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I agree with Graham (FITP) maybe we should bring back the cane or even the birch :$ might change a few "manners" on people....

I always say "please & thankyou" if I dont get a thankQ in response then I usually mumble quite loudly to the person that manners dont cost anything and just walk off :razz: :lol:
 
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I think that we are all guilty of bad manners from time to time, I know that I am guilty of bad manners, especially when driving, in fact not me but only today ad a major island the guy in a flashy merc pulled up to late and ended up blocking to road holding up a lot of cars and the proceeded to cut up 6 cars buy deciding that he should atop there as apposed to backing up, a couple of the drivers that were blocked justifiably sounded there horns only to be greeted by the finger from said berk
 
What annoys me about those who work in retail is the stupid questions they ask you. Like when I buy a paper and sandwich at a petrol station and say "Just these", they then say "any fuel". Errr, what part of just these do you not understand? Or the fact that I may buy 6 items in tesco and get asked if I want any help packing?? Or the times you have an trolly load of shopping and they give you 4 bags.

Not an excuse to be rude, but sometimes people do ask stupid things.
 
Goneforagasper said:
Dont you just love it when you go into a convenence shop and take your purchases to the counter where the guy is gabbering away on his mobile phone, takes your money, tills it up, gives you your change and turns his back on you, all without interupting his conversation :nono:
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:plusone:
 
cambsno said:
What annoys me about those who work in retail is the stupid questions they ask you. Like when I buy a paper and sandwich at a petrol station and say "Just these", they then say "any fuel". Errr, what part of just these do you not understand? Or the fact that I may buy 6 items in tesco and get asked if I want any help packing?? Or the times you have an trolly load of shopping and they give you 4 bags.

Not an excuse to be rude, but sometimes people do ask stupid things.
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look to the management for your answers , not the poor **** on the till , asda for instance have a policy at our local store of not allowing staff to 'fluff' bags and have them waiting ready for customers , they have to be offered , all in the name of the great god 'profit' ..............
 
My wife has worked in retail for the past 30+ years, in both small corner shops and (more recently) in major retail stores. There is hardly a day that goes by when she doesn't come home with at least one story of customer rudeness. I have witnessed it myself when I've gone into the store where she works to let her know I'm waiting outside to take her home at the end of her shift.

She greets customers with a smile and a cheery hello, makes eye contact (provided the customer can bother to look her way) and asks if they need any assistance - she's won awards for her customer service - yet regularly gets verbal abuse in return.

Why does she put up with it? Because overall she enjoys her job and the customers that respond in a civilised manner make it worthwhile :)
 
Trig's said:
I agree with Graham (FITP) maybe we should bring back the cane or even the birch :$ might change a few "manners" on people....

I always say "please & thankyou" if I dont get a thankQ in response then I usually mumble quite loudly to the person that manners dont cost anything and just walk off :razz: :lol:
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There is no need for violence if there is correct upbringing and teaching of morals from very early childhood.

Violence is a shoddy method of trying to correct the underlying problem which is crap parenting. And as a child who was on the receiving end of it, violence doesn't do young people any good in the long run. You either become withdrawn and grow up with confidence issues or you become like yourself, an advocate of more violence.


cambsno said:
What annoys me about those who work in retail is the stupid questions they ask you. Like when I buy a paper and sandwich at a petrol station and say "Just these", they then say "any fuel". Errr, what part of just these do you not understand? Or the fact that I may buy 6 items in tesco and get asked if I want any help packing?? Or the times you have an trolly load of shopping and they give you 4 bags.

Not an excuse to be rude, but sometimes people do ask stupid things.
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There are no stupid questons, only stupid answers. People ASK questions because they are unsure of something.


As for the actual discussion at hand, the thread title, no i don't think many people in this country have appropriate manners. It doesn't take much effort to start a conversation with "hi how you doing", etc.
 
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you lot must all live in some very shoddy areas of the country, where I live it's nothing like what you lot describe, people are generally polite and helpful.

I wonder how many of you live in the unfriendly south of england :D
 
Alan Clogwyn said:
Have a little spacial awareness, don't stand in the aisle with yor trolley/pushchair/screamin gtoddler gawping at the shelves, other people actually have lives to be getting on with.
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It amuses (and annoys) me how groups of store managers breeze down the aisles with little regard for their customers.
 
Trig's said:
I agree with Graham (FITP) maybe we should bring back the cane or even the birch :$ might change a few "manners" on people....

I always say "please & thankyou" if I dont get a thankQ in response then I usually mumble quite loudly to the person that manners dont cost anything and just walk off :razz: :lol:
Click to expand...

Bring a cane or the birch near me and manners are the last thing you can expect to get in return ;)
 
Goneforagasper said:
Dont you just love it when you go into a convenence shop and take your purchases to the counter where the guy is gabbering away on his mobile phone, takes your money, tills it up, gives you your change and turns his back on you, all without interupting his conversation :nono:
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Get this all the time in this area. I have to say I have worked inretail too, and have seen first hand the rudeness and the aggression. On the other hand I have seen sales assistants who seem to care not one jot whether you live or die, let alone get the bottle of milk you want.....
 
I get annoyed when I nip to the shop, go to the till and the person is sat there nattering to someone else while I just stand there waiting to be served.

Andddd when you hold your hand out for change, and they plonk it down on the counter :bang:
 
I visit the same BP garage every morning to get my coffee and fuel on my way to work. They ask the same questions every morning

Do you have a nectar card- no I don't.
Would you like one - no thanks.
Would you like a muffin at half price with the coffee - no thank you.

I am usually very polite but having the same questions asked every morning can be annoying. I did once speak to one of the ladies and she said because I go there every morning they know exactly what my response will be but they have to ask me anyway as otherwise they could get in trouble with their manager. Apparently he sits in the office watching his staff on the cctv cameras :)
 
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