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I reall cannot believe I'm typing this aleardy it seems like only yesterday
I was boring the hell outta you.................
heres a couple
food for thought?
'Well you see,it's like this . . . A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo.
And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first.
This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health
of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.
In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells.
Now, as we know, excessive intake of alcohol kills brain cells.
But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way,
regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine! ...
And that is why you always feel smarter after a few beers.'
.....................................................................
Jacqueline and her husband Marc went for counselling after 25 years of marriage.
When asked what the problem was, Jacqueline went into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the 25 years they had been married.
She went on and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable,
an entire laundry list of unmet needs she had endured over the course of their marriage.
Finally, after allowing this to go on for a sufficient length of time, the therapist got up,
walked around the desk and, after asking Jacqueline to stand, unbuttoned her blouse, embraced her, put his hands on her breasts, and kissed her passionately
as her husband Marc watched with a raised eyebrow.
Jacqueline shut up, buttoned up her blouse, and quietly sat down as though in a daze.
The therapist turned to Marc and said, 'This is what your wife needs at least three times a week. Can you do this?'
Marc thought for a moment and replied, 'Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on Fridays, I play golf."
I was boring the hell outta you.................
heres a couple
food for thought?
'Well you see,it's like this . . . A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo.
And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first.
This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health
of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.
In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells.
Now, as we know, excessive intake of alcohol kills brain cells.
But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way,
regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine! ...
And that is why you always feel smarter after a few beers.'
.....................................................................
Jacqueline and her husband Marc went for counselling after 25 years of marriage.
When asked what the problem was, Jacqueline went into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the 25 years they had been married.
She went on and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable,
an entire laundry list of unmet needs she had endured over the course of their marriage.
Finally, after allowing this to go on for a sufficient length of time, the therapist got up,
walked around the desk and, after asking Jacqueline to stand, unbuttoned her blouse, embraced her, put his hands on her breasts, and kissed her passionately
as her husband Marc watched with a raised eyebrow.
Jacqueline shut up, buttoned up her blouse, and quietly sat down as though in a daze.
The therapist turned to Marc and said, 'This is what your wife needs at least three times a week. Can you do this?'
Marc thought for a moment and replied, 'Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on Fridays, I play golf."
... every flippin' time ... :razz:
