Confiding in people

Wheels

Wheels

Julian Keeler
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Julian
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If you are a miserable b****r like me, do you find it easier to confide to someone you dont know? Do you air your troubles online? (I do to a degree plenty I wouldnt post on a forum)

If your stuck in the house 99% of the time how do you occupy your time?

I stew over things for weeks/months at a time over what most of you would call silly or trivial, but from where Im sat they are huge hurdles.
 
I spend a lot of time on a particular car forum, and have been registered on there for nearly 10 years, as have a lot of the other users. Although many of us have never met, there are times when people (myself included) post quite personal stories (kids in hospital, relatives passing away etc) and it's quite amazing at the support you get back.

When my little girl (2 yrs old) had to have an operation recently I was utterly petrified about it. I mentioned it to a few friends but not many - didn't think they'd really be too interested/bothered. Posted about it on the (car) forum and was amazed at all the kind words and support from people. So much so I printed it off and showed my wife. Ditto when my wife ran the London Marathon a couple of months back, very personal reason for her doing it and I was so proud of her I mentioned that on the forum, and again, overwhelming response from people.

Forums can be pretty cool - as you now know! :)

ETA: I dare say it's a bit of a bloke thing (but not exclusively) as we're not known for sharing our feelings very well are we? It's kinda easier when you just type it and don't have to say it to someone's face!
 
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I have a few 'internet friends' that I've met from places and am v unlikely to ever meet, as such I can basically say anything to them, which makes them an amazing sounding board :D
 
Honestly, my computer is my window to the outside world.

Often I'll not go far - if I go out at all. For over a week I haven't left the street - and many of those days I haven't left the flat. Some days I'm not well enough to face the outside world and so be it, though it upsets me when I've mentally made plans to do something and on the day, by the time I've pulled myself around, it's evening - great for sunset shots in the summer and night time shots :lol:

I'm having a rough week this week, other weeks I can do 2 or 3 things. But for weeks like this week, my computer is my outside world.

I try not to moan or make an issue of things, I'm "funny" about who I confide in, but I'm always upfront. I don't see the point in hiding the obvious.

Hope that makes sense?
 
I keep my private life off the various forums I go on, but tbh I do love reading about other people's.

As for confiding... why not see this thread? ;)
 
I've had several periods of depression, the first lasted around eight years when I went through a nine month period of never leaving the house, no matter how hard I tried. Then a few years ago I slumped again. Having been quite open about this on forums I've found many fellow sufferers and met up with them all over the country for photography meets. For me spending too much time indoors is very risky as the stir crazy feeling hits after a few hours, so I have to be careful spending time at the computer, but for me being open helps.
 
I know what you mean about the pc being a lifeline. I have not been out since last sunday. Like nat this week ems me has been so hard for me. I know it may appear that i am miserable and to a degree i am. the depression and ptsd have both nearly cost my life. I feel safe behind a screen and behind my phone.
 
Wheels said:
I know what you mean about the pc being a lifeline. I have not been out since last sunday. Like nat this week ems me has been so hard for me. I know it may appear that i am miserable and to a degree i am. the depression and ptsd have both nearly cost my life. I feel safe behind a screen and behind my phone.
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Don't forget the asbestos laptop-mat next time though...eh?
 
Arkady said:
Don't forget the asbestos laptop-mat next time though...eh?
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Might not be needed mate. I had it on for half an hour last night just connected to the lappy no battery in and it was smelling of burning. Laptop not adapter
 
The right forums can be a good outlet...

I've been single for the last 7 years and used to be seriously in debt, I have focussed every thing around my job, I've been first in, last out and until the last 6 months I had worked pretty much every day off to make sure I made the money I needed and got where I think/thought I needed to be.

The plus side is my debts are pretty much all paid off and in a manageable level, I've bought my house (albeit on a mortgage with a 30% deposit) and can now afford a few toys here and there and get a new car through work on a more than regularl basis (helpful as a petrolhead).

The downside, I have been living in a lovely area for two years but know nobody local, I have a handful of good friends who I speak to once in a blue moon and of course am single which I personally hate!

I've been on nuermous forums throughout those years and they have helped me through some extremely difficult times, as mentioned earlier the support and comments made by online aquantences has been amazing, would I post personal stuff online? Definately if I felt comfortable on the forum in question, would I do so on TP, definately.
 
I have depression, had it for years before I finally flipped and started treatment. As I started to improve I realised I needed to keep getting out of the house! So I got a dog. The need to keep taking him out has helped me enormously, plus the drugs and shrink!
 
TinaC said:
I have depression, had it for years before I finally flipped and started treatment. As I started to improve I realised I needed to keep getting out of the house! So I got a dog. The need to keep taking him out has helped me enormously, plus the drugs and shrink!
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I would love a dog, I always had one until I started in the motor trade where the hours just don't allow! Luckily my boss and wife (who also works in the Dealership) got a dog a year ago who comes to work everyday, he's great when you need a quick five minute break to get your head back together :D

Don't get a lot of time to visit the folks and the family dogs unfortunately...
 
NissanMan

The downside, I have been living in a lovely area for two years but know nobody local, I have a handful of good friends who I speak to once in a blue moon and of course am single which I personally hate!
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Seems you went to the same T-Shirt shop.

I've been on my own now for 7 years, living in a house that my ex wife chose. I live here because it's the only option I have. I too hate to be on my own but up until recently I coped with it. As I come up to 50 this year I'm finding it harder so I'm now trying to learn to live with it because thats probably my lot.
Financially I was left knackered taking on £16k worth of debts and paying out 10K to her to keep the house.
I now owe Egg about £2k but I cope with that.

My Camera kit and the web are my solice most of the time, I too suffer from depression but manage without pills and potions.

We are British, we have a stiff upper lip, blokes don't cry. Thats all rubbish. If you don't find a way to vent your anger, share your bad and good times, to let out the pain then your life becomes hell.

Recently the pressure here built up to a level where the steam safety valve has blown. I just sit and shed a tear or two, take a day out of life and then dig in again and get going.

Talking to those that you do know and those that don't eases the strain.

I've been off this week and done nothing, I hate bad weather but hey such is life :D
 
Don't worry Ryan..you can pop round for supper (well that's what we call it anyway) sometime:D..if you can put up with my to kids! Seriously!

Wheels..unfortunately I struggle to confide in anyone sadly..which can be difficult as I too suffer from severe depression and PTSD which has often left me in very dark places...
 
ChrisH said:
NissanMan



Seems you went to the same T-Shirt shop.

I've been on my own now for 7 years, living in a house that my ex wife chose. I live here because it's the only option I have. I too hate to be on my own but up until recently I coped with it. As I come up to 50 this year I'm finding it harder so I'm now trying to learn to live with it because thats probably my lot.
Financially I was left knackered taking on £16k worth of debts and paying out 10K to her to keep the house.
I now owe Egg about £2k but I cope with that.

My Camera kit and the web are my solice most of the time, I too suffer from depression but manage without pills and potions.

We are British, we have a stiff upper lip, blokes don't cry. Thats all rubbish. If you don't find a way to vent your anger, share your bad and good times, to let out the pain then your life becomes hell.

Recently the pressure here built up to a level where the steam safety valve has blown. I just sit and shed a tear or two, take a day out of life and then dig in again and get going.

Talking to those that you do know and those that don't eases the strain.

I've been off this week and done nothing, I hate bad weather but hey such is life :D
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Chris if you ever fancied popping here when ya got a face like a slapped asre :p as my mrs puts it. Your more than welcome, infact u dont have to be miserable to pop up for a coffee and a chat:thumbs:
 
Julian

I will make arrangements to come over and meet you but it will probably be in a week or so.

I've loads on at the moment trying to get my health in order and get life back on track.

Believe me I'm looking forward to meeting you.

Tommorow I'm off for an MRI scan on my camera arm, hopefully to find out why after 8 years my shoulder still gives me hell from an injury. I'm not scared of what it involves but I have to be at the hospital at 8:00am and I am terrible at getting up in the morning.

Probably as I will be up I'll go over to the Flash after some coffee and breakfast.

Then I may go over and have a look at the ST Helens Willy.

Anyone who doesn't know what I mean, google map the ST Helens area of the M62 but be prepared to chuckle.

:D






By the way I mean absolutel no disrespect to those the monument memorialises


http://www.google.co.uk/images?hl=e...esult_group&ct=title&resnum=5&ved=0CDsQsAQwBA
 
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ChrisH said:
Julian

I will make arrangements to come over and meet you but it will probably be in a week or so.

I've loads on at the moment trying to get my health in order and get life back on track.

Believe me I'm looking forward to meeting you.

Tommorow I'm off for an MRI scan on my camera arm, hopefully to find out why after 8 years my shoulder still gives me hell from an injury. I'm not scared of what it involves but I have to be at the hospital at 8:00am and I am terrible at getting up in the morning.

Probably as I will be up I'll go over to the Flash after some coffee and breakfast.

Then I may go over and have a look at the ST Helens Willy.

Anyone who doesn't know what I mean, google map the ST Helens area of the M62 but be prepared to chuckle.

:D
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lol no prob anytime matey
 
I'm glad to see people talking about their problems on here. I have found online forums very helpful over the years when coping with my grief and other stuff. Sometimes it is easier to talk to people you cant see and dont really know.TP seems to be a very friendly site.

There does seem to be a huge gap in NHS help for people with psychological problems.However it should be possible to get treatment for PTSD. It is treatable, though takes a lot of work on the part of the patient as well as the therapist.

I am quite happy to talk to people as a friend, in confidence, if anyone wants to send me a pm.

Sue
 
ladysue said:
I'm glad to see people talking about their problems on here. I have found online forums very helpful over the years when coping with my grief and other stuff. Sometimes it is easier to talk to people you cant see and dont really know.TP seems to be a very friendly site.

There does seem to be a huge gap in NHS help for people with psychological problems.However it should be possible to get treatment for PTSD. It is treatable, though takes a lot of work on the part of the patient as well as the therapist.

I am quite happy to talk to people as a friend, in confidence, if anyone wants to send me a pm.

Sue
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Im waiting for my treatment to start for ptsd, luckily I have managed to be seen by a top RAF shrink and hopefully starting EDMR (I think its called) in the near future.
 
ChrisH said:
share your bad and good times
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Probably an inappropriate moment of levity for this thread, but first time I read this I could've sworn it said "share your bed and good times". Suppose that might be some grain of truth in that too... :thinking:
 
ChrisH said:
Julian

I will make arrangements to come over and meet you but it will probably be in a week or so.

I've loads on at the moment trying to get my health in order and get life back on track.

Believe me I'm looking forward to meeting you.

Tommorow I'm off for an MRI scan on my camera arm, hopefully to find out why after 8 years my shoulder still gives me hell from an injury. I'm not scared of what it involves but I have to be at the hospital at 8:00am and I am terrible at getting up in the morning.

Probably as I will be up I'll go over to the Flash after some coffee and breakfast.

Then I may go over and have a look at the ST Helens Willy.

Anyone who doesn't know what I mean, google map the ST Helens area of the M62 but be prepared to chuckle.

:D






By the way I mean absolutel no disrespect to those the monument memorialises


http://www.google.co.uk/images?hl=e...esult_group&ct=title&resnum=5&ved=0CDsQsAQwBA
Click to expand...

I live 2 miles away from the Willy, pass it everyday. What a bloody joke lol.
 
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