Chr***mas 2013 Bah Humbug Thread

Actually she took it as a queue to suggest i might like to experience some extracuricular activity with her... she had great difficulty in understanding that no means 'no, not under any circumstances, sorry its nothing personal'
 
That's kinda gross. At the very least it would make things more awkward.

Has anyone had a works xmas party yet? Had ours last night. Thankfully it was just a sit down meal rather than the "parties" we've had the last couple of times I've been. One appeared to be aimed at OAPs and the other was "80s night" where I recognised none of the "80s" hits.
 
Got roped in on buying a xmas tree today!!!! £45 !!!!!! and all for it to sit in my lounge and die!!!! Im sure it was more then happy facing its slow death in the garden centre!
 
Xmas cards covered in glitter :bang: now it's in the carpet so a nice all year round reminder.
 
4 words 'CHRISTMAS IS FOR KIDS' end off


What about birthdays? Easter? - You mean to tell me you dont receive a gift at Christmas from anyone? If you do then you have taken part - if you dont then I wonder why?;)
 
One of the biggest advantages of being a home carer for an elderly mother is that I will never have to attend embarrassing cringe worthy works Christmas parties. After all, back in my tomato farming days, I used to spend something like 300 days of the year dealing with the same tired old faces, all I couldn't stand so I wasn't at all sure I wanted to spend my spare time doing the same thing.
As for Christmas itself, I can't say that I'm getting that festive feeling as I look on it as unnecessary clutter. Anyway, since I'm happily single and have no children, I can get away with it all. :D
 
PS: By the way, the form horse is for a dry, mild and green Christmas Day over England and Wales. Northern Ireland and Scotland may be windy and unsettled with any snow being restricted to the Scottish mountains.
 
Classic line on JackFM yesterday: "Store owners - give your shoppers the christmas open market experience by turning all the heating off and tripling your prices." :lol:
 
What about birthdays? Easter? - You mean to tell me you dont receive a gift at Christmas from anyone? If you do then you have taken part - if you dont then I wonder why?;)

Yes is the answer to that question i do receive gifts as much as i give them. And as every year i always suggest to people about keeping there money and not to waste it on me but as yet it has never happened.

I'm very much a family man and enjoy getting together with them at Christmas to have a nice meal something to drink and watch the kids go loopy with excitement. Hence the reason for saying its for kids
 
Yes is the answer to that question i do receive gifts as much as i give them. And as every year i always suggest to people about keeping there money and not to waste it on me but as yet it has never happened.

I'm very much a family man and enjoy getting together with them at Christmas to have a nice meal something to drink and watch the kids go loopy with excitement. Hence the reason for saying its for kids


I tell people not to waste their money on me too haha - I enjoy giving more than I do receiving though! I get a bigger kick out seeing other peoples faces light up, especially my young son

:)


HAPPY CHRISTMAS TO EVERYONE IN THE THREAD!!

All Together.........We wish you a merry Christmas, we wish you a merry Christmas.........
 
HAPPY CHRISTMAS TO EVERYONE IN THE THREAD!!

All Together.........We wish you a merry Christmas, we wish you a merry Christmas.........

Oi! Sod off with that nonsense until at least the 24th! Bad enough every other song on the radio is Mariah Carey without you starting.

;)
 
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Christmas suks, as usual I'll be out and about with my camera come rain or shine...a flask of tea and a couple of mince-pies will suffice for lunch in the open air.
 
Watching the news makes me feel festive! Every day I get up and watch the morning news on a news channel called 24 Horas. The names of the 2 presenters are Jesús Amor y Ana Belén Roy. In English that's Jesus Love and Ana Bethlehem Roy. :lol:
 
Watching the news makes me feel festive! Every day I get up and watch the morning news on a news channel called 24 Horas. The names of the 2 presenters are Jesús Amor y Ana Belén Roy. In English that's Jesus Love and Ana Bethlehem Roy. :lol:
You certainly couldn't make that up
:lol: :lol: :lol:
 
Well Im not going to be around much after today so as its near enough I am going to wish fellow humgbugs and followers of this thread; not a happy holiday, or pleasant midwinter break, no, a full on, British very "merry" Christmas!

Cheers all!

 
Grinchoy the seasonal bleating and get some Christmas spirits inside you, one and all. Ho, ho, chuffing ho!
 
God if I have to put up with much more of this b******t,they call Xmas I think I will go :gag:,it's all the bloody add on the TV that are really getting to.
Most just a load of semimetal crap :eek:
 
This is just for you then :thumbs:

Father Christmas was not in a very good frame of mind - in fact he was very depressed.

That morning after breakfast, Mrs Santa had told him that her Mother was coming over to stay 'for a few days'
and he knew that would be for several weeks,
and as Christmas was approaching her visit was the last thing that he wanted.

The Elves had been playing up and had gone on strike for more pay.
The replacement elves Santa had put in were much slower and the number of toys that had been made was way down.

Father Christmas went to visit his Reindeer and found that two of them were pregnant,
and another two had kicked down the fence and had disappeared into the forest.
He was by now even more depressed.

What I need is a drink he thought, but upon going indoors he found that the elves had hidden his Whisky
and there was nothing left to drink in his liquor cabinet.
Deciding upon a coffee he went into the kitchen,
but managed to drop the Jar of Coffee all over the floor.
Now he really was cheesed off!

He went to fetch the broom to sweep up the mess but found that the mice had chewed off all the bristles.

At that moment there was a knock at the front door.

Upon opening it, Father Christmas was confronted by a beautiful Fairy holding a lovely Christmas Tree.

"Good Morning, Santa" she called "Isn't it a really lovely day.
I have bought you this beautiful tree, isn't it lovely?
Where would you like me to stick it?"

And that is why by tradition we have a Fairy sitting on top of our Christmas Trees.

Like it. Traditionally Christmas began with All Hallows Eve Oct 31 so let's keep it that way. Mention of the C word or products on the shelves in August... quite right, ridiculous.

Spare a thought for those for whom Christmas is another working day such as hospitals ( I once dated a nurse & worked as a hospital porter myself) or farmers where livestock needs attention 365 (or 366) days of the year
 
God if I have to put up with much more of this cowpaint,they call Xmas I think I will go :gag:,it's all the bloody add on the TV that are really getting to.
Most just a load of semimetal crap :eek:

That Semi metal is what they make Santa's sleigh skids from - extremely low coefficient of friction I am told:D


For your enjoyment:thumbs: If anyone would like to send a present :nikon:

 
By heck what a miserable lot some of you are!

I'm off to visit my family up north shortly and well looking forward to it.

Happy Christmas to you all
 
I am not religeous.. but I love christmas time.. I like the prezzies the food the parties the family get togethers.. dont care why.. I like the build up as well

If someone doesnt like christmmas thats there loss and they are welcome to that..... But what does bug me is there need to tlel everyone they dont like christmas.. like they are so proud of it.. look at me everyone.. i hate christmas.... bit sad....
 
Christmas suks, as usual I'll be out and about with my camera come rain or shine...a flask of tea and a couple of mince-pies will suffice for lunch in the open air.
Mince pies taste crap and should be banned.
 
Pretty sure nobody's saying that no one's allowed to enjoy commercialmas, just that we don't want it forced down our throats, especially when it starts in September! There are some aspects of the season I enjoy but stepping round the piles of last night's kebabs and drunken teens isn't one of them, neither is playing 'which drivers are pished'.
As the OP has said,
Well Im not going to be around much after today so as its near enough I am going to wish fellow humgbugs and followers of this thread; not a happy holiday, or pleasant midwinter break, no, a full on, British very "merry" Christmas!

Cheers all!

 
Mince pies taste crap and should be banned.

Personally, I'm unable to make the comparison having never tasted crap! I do like mince pies though, despite being a bah, humbugger. (I like xmas pud too and LOVE sprouts!)
 
Personally, I'm unable to make the comparison having never tasted crap! I do like mince pies though, despite being a bah, humbugger. (I like xmas pud too and LOVE sprouts!)
Many years ago, I used to drive tankers, one day, bottom loading "final effluent" (used as a fertiliser) the pipe burst,
I can assure you s***, (even refined s***) tastes like s***,
Give me a mince pie any day (y)
 
Ah well, all the crap will soon be over and back to normality.
 
I'm not sure they are ever "out" are they?
 
Oh g*d, here we go again, Cobra and out in the same sentence!!! :D:muted: :schtum:
 
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