Creativity and depression

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petemc

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So I'm one of those depressed types. Before my exhibition I was quite low. Why in gods name would anyone want to see my work? Despite the success I was low about my book for the same reasons. Despite all that its very easy to feel low about my work. But is strange. My work has both inspired and moved people. Is depression a key factor? Does it make me strive to do better and go so far simply because I feel its not that good?

Most of all though where is all this coming from? It doesn't seem logical or possible. Why is it that I can be out and suddenly go from depressed to capturing something beautiful in a few seconds? Why do I see the world this way? Why do I see it as this amazing place with fantastic light to play with and yet feel so down? Its fustrating as hell. A classic time would be when I was at Creamfields. I bumped into these two stunning girls, flirted a bit as I often do and got some fun photos of them. For 2 minutes I'm inspired and then its gone. How does that happen? Where does that come from? Is that the sheer power of inspiration overriding depression? Despite feeling like life isn't worth living you catch a glimpse of something that has to be photographed and you suddenly come alive. Transformed from a waste of a person into talent, skill and focused ability. You get the photos and for a brief moment you're happy. Then its gone. What is the point in that?

I wonder how many other artists there are that have been this way?
 
Aye. They are great. Is that due to depression in some way perhaps?
 
Milligan was a manic depressive I believe. Forgive me if there is a newer title for th conditi but thats the on I know.

My brother, who writes the most amazing poetry and is himself an excellent artist, also suffers from manic depresion. Artistic talent and depression do seem to go hand in hand sometimes it seems.
 
New title for manic depressive is Bipolar. I want a bipolar I don't carebear :D Dark Star, is your brothers poetry dark and perhaps depressive or not? Its interesting how many depressed people seem to have this amazing ability to inspire, create beauty and make people happy.
 
It's not something I suffer from and don't really understand but it does seem to occur quite a lot with talented people.

Dark Star - the current name for it is bipolar disorder. Stephen Fry suffers from it too. His autobiography, even though it is only about the first twenty years or so of his life, was a fascinating read and goes some way to explaining the frustrations he felt when he was growing up.
 
petemc said:
New title for manic depressive is Bipolar. I want a bipolar I don't carebear :D Dark Star, is your brothers poetry dark and perhaps depressive or not? Its interesting how many depressed people seem to have this amazing ability to inspire, create beauty and make people happy.
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Sample some in here and here - its varied: funny, uplifting, dark on occasion depressing....perhaps some clues in there into why he is how he is....?
 
The artistic world is littered with depressives throughout history. It's kind of hard if you have the slightest senitivity within, not to feel depressed when you look at the the mess your fellow man is making of the world, and has allways done.

The creation of any kind of art requires a level of insight, knowledge, hard work and skill that induces a high, is it any suprise that afterwards there's a come down :)
 
A lot of creative people are Bipolar - remember when you couldn't turn on the telly without seeing Tony Slattery, then he would disappear for 6 months, only to reappear? Same with Stephen Fry, Jim Carrey and many others.

Depression is a terrible curse and massively misunderstood, many people will laugh at a depressive, but would they do the same to someone with cancer? It may seem outrageous to compare depression to cancer, but it's no less dangerous and no less capable of taking a life.

To me bipolar depression would be scarier than the run of the mill kind (horrible though that is), the descent from mania to deep depression must be a very scary experience.
 
Bob Carlos Clarke was another one. Brilliant photographer. I read his autobiography and he was driven to find his next model. He didn't use pro models and found them lacking. He didn't like that they "turned it on and off for the camera" but instead he used to get waitresses and people he met on trains to model for him. He wanted the real deal.

I did notice that Bailey also made a comment about women who modelled for him. For the time they were infront of his camera he was in love with them, nothing else mattered.

It was almost a possession thing with both of them, they "owned" that person infront of the lens.

It does seem to go with comedy and creativity throughout history though.
 
I'm not sure the cndition is limited to creating people. I think creative people have a way to express it whereas others don't so they are not always apparent.

MAybe?
 
I have Cyclothalmia which is a milder form of Bipolar.

On looking back through the '90s I cant believe what I was like..it was just like a loonggg periods of mania. Then it suddenly stopped and I was so down that last year I had a mental breakdown.

I am the life and soul of a party, making everyone laugh all night, Im on a complete high and loving it..................then suddenly I want to go home, I don't want to be with anybody else at all and everyone makes me angry.

Well, the only bit that is different with me, is that I am no comic or photographic genius unfortunately!! :)
 
the-tears-of-a-clown.jpg
 
AndyB said:
I'm not sure the cndition is limited to creating people
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It's not an act I've ever linked to depression;)

Interesting point of view though (what you originally intended).
 
It reminds me of a different song actually- Otis Redding's "Dock of the Bay" which people seem to think is a cheery song for some reason.....
 
Pah you know what I meant :-)
 
Was diagnosed with depression last year. I also have periods of being on a high followed very quickly by a sharp low. Not sure if it makes me bipolar or manic depressive though. As far as creativity is concerned it probably works as a good outlet for depressives but I think you have to be creative to start off with.
 
I think there's a danger in believing that all great art has to come from some dark place or that people have to have inner demons to confront.

It's true for some - it isn't true for all. Some comics have a good time on and off the stage, not every poet starves in the garret.

I do think though that there is great creativity to be found in confronting what other people shy away from - whether consciously or not.
 
I dont tend to comment on Pete's posts anymore, but having just been diagnosed with depression I feel the need to stand up at that last post by a1ex2001 and turn around and find it highly inappropriate and offensive.

I am a poetry writer, and dealt with my teenage depression and battle of self-harm through creative expression. I like to think of my Photography as an extension of that.
My 365, follows my ups and downs, and I know Marc's does the same.

I feel the need to "stand up" and be outspoken for small-minded people who just think that "life could be worse" and to "just cheer up"
 
Yes it could but thats no consolation for someone sufferring. I don't suffer but I am close to some who do and it's not difficult to see the effect.
 
Dark Star said:
Sample some in here and here - its varied: funny, uplifting, dark on occasion depressing....perhaps some clues in there into why he is how he is....?
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I'll take a look dude. I used to write poems in 6th form. Everyone was like "Wow these are all dark, depressing and about death." Funny how no-one ever asked if I was ok :) To be honest I didn't really think that anything was wrong.

Flash In The Pan said:
Depression is a terrible curse and massively misunderstood, many people will laugh at a depressive, but would they do the same to someone with cancer? It may seem outrageous to compare depression to cancer, but it's no less dangerous and no less capable of taking a life.

To me bipolar depression would be scarier than the run of the mill kind (horrible though that is), the descent from mania to deep depression must be a very scary experience.
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You know I don't take it as seriously, despite knowing what goes on inside my head and reading about Bob Carlos Clarke. I hate the term "suffering" despite that being true. Maybe I don't wanna admit.

AliB said:
Bob Carlos Clarke was another one. Brilliant photographer. I read his autobiography and he was driven to find his next model. He didn't use pro models and found them lacking. He didn't like that they "turned it on and off for the camera" but instead he used to get waitresses and people he met on trains to model for him. He wanted the real deal.
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I can identify with that. I've done a few shoots recently and both the client and I agreed that the streets of Liverpool are filled with amazing characters that we wanted for the shoot but they weren't pro models. We ended up hiring 2 and nabbing a girl from their office because she was amazing looking.

I did notice that Bailey also made a comment about women who modelled for him. For the time they were infront of his camera he was in love with them, nothing else mattered.
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I've heard that by others too. Its a dance. Its ok to be in the moment and to be attracted by the person. They are your inspiration and you also have to inspire them to some what. That is easier if you find them amazing.

Janice said:
I have Cyclothalmia which is a milder form of Bipolar.
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I'm thinking, from reading, that that's what I have. My mates have often said that I'm like 2 people and they never know which they'll get. But I'm on NHS waiting lists which is fun. For all I know I could just be insane :D

I am the life and soul of a party, making everyone laugh all night, Im on a complete high and loving it..................then suddenly I want to go home, I don't want to be with anybody else at all and everyone makes me angry.
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I get exactly that. Best friends of 20 years suddenly annoy the hell out of me. Then I'm sarcastic as hell at them. I've tried to explain that its me but it didn't work and I've lost friends. Its like a light switch. Light to dark instantly for no good reason.
 
I am classified as bi-polar. In and out of hospital through the 2000's, overdoses, mania, happiness. Been like this since I was about 5 years old.

Major pattern through my life and my teens were mental.

Always looking for something but always thinking about calling it a day. It is always there, never goes away. My photography has been my tool but I can feel that slipping away at the moment, but that could be in my head.
 
a1ex2001 said:
Just cheer up, life could be worse ffs.
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Wow its so simple. I have to cheer up. Awesome. I'm cured \o/ Oh wait wait no depression kicking in. Life is now worse. Time to find a bus to roll under \o/
 
petemc said:
I'll take a look dude. I used to write poems in 6th form. Everyone was like "Wow these are all dark, depressing and about death." Funny how no-one ever asked if I was ok :) To be honest I didn't really think that anything was wrong.
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That reminds me of something that happened to me when I was 14. I wrote a poem about self-harm etc, and one of the teachers read it, his response "Tell me this doesnt mean, what I think it means" I smiled and replied "it doesnt mean what you think it means" and walked away. Nothing more was ever said, and I continued self-harming for another 4-years.
 
Diego Garcia said:
Always looking for something but always thinking about calling it a day. It is always there, never goes away. My photography has been my tool but I can feel that slipping away at the moment, but that could be in my head.
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Don't make me come up there and take you out for a meal with Mr and Mrs Pain.

It's not slipping away, it's in your head. You just went a bit kit-nuts for a while - and we've all done that.

I've been lucky enough to only ever feel a bit low - never properly depressed - but feel enormous sympathy for those that do. Posters like 'alex' aren't even worthy of a response that their peanut-like brains could comprehend.
 
a1ex2001 said:
Just cheer up, life could be worse ffs.
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Ever told someone with a broken leg to 'get walking....at least you have one'?

No? Thought not, depression is no different. It's a chemical imbalance in the brain and something that is not you can just 'snap out of'
 
Radiohead said:
Posters like 'alex' aren't even worthy of a response that their peanut-like brains could comprehend.
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I'm actually glad he posted his comment as it illustrates my point perfectly. Many of the general populace don't see depression as an illness, but just as a little phase of unhappiness, something that you'll "snap out of" or that can be fixed by a bit of retail therapy - I've tried that, it doesn't work, but I'll keep trying until I have all the camera gear I want....
 
Deleted.
 
While were on the subject, iv been a bit depressive for a while, ever since leaving the army actually!! this last year has seen a marked increase in severity! so much so my doc has put me on pills!

I wonder if these creative subjects actually CAUSE depression or maybe make it worse?? perhaps its where someone that needs to be good at the things they do, all the arty types i know want/need to be good at whatever they do!! otherwise whats the point eh? anyway, its only the ones that sell thier soul to the Devil that are naturally great so the rest have to struggle because all the arty subject are BLOODY HARD to master!! it causes frustration! leading to low self-esteem and depression..

These are just ideas and by no means what i believe, although i do think there is something in it..

If it were just a case of cheering up.. well... lets leave it there.. one ban this year is enough... ;)
 
Flash In The Pan said:
I'm actually glad he posted his comment as it illustrates my point perfectly. Many of the general populace don't see depression as an illness, but just as a little phase of unhappiness, something that you'll "snap out of" or that can be fixed by a bit of retail therapy - I've tried that, it doesn't work, but I'll keep trying until I have all the camera gear I want....
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Likewise many, who are simply 'fed up', say they are suffering from depression!

There is a whole world of difference!!! :thumbsdown:
 
Dark Star said:
Likewise many, who are simply 'fed up', say they are suffering from depression!

There is a whole world of difference!!! :thumbsdown:
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Funny you should says that, one of my friends just emailed me a minute ago to say she is feeling "depressed", because she is back from her holidays....
 
Flash In The Pan said:
Funny you should says that, one of my friends just emailed me a minute ago to say she is feeling "depressed", because she is back from her holidays....
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Ha ha!

I, like many, didnt know what depression meant. Thought it was fed up.

Then when finally the house was to be repossesed it all came to a head and I just blew. I would cry every time I opened my mouth, screamed in anger at my husband and kids, didnt want anyone in the same room, loud noises made me clap my hands over my ears, doing small things like typing made me feel that things were closing in on me and I had to leap up from my seat and get outside.

It may all sound funny but it was happening all day every day for nearly 6 months. Not a case of being fed up at all.
 
Janice said:
Ha ha!

I, like many, didnt know what depression meant. Thought it was fed up.

Then when finally the house was to be repossesed it all came to a head and I just blew. I would cry every time I opened my mouth, screamed in anger at my husband and kids, didnt want anyone in the same room, loud noises made me clap my hands over my ears, doing small things like typing made me feel that things were closing in on me and I had to leap up from my seat and get outside.

It may all sound funny but it was happening all day every day for nearly 6 months. Not a case of being fed up at all.
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Janice, my friend suffers with really severe depression, and we have a phrase between us to let us know what mood we're in. Generally goes on "xxxx has just managed to destroy my universe" generally by doing nothing much.

Our families/partners now ask, "Are you angry at me or the space I'm stood in" which generally helps to determine whether they should take it personally :)
 
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