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Cobra

Cobra

In Memoriam. TPer Emeritus
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Old people have problems you haven't even considered yet!

An 85-year-old man was requested by his doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical exam.
The doctor gave the man a jar and said, 'Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow.'

The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared at the doctor's office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day .

The doctor asked what happened and the man explained, 'Well, doc, it's like this - first I tried with my right hand, but nothing.

Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing.

Then I asked my wife for help.

She tried with her right hand, then with her left, still nothing.

She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with her teeth out, still nothing.

We even called up Arleen, the lady next door and she tried too, first with both hands,
then an armpit, and she even tried squeezin' it between her knees, but still nothing.
The doctor was shocked! 'You asked your neighbor?!
The old man replied, ..........
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
'....Yep, and none of us could get the bloody jar open'.
 
I had that on a text yesterday :D

And before that, I had the same one come through in 1997 :D:D
 
Well now its in bloody stereo be greatful :D
 
Haha :lol: :lol: I like that!! :D


I just read a joke on tinternet aand though you lot would like it do you mind if i post here?
 
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Matt,

Just tried your anagram trick

"Anagram of my name = Tasty Male!!" :woot: :lol:

All I can get from Canon Bob is Bacon Nob :thinking:
 
I think i've heard that one before :lol: funny still though :thumbs:
 
A cabbie picks up a Nun. She gets into the cab, and notices that the VERY
handsome cab driver won't stop staring at her. She asks him why he is
staring. He replies: 'I have a question to ask you but I don't want to offend
you.’ She answers, 'My son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am and
have been a nun as long as I have, you get chance to see and hear just about
everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could say or ask that I would
find offensive. ‘Well, I've always had a fantasy to have sex with a nun.'

She responds, 'Well, let's see what we can do about that:

1, You have to be single
2, You must be Catholic.
3, I have to save my virginity, you will have to enter me from behind.'

The cab driver is very excited and says, 'Yes, I'm single, Catholic, and I happy to enter from behind!' 'OK' the nun says. 'Pull into the next alley.' The nun fulfils his fantasy, in a way that
would make a hooker blush. But when they get back on the road, the cab driver
starts crying. 'My dear child,' says the nun, 'why are you crying?' 'Forgive me
but I've sinned. I lied and I must confess, I’m married and I'm Jewish.’ The
nun says, 'That's OK. My name is Kevin and I’m going to fancy dress party.'
 
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