Am I mad?

Simmotino

Simmotino

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Clarke Kent ;)
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Yes, you can be honest :D

One of my wife's work colleagues (who I also happen to have known for many years) is beginning to organise her wedding having just been asked by her fiance on holiday this year.

Having taken some pictures at parties and of other colleagues' newborn babies etc. that have done the rounds on their work email, she is aware of my photography abilities and has asked the wife to ask me to be the photographer for the wedding. She has already said how much she would pay (not bargain basement figure either) and has made her mind up she would be happy with me doing it.

I've said no.

I've had absolutely zero experience of photgraphing weddings, haven't used flash (seriously) before, no idea what the 'rules' are of wedding shooting, and really REALLY couldn't live with myself if I were to make a mess of the most important photographs of her life.

Am I nuts to turn down the job? She obviously likes my photography, and is happy to have me be the 'official' photographer (as is her husband to be) so she has no concerns. The fact we've known each other for ages means she'd be relaxed with me sticking a camera in her mush all day too (for the most part I expect). I just can't get over the fear of letting her down.

Am I right? Am I wrong? Am I plain mad? :cuckoo:

Opinions welcomed.
 
I'd say it was the right decision - there's a lot more to Wedding photography than being a decent photographer, and as you say... cocking it up will make you feel guilty everytime you see them

Take your camera along and shoot for the fun of it - you'll be more relaxed, under no pressure and may well then turn out some fab stuff anyway as an addition to the main tog

It's easy to say 'Yes' to such requests, and often the wrong decision IMO

:clap:

DD
 
i had a similar request last week and said yeah. i've not a load of experience with flash but i have two and a bit years to work out how to use it proplery and its a challenge that will be good for me

i have the other halfs dad who is willing to let me tag along with him before hand and has mentioned it a couple of times just to let me get used to it and what goes on etc.

its upto you how you feel towards doing the pics and how long it is until the wedding i guess to give you more time to look at it and prepare yourself to do it
 
I did my first official wedding last year, it was for a friend whom I had previously photographed events, and they knew I had never formally shot a wedding before. The only one I did previously was one where the photographer did not turn up so I took some shots.

I was reluctant to start with but they had only a few weeks to get everything organised - due to availability of relations and other committments so with trepidation I said yes. I bought a second camera body, got insured and took my lighting equipment over in case the weather was too bad to go outside. I did the formal shots they requested plus managed to get all the guests (by not letting them into the reception until I had their photographs :-) ) and got a lot of other reportage type shots. The B&G were delighted and ended up having a lot more pictures than they had initially planned with albums for various relatives. I will admit to having nightmares for a few nights beforehand.

If you definitely don't want to do it then you have made the right choice, if you are not sure whether you have made the right choice why not ask if you can be the second shooter to the official photographer if they are experienced. If you definitely feel you made the right choice then just take your camera for fun :)
 
I shot my first wedding blind, well not literally blind, but I had never done anything like it.

IMO, the shots came out better than I was expecting, and the bride and bride and families were over the moon with my shots :)

Heres a few of them... http://www.deegregory.com/?page_id=130&album=2&gallery=2

...just to show what a novice can do :)

Your call really, I would say go for it :)
 
Thanks for the replies all.

I have already offered to take my kit with me if they want me to (which obviously they do!) to capture the more reportage style of shot for them. As DD said, I'll be more comfortable doing that and will probably deliver them better photos (from me at least) as a result.

Not sure I'd want to shadow/back up the official photographer to be honest as I'm sure they'd rather he concentrated on doing what he was being paid for rather than asking why I was shooting an ashtray! :D

I was (and still am) comfortable with the decision, but the wife says I'm mad to turn down money for doing something I love, so thought I'd canvass unbiased opinion here.

Nice shots Betty (posted whilst I was typing)
 
If you dont feel it's right, then you've made the right decision.

After all, we could sit here and say WHAT!?!...are you MAD? Good price for the shots, B&G you know and are comfortable with, no seriously high expectations etc etc. But, at the end of the day, we're not the ones who have to stand at the church with knocking knee's and take photos on the happiest day of someones life. :thumbs:
 
Little Man said:
...we could sit here and say WHAT!?!...are you MAD? Good price for the shots, B&G you know and are comfortable with, no seriously high expectations etc etc...
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Which is why the wife thinks I'm bonkers to say no :nono:

Little Man said:
...we're not the ones who have to stand at the church with knocking knee's and take photos on the happiest day of someones life. :thumbs:
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Which is why I don't care what the wife thinks! :D

(Unless she's reading this over my shoulder, in which case of course you are right darling!)
 
Wow, what a decision to have to make. I'd say straight off that you would be mad to do it if you don't feel right about it. I know I was over the moon with my wedding tog, and I also know I've seen 'proper' togs work from mates weddings and have been shocked by the poor quality. So maybe you could have the best of both worlds and point them in the direction of a tog you know to be excellent (probably someone from TP) and you could act as their assistant? That way you'd make sure that you got the shots that you know they'd like but with an experienced tog to do the rest? Only a thought.
 
Thanks Pippy. Wasn't a difficult decision to be honest as I really couldn't face the thought of ruining the photos. It's not like shooting a log where you can go back and try again is it?! The more others keep telling me I wouldn't ruin them though the more I doubt I should worry about it quite so much and accept a sizeable paycheque!

I think I'm happiest with the official photographer doing his day job, and me getting all "arty farty" as the wife calls it to my own agenda through the day though. I'd like some sleep between now and the big day!

Some interesting viewpoints being aired here though all the same, all of which are appreciated.
 
taking wedding photos is the same as taking any other photo. you have to be organised and shoot quickly. If you are decent behind the lens you'll have no problem shooting a wedding
 
Simmotino said:
Not sure I'd want to shadow/back up the official photographer to be honest as I'm sure they'd rather he concentrated on doing what he was being paid for rather than asking why I was shooting an ashtray! :D
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the way i would see it would be he just let you do what you do normally and take the pics. then during a break or afterwards you get tips and compare the pics etc, or put them on a CD for there comments/critique
 
POAH said:
taking wedding photos is the same as taking any other photo. you have to be organised and shoot quickly. If you are decent behind the lens you'll have no problem shooting a wedding
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Soz - but that's simply not true

Being a Wedding tog isn't just about taking photos - it's far more involved than that on a whole range of levels, and as soon as you're being paid for it too you've massively changed the scenario from just being a m8 with a camera doing it

The main one though is that you really have to be a 'people person' and be good at commanding them (gently, but firmly) and lots of people just don't like doing this or aren't much cop at it either

There is NEVER enough time to shoot as you'd like or imagine, so time pressure is ever constant too

I don't mean to put anyone, OP inc., off getting into Weddings, but being able to take a decent pic is only one small part of it

Whatever amount of dosh is being offered isn't enough to cover the need for back-ups to everything & insurance as a Wedding tog; if this was a definite move into Weddings as a Pro then that's a different matter

He's made his decision, now let him go enjoy their Wedding rather than fussing about it beforehand and being stressed on the day

All IMHO of course :)

DD
 
I think you've definately made the right decision, as DD says there is more to Wedding Togging than taking a picture, you have the responsibility of capturing the most important day in two peoples lives. IMO before even considering taking photos at a wedding as the main tog you need to be sure that you can handle things going wrong (e.g. weather, equipment failure etc) and as part of that having a backup for everything is critical.

Well done with being brave and saying no :clap:
 
POAH said:
taking wedding photos is the same as taking any other photo. you have to be organised and shoot quickly. If you are decent behind the lens you'll have no problem shooting a wedding
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You really do come across as an arrogant sod you know, i've seen your photos and have a decent amount of respect for you because you seem to know exactly what you're doing, but some of the comments you come out with makes baby jesus cry.
 
Now now chaps, let's not have an arguement eh? :nono:

Was just canvassing opinions and POAH is just as entitled to his as everyone else.
 
Oh yeah, definatly mate, wasn't disputing that.
 
DiddyDave said:
Soz - but that's simply not true

Being a Wedding tog isn't just about taking photos - it's far more involved than that on a whole range of levels, and as soon as you're being paid for it too you've massively changed the scenario from just being a m8 with a camera doing it

The main one though is that you really have to be a 'people person' and be good at commanding them (gently, but firmly) and lots of people just don't like doing this or aren't much cop at it either

There is NEVER enough time to shoot as you'd like or imagine, so time pressure is ever constant too

I don't mean to put anyone, OP inc., off getting into Weddings, but being able to take a decent pic is only one small part of it

Whatever amount of dosh is being offered isn't enough to cover the need for back-ups to everything & insurance as a Wedding tog; if this was a definite move into Weddings as a Pro then that's a different matter

He's made his decision, now let him go enjoy their Wedding rather than fussing about it beforehand and being stressed on the day

All IMHO of course :)

DD
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:agree:

Even if my standard does ever get to that where I get asked, I don't think I'd ever do weddings. I'd crack under the pressure.

On a slightly different vien but still the same, I do Disco's, I love it and its no problem but when I get asked to do ones for friends, I stress out majorly. Not becuase its more difficult, but because I want to make sure that its perfect for them and they enjoy themselves. Its similar for togging for a friend I would imagine.
 
Rob.7wood said:
:agree:

Even if my standard does ever get to that where I get asked, I don't think I'd ever do weddings. I'd crack under the pressure.

On a slightly different vien but still the same, I do Disco's, I love it and its no problem but when I get asked to do ones for friends, I stress out majorly. Not becuase its more difficult, but because I want to make sure that its perfect for them and they enjoy themselves. Its similar for togging for a friend I would imagine.
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I think that is where I would buckle to. It becomes a more personal quest to try and provide the best, rather than a business proposition, and the added pressure could easily distract you from delivering what you know you could provide.

For me.... I think you made the perfect decision. Cover the wedding as a sideline tog and build your confidence and hone your technique before maybe one day making the step up, when you are ready.
 
Going back to the good old days of film....I've done a 2 weddings and the fear of screwing up are always present. People usually ask because they want to save money and know you got a exspensive camera. I think when your younger you know less fear and like to try knew things. The first one was by far the worst...the photo's were great but I was also the best man...never doing that again:eek:

I've been to lots of weddings since and enjoy them more when you can get the sort of shots where people and friends are more relaxed later on, and there's no pressure on you to get all the main shots people exspect to see in a album. I'm sure they will be pleased if you get half a dozen good shots noboby else got on the day....well done for turning it down..wish I did:lol:
 
Simmotino said:
I was (and still am) comfortable with the decision, but the wife says I'm mad to turn down money for doing something I love, so thought I'd canvass unbiased opinion here.
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Doing something you love for money is the quickest way to stop loving it.

You went with your gut feeling and I think you made the right decision for you :thumbs:
 
Thing is, even if you regret it when it comes to the day, going to the wedding with the eye of "Well, if I was the official tog I'd do this ..." is really great training as well.

It's not like this will be the only chance you ever get to take somebody's wedding photos!
 
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