Alberts Amazing Adventures

[kallope]

This is a 365 project where Albert is the subject of 365 photos and he will be undertaking 365 adventures

Become a fan of Albert on Facebook or follow his blog or on flickr

1-365 Alberts Adventures at new years

This is the amazing adventures of Albert and the start of his 365 adventure. On the eve of new year, Albert decided to throw a party. The party went off with a bang, and all his friends enjoyed them selves. The next day Albert felt a little light headed and starry eyed. But what will his adventures hold for him next......


2-365 Alberts Adventures in the Jungle

After getting his head back on, Albert decided he needed to get some fresh air.

After watching the topgear special at Christmas, he decided to visit the rain forest for the day.

While there he successfully managed to navergate through the dense undergrowth and came out the other side in one peice.

While on the flight home Albert wondered what the next 363 days had in store for him...........


3-365 Alberts Adventures accross the Siberian Wasteland

Day 3 of Albert's 365 adventure and the thrill of adrenaline cruising through his cardboard vein's is starting to become addictive.

In his youth, Albert used to be an avid biker, So today he decided to get back on the old beast and take on the Siberian Wasteland.

After falling off a number of times, Albert conquered the beast and raced across the wasteland to his next adventure. Where will this road trip lead to?


4-365 Alberts Adventures accross the Sahara Desert

Sadly today's adventure did not end in such a good way with Alberts biking road trip.

While finding it difficult to drive across the Sahara, Albert came to an abrupt halt when his bike flipped and sent him tumbling down the sand dune. When he reached the bottom he was met with another terrible surprise.

The bike that has sumasulted off the top of the sand dune, was now heading right for him. Sadly Albert was not quick enough and the bike crashed into him.

Hopefully Albert will be able to put himself together ready for tomorrows adventure.


5-365 Alberts Adventures with his super snowboard

After his terrible day yesterday, Albert decided to leave his bike at home. But with all the snow about, Albert couldn't just stay at home, he had to get out.

So he rummaged around in the loft till he found his extream snowboard that he used to win the world championships 10 years ago.

Once he got onto the slopes, it all came flooding back to him, and the adrenalin was racing through his cardboard veins as he weaved in and out of the trees.

After a fantastic day, Albert warmed up with a hot mug of chocolate and daydreamed about what he would get up to tomorrow.


6-365 Alberts Adventures with the snow

After his exhausting day out yesterday, Albert decided to have a more laid back day.

So he donned a hat and scarf and went for a leisurely stroll through the park.

As the snow was so deep, Albert decided it was time to make a snow man. So he gave it his scarf and hat, then found some stones and a carrot for the finishing touches.

After another day in the snow, Albert returned home hoping it will last a few more days.

 

[kallope]

7-365 Alberts Adventures with the family portrait

Seven days into the new year, and Alberts family want their annual family portrait taken.

Its a very formal affair with all the ladies dressing to impress. Albert on the other hand takes a slightly different approach and wears his everyday clothes as he does not own any formal boxes to wear.

Now the portrait has been taken, Albert can get back to his adventures and cannot wait to see where he will end up tomorrow.


8-365 Alberts Adventures on his Night Walk

After a few laid-back days making snowmen and having family portrait's done, Albert wanted to go on a walk in the wilderness to see what adventures had in store for him.

While on his walk, he traveled through dense forests where he had to defend himself from wolf and bear attacks. After all this Albert became disorientated and could not find his way home.

Even with frostbite beginning to set in, Albert kept his cool and kept on going as he was not going to let the snow defeat him. Luckily for Albert, a search and rescue helicopter spotted him with their spot light and brought him back to civilization where he could recover.

While recovering Albert started planning his next trip out.


9-365 Alberts Adventures with the common cold

Day 9 of Albert's 365 adventure and due to his time in the cold weather, Albert was lucky enough to only be suffering from a cold.

But being a man, this cold is 100 times worse than any cold you have ever experienced in your life and Albert is feeling really sorry for himself and has decided to spend the day in bed to recover. Unfortunately for Albert, he does not have enough money for a proper bed and has to suffice with an empty box of matches.

Hopefully Albert is feeling better tomorrow and can go on another crazy adventure.


10-365 Alberts Adventures with Lemsip

After feeling so sorry for himself yesterday, Albert decided to venture out to get some medicine for him self.

When he got to the supermarket, he was confronted with all different shapes and sizes of medicine and he didn't know which one to choose.

Eventually he made his way to the lemsip shelf where he pulled the first box he came to. In a flash there was an avalanche of cold and flue pills tumbling towards him which knocked him off the shelf and onto the floor, 5ft below.

Albert learnt the hard way that you should never take boxes from the bottom of a pile, as it only leads to trouble


11-365 Alberts Adventures with his PS3

Today Albert got to grips with the PS3.

Albert got the PS3 for christmas, and it has taken him till now to finaly set it up. But there is no time like the present to get some mad fifa action on the go.

At first he found it very difficult to play as he couldn't reach all the buttons. So he found some lolly-pop sticks and used them to extend his reach to great effect.

Although he could now reach the buttons, it didn't help very much as Alberts hand eye co-ordination in his old age is not very good and he could not win a single game.

Hopefully Albert will be able to get some fresh air in his next adventure


12-365 Alberts Adventures climbing Everest

Today Albert went hiking.

At his heart Albert is a avid walker. He loves to get in the fresh air and feel the earth beneath his feet.

So with this in-mind, Albert decided to take on Mount Everest. He knew it would be no easy challenge so packed a sack with supply's for his journey.

On the way, Albert conquered crevasse, avalanches and vertical ice walls. But Albert beat the odds and made it to the summat.

Now how is he going to get down from there............

 

[kallope]

13-365 Alberts Adventures free falling

After Albert's tiring climb to the top. He camped there for the day to try and gain his energy back. But due to the high altitude, he could not get his breath back.

Panic began to set in, as Albert could not think how he was going to get down. He considered sending off a flair to get a rescue team to get him. But the remembered his at the highest point in the world and they will not be able to save him.

His rational mind abandoned him and he decided to free dive to get down the mountain quickly. 1....2.......3..........HERE HE GOESSSSSSSssssss

While he was falling through the air, he could feel it getting thicker, rational thoughts began to flood back into his head......"How am I going to stop falling?" This was a major problem, how was he going to slow down.

As fate should have it, Albert free fall gradually became shallower until he was skidding down the side of the mountain till he reached the base. Wow that was a trip he didn't want to repeat. Then Albert remembered he had left his sack at the summit. Let's hope the next people up there can bring it down for him.


14-365 Alberts Adventures saving the snow

Today Albert's rebellious side came out. With the snow around, all he has heard is people moaning about the snow. So today Albert decided to do something about it.

Albert gathered a group of his friends and went on a protesting march to promote the love of snow. He is a proud speaker and will never shy away when things he care's dearly about are being put down.

Albert marched all day long. Which sadly produced the opposite effect to what he wished to achieve. The precious snow he was trying to save had now melted away, and this was due to Albert's constant marching. Hopefully he will be more successful on his next adventure.


15-365 Alberts Adventureswith his Birthday

Day 15 and Albert is celebrating his birthday!

It's that glorious time of year again where Albert gets to celebrate getting older. Albert loves his birthdays, making the most of it by seeing all his family and going out in the evening. Tonight his off to subway city for a night not to forget

Amongst the pile of presents was a stylish green Ben Sherman top that fitting him amazingly. Albert was so delighted by it as he has never owned any clothes before, so he may not take it off. Other gifts included a box repair kit, parachute and other adventure equipment that you never know when Albert's going to need.

Lets hope he wakes up with a clear head tomorrow.


16-365 Alberts Adventures with the recovery

The morning after the big birthday celebrations, Albert needs a breakfast fit for the gods to make him feel better.

So he went rummaging in the fridge and to his horror, has no bacon, sausage, or black pudding. How is he supposed to recover without the full English fry.

Then he had an idea (even though he had a splitting head ache). What do the french eat to recover.....CROISSANTS!!

So he filled a big plate of them and spent the day feeling much better.


17-365 Alberts Adventures running away from till rolls

Today Albert took his adventures back to the supermarket.

Unlike normal people, due to Albert's height handicap, small meaningless objects become massive obstacles to him. So when he went to his local supermarket for his weekly shop, he did not expect to have to run for his life away from out of control till rolls.

It all happened when Albert reached the checkout to pay for his shopping. The checkout assistant went to change his till roll, when he dropped them and sent them tumbling towards Albert at great speed. Albert ducked and dived to avoid them, but sadly could not avoid the inevitable and a rogue till roll took him out from behind.

Nursing a sour back, Albert paid for his shopping and left the store defeated.


18-365 Alberts Adventures at the GYM

Today Albert decided to join the gym.

With the summer coming fast, Albert thought he better get working out so that he would look good for his sunny beach holiday.

When he got there he joined a few classes and couldn't believe how much its going to cost.

As he walked into the changing room, he had a chuckle to himself about a sign "You cannot put a price on perfection" Albert thought, why are you charging me to come here then?

 

[kallope]

19-365 Alberts Adventures with practical jokes

What lurks in the shadows?

Today Albert has been in a mischievous mood. Playing practical jokes on passersby to great affect with them running off screaming.

It all started this morning when he put bird seed in his friends breakfast bowl and claimed it was Muesli, which they believed and eat the whole bowl. Other practical jokes included super gluing a £2 coin to the floor at a bus stop so people would try picking it up.

By the evening Albert had taken to hiding in the shadows and jumping out to scare people walking by. Albert has had so much fun today, he might have to try it more often.


20-365 Alberts Adventures with his reflection

Today Albert went for a walk in the garden.

He had heard on the weather forecast that snow was expected again, and he couldn't wait!

When he went outside though, he was met with a different scene to what he expected. It was raining and there was no snow insight.

Albert walked around the garden before become entranced by his reflection in a puddle. Lets hope the snow comes soon.


21-365 Alberts Adventures playing football

Today Albert had a kick about in the garden with the family.

Unknown to Albert, the family decided to visit today. And with nothing prepared for this unexpected arrival, people became very restless and board.

So Albert suggested a game of football in the garden. Albert is a very skillful player with a first touch to die for.

When Albert was going for a lose ball, one of the family decided to dive in with a tackle. Luckily Albert managed to flick the ball on first, and jump over the reckless tackle before going on to score the winning goal


22-365 Alberts Adventures fighting the hoover

Day 22 and Albert took on more than he could handle.

After the family had left, Albert had a lot of tidying up to do. There were crisps trodden into the carpet, blackcurrant stains in the work top and makeup on the mirrors. Even though Albert is not that tidy himself, this was more than he felt comfortable with so put on his mini marigolds and got started.

While hovering the carpet, the hover stopper working. So Albert gave it a bit of a kick......still nothing. So he kicked it a bit harder and........still noting. So Albert gave it the biggest kick he could and.........the hover came to life and went straight for him. Within seconds Albert was stuck and was going nowhere.

The hover swung Albert around until he went too far and his plug came out the wall. Suddenly there was no suction left to hold Albert on and he was sent flying into a vase of flowers. Never again will Albert do the hovering again, it's just too dangerous.


23-365 Alberts Adventure In The Great Kitchen Cup Race

The Great Kitchen Cup Race

Today Albert invited some friends round for one of the greatest underground race compertitions... the great kitchen cup race!

If people think Lemans is tough, they have seen nothing yet. Albert has been looking forwad to this race all year, tuning his volkswagen camper van to be as fast as possible.

Albert didnt get off to the greatest starts, but as the race progressed, he worked his way to pole position and on to win the mighty kitchen cup!

It was a proud day for him and he hopes to repeat it next year


24-365 Alberts Adventures becoming a Tank Commander

Today Albert became a tank commander

It has taken a number of years but Albert has finally been promoted to his regimental tank commander. Albert has been looking for this promotion for a number of years and has seen his fair share of combat in the great war of the mole and also in the defence of the hill top from sparrows.

But his worst experience was routine patrol of the pond. When out of nowhere he came under attack from a giant toad. This monster weighed about 1kg and was the size of his tank. Albert opened fire but the pellets just bounced off the toads rubbery skin.

While under fire, the toad jumped into the pond and sent a tidal wave straight Albert's way. It was so huge that it flipped the tank over leaving Albert stuck inside. Albert thought he was dun for, when Albert had an idea, if he could raise the turret, he might be able to crawl out from underneath. This worked perfectly, and Albert was able to go get help to flip his tank back round.

 

[kallope]

25-365 Alberts Adventures learning how to dance

Albert becomes a dancing queen.

Today Albert decided that he has always wanted to dance. But he couldn't decided what sort of dancing to go for. He felt he wasn't old enough to learn ball room dancing because he would not feel right in a suit and he would always worry about treading on his partners toes. And he couldn't imagine himself becoming club dancer because he hates face paint, and all those hot sweaty people around would ruin his card board boxes.

So Albert decided to learn how to break dance. His a very flexible character, so he knew that he would be able to pull off the moves very easily. His only problem was his lack of rhythm, but Albert thought this would just come naturally. So he began some lessons and could pull of the moves like an expert. But linking the moves together and with the music became a major problem as his sense of rhythm never appeared. In the end Albert had to give up and put it down as a bad hobby choice.


26-365 Alberts Adventures shopping on the internet

The problems of buying online.

Recently Albert has been saving money for a new zoom lens for his camera. His not the brightest when it comes to using computers. But despite this, Albert was determined to get this lens off the internet so save money.

So after a while of surfing the web, he found the perfect one and bought it in a flash. When the parcel arrived today, to Albert's surprise, the box was a lot bigger than he had anticipated. It measured a massive 30 cm long and 20cm high.

Albert presumed the seller was just being careful and filling it with packaging so it did not get broken. But to Albert's joy when he opened the box there it was, the lens he wanted, however there was a slight snag. This lens was 100times bigger than Albert's camera and the picture on the internet that Albert had seen. Suddenly Albert realised that he had made a massive mistake, and that the picture size on the internet is not the actual size of the product. How will Albert sort this mess out now...

 

[kallope]

27-365 Alberts Adventures Swimming with the Fishes

Today Albert got his feet wet.

After the disastrous shopping experience yesterday, Albert needed to get out the house. So he popped onto the train and went to the beach for his next adventure.

While on the train he was reading the Danbo Times and came across and advert for adventures under the sea. This got him thinking and as soon as the train arrived at the station, he was off to the local diving school to find a boat to get out there.

Once out on the ocean, he raced to the best diving spot around, and jumped straight in. But he discover that the water made his boxes all soggy, and he just floated. Albert was not going to come this far and not be able to go swimming. So he rubbed wax all over himself to make himself waterproof and then put several stones in his legs to help him sink.

This worked perfectly, he sank straight to the bottom on the sea, Albert was at one with the fish! But then he carried on sinking and ended up stuck in the sea weed at the bottom of the ocean due to the weight of the stones in his legs. Albert was trapped, how was he going to get out? Then the wax he rubbed on earlier came into play again. Due to its slippy nature, it helped Albert squeeze out of the weeds and remove the stones, so he could escape to the boat again. What an adventure!

 

[kallope]

Today Albert became a first aider.

After his many accidents that have happened while pursuing the thrill of the adventure, Albert decided it was time to learn some first Aid so that he could fix himself or others if required.

So he went along to the course and learnt very quickly that first aid is not as easy as he first perceived. First off Albert expected to be able to fix everything with just a plaster, and then he discover that he has to be able to make a sling for people to use. This seemed very odd to Albert as his parts just popped in and out of his body and he could not see the use for a sling.

But Albert persisted and learnt how to give people CPR without them sucking him into their mouth due to his size. At the end of the day, Albert was awarded his first Aid badge and can save people's lives including his own.

He was also delighted to hear that his adventure yesterday is getting printed in the local paper!

 

[kallope]

29-365 Alberts Adventures as a magician

Albert uses the magic of illusion to trick his friends.

Today Albert had been hosting a kids party for his nephew where he performed magic tricks to keep them amused. To begin with he started off with the old favourite of pulling a rabbit out of the hat, followed up by pulling coloured hankies out of his month.

Sadly these magic tricks did not keep them amused long and they preferred the clown who was making them blow up animals out of balloons. How was Albert going to compete with a balloon making clown?

As the party carried on at full force into the evening, Albert looked up at the sky looking for help and inspiration in how he was going to win the crowd back over. Then he saw the big full moon and came up with an idea. He set the stage up ready for the big finale "the man who juggled the moon".

The crowed were wowed and amazed at this magic and there were cheers from all. The kids could be heard telling their parents on the way home about the magic they had just witnessed. Albert turned with a big smile on his face pleased with the job he had done.

 

[Gonetae]

Michael these are brill and I really enjoyed reading through them all, looking forward to his further adventures and really want to get one of those wee guys myself, he's sooo damn cute.

Tommy.

 

[mtracerz]

Will admit I didnt read through the paragraphs, however some really cracking and very amusing shots.
Must say these lil guys can create some great shots (albeit with a creative mind setting them up)
Will be checking back for your next installments

 

[snoop69]

Brilliant idea.

You should make a photobook per month out of these

 

[kallope]

30-365 Alberts Adventures giving blood

Today Albert did something amazing, he gave blood

Earlier in the week Albert had seen the give blood advert and decided that he wanted to give blood. So he gave them a ring to find out where his local donation was talking place and booked his slot so that he didn't have to wait around.

The big day came and his nerves were rising as he had never given blood before and he didn't know if it was going to hurt. His friends has told him of the giant needles they use to get the blood out, and it might kill him. But when he arrived the nurses reassured him that everything was alright and everything was going to fine, that is till they saw the colour of his blood.

Albert sat down and suck his arm out, do to his size the nurse struggled to find a pulse, but after a while she could just about feel it. As she stuck the needle in Albert gave off a little yelp and twitched. However the nurse gave off a louder scream when she saw Albert's blood coming out black.

Albert didn't realise that they only wanted normal blood and that his special blood was no use to them.



31-365 Alberts Adventure playing darts

As January comes to a close, Albert reflects over the adventures his had this month and feels a sense of excitement as to what else is coming his way. However sadly since he gave blood yesterday, he has been advised to not do too many strenuous activities.

This ment that Albert could not go mountain biking up a mountain like he had previously wanted to do today. Instead he still wanted to get some fresh air, and play one of his favourite pass times, darts.

In his youth Albert was amongst other things, a pro darts player. He was renowned around the world and many a young darts player came to him to coach them in a manner like the karate kid. He used to tell his students to go out into the wild and hone their skills, because when they do this, it is just them and the dart and there are no distractions, they can feel the dart, they think like the dart, THEY ARE THE DART.

This is why Albert decided to go into the wild to let his boxes down and have a relaxing game of darts where the pressure just oozed away. Unfortunately the media caught wind of this miraculous return of the dart messiah to the holly board and his peaceful day was ruined.

 

[GaryS70]

This is a great project - excellent photos, and I love the story behind them - great stuff.

Really like day 21 - superb.

Looking forward to seeing more.

 

[kallope]

32-365 Alberts Adventures in the park

The beginning of February is a sad time for Albert.

This time last year Albert met Sally, who would go on to be the love of his life. Albert was running through the park when he came under attack from the swan. They chased him around the pond and were gaining on him inch by inch. Albert thought he was going to be bird food when out of nowhere, little gravel stones were been thrown his way.

Albert couldn't believe it, he was going to be eaten by a swan and someone thought it funny to throw stones at him. But then it became clear, this person was actually throwing stones at the swans to stop them chasing Albert. It worked and when Albert looked up there was Sally, standing over him with the golden sunlight shining behind her like an angel.

Sadly things did not last between Albert and Sally, as she wanted to go off and find adventures. She wanted Albert to come with her to see the world and all its wonders, but Albert didn't want to leave the place he grew up in, so she left without him.

It was this key moment in Albert's life that he decided he had to get out there and have adventures of his own. But today he visited the park he and sally used to walk together, for the first time since their split. All the memories came flooding back, and even though it's still winter, the sun was setting the same way it used to. Albert looked up into the sky and with a tear to his eye wondered where sally was now, and wondered if he would ever meet her again?

 

[kirk09]

Great Update

Kirk

 

[kallope]

33-365 Alberts Adventure in the paper

Today Albert became a star!

With his adventures beginning to spread around, the local newspaper decided to do an article on Albert's amazing adventures, and in particular his adventures deep sea diving. The reason they chose his deep sea diving adventure was because this was a new world record for the longest deep sea dive with only one breath.

Albert was delighted to see his picture in the paper and couldn't believe that he was a new record holder and wanted to tell all his friends. However his friends had already seen the paper article and had already gathered outside Albert's house. As well as Albert's friends lots of people from the local area had started joined in with the celebration and were banging on the door wanting to see Albert.

Albert couldn't believe it, he was a local celebrity now and everyone wanted to know him. People were asking for his autograph and wanted their pictures with him. Albert was happy to oblige and kept his adoring fans extremely happy. By the end of the day Albert was exhausted and covered in lipstick, Albert thought "this was harder than holding my breath on that dive"

 

[kallope]

34-365 Alberts Adventures crossing the road

Day 34 and Albert gets up in hospital.

After his thrilling day yesterday becoming a star, Albert was on top of the world, he felt invincible. Everything was going his way, he had never felt so alive, so today be felt that he deserved to treat himself to a new plasma TV.

On his way to the shops, he heard the ice cream van tune coming from down a road. Albert hadn't had an ice cream for years, so decided as everything was going so well for him, that he would have one. Without thinking, Albert began to run across the road.....BANG

Albert had not checked to see if any traffic was coming and as a result was tossed 12inches into the air! The car came skidding to a halt and the driver couldn't believe it, there was no damage to his car, this was because Albert was made out of boxes. Sadly the opposite could be said for Albert, and he came quickly down from his high of being famous to the agony of his broken boxes, no ice cream could of numbed the pain he was going through now.

Albert was quickly rushed to the local hospital where he was glued back together. Albert learnt the hard way that you should always look both ways when crossing the road as next time he might not be so lucky.

 

[kallope]

35-365 Alberts Adventures playing Jenga

JENGAAAAAA

After Albert's accident yesterday, he felt the need for a quieter day in today. So he invited his friend round to have a nice relaxing game of jenga.

As you can imagine, this game is quite difficult for someone of Albert's size, as once his taken a block out he has to then climb the block tower to place his piece on top. This can be very risky, as Albert has witnessed many of his friends toppling the tower while climbing it. Luckily for Albert, this has never happened to him as his an expert rock climber and can easily scale vertical rock faces.

However today Albert was a little stiff from his accident yesterday and playing the game was going to be a little difficult. He was first to go, and as he was pulling on the jenga piece he felt a twinge in his back. As he felt this, he lent on the jenga piece and sent the stack tumbling towards him! Albert was too slow to react and was buried under the jenga rubble.

Never has Albert or his friend seen a game ended so quickly!

 

[kallope]

36-365 Alberts Adventure playing the eggman

I am the eggman....

Today Albert was sitting in an English garden waiting for the sun, thinking what had he done so wrong to have so many accidents in the last couple of days, and how could he avoid any more trauma.

As these thoughts were bouncing around in his mind, a friend rang and asked if Albert wanted to take part in a gig tonight as one of the stage props. Albert couldn't see anything wrong in this so agreed to do it.

When he got to the gig, he was handed an egg suit to wear as his friends band was a Beatle tribute band and they wanted him to act as one of the eggmen in the famous song, "I am the walrus" by the Beatles. Albert was delighted to get this role, as this was his favourite song.

Sadly his joy was short lived as when he got onto the stage, he tripped and smashed his shell. Albert was devastated as he could not go on stage and perform anymore.

 

[kallope]

37-365 Alberts Adventures at the farm

After ruining his friends show the previous day, Albert felt the need to make it up to him by helping out on his farm.

Albert does not spend much time at the farm, because his quite scared of the animals and is not a huge fan of the smells that are there either. But as it was a favour, he couldn't refuse to help and had to go.

When he got there, his friend was nowhere to be seen, so Albert had a wonder round to look for him. He eventually found him in a field scratching his head, so Albert wondered over to see what was the matter. When he got there he found a cow that had got his head stuck in a fence and couldn't get it back out again.

Albert suggested that he pulled on the cow and his friend pushed, to help get it out. As they did this, the cow jerked backwards and became free. This happened so quickly the Albert slipped in the mud and landed in a cow pat. Albert was not amused as he still had the rest of the day to carry on working before he could get clean again.

 

[AndyWest]

He's been a very busy little fella!!! SUPERB series!!

 

[kallope]

38-365 Alberts Adventures riding a tortoise

Day 38 and Albert goes for a ride.

Albert has always been one for experiences and unusual activities. And knowing this, his friends got him a red letter day voucher for his birthday. As it was Sunday and the day of rest, Albert decided to use his voucher up on a relaxing adventure.

Some might consider using it for race car driving or a day in the spa, but Albert is not an ordinary person and wanted to use it on riding lessons. However these riding lessons were a little different to what people expect, as there are no horses involved. Instead Albert had booked tortoise riding lessons for today, as he thought they didn't travel very fast and he couldn't get too hurt.

For the first lesson, Albert was told to gain the tortoises trust by feeding it some lettuce, but strangely the tortoise seemed more interested in trying to bite Albert's arm off, so Albert opted to feed it an apple. This seemed to work, and the tortoise began on the apple. but as it bite into the apple, it slipped out his mouth and was sent rolling across the floor at the unaware Albert where it hit him straight in the face.

This little accident didn't deter Albert and eventually he managed to mount the tortoise and enjoy the rest of his day.

 

[mickyluv]

Michael, it is very clear that you are in fact mad. I love it, as does my wife,don't give up on this 365 or you will be in serious trouble...Mick

 

[PerfectSpeed]

Michael, it is very clear that you are in fact mad.

Didn't read the paragraphs but love the series

 

[kallope]

39-365 Alberts Adventures at work

Today Albert returned to work.

In the current economic climate, it is surprising to discover that Albert actually has a job. Even more surprising is that he runs his own company and has 19 people on his work force. Today Albert decided to pop into work to check that everything was running smoothly.

When Albert walked into the office, everyone was pleased to see him, and asked how his adventures had been so far. Albert replied "you should of been keeping up to date on my facebook fans page" then stormed into his office.

Once inside he was greeted with a mountain of paper work that was taller than he was, so he began to jump at the top of the pile so that he could see what work had piled up for him to do. As Albert was attempting this, the desk fan turned round to face him and blew all his paper work off the table and across the floor, Albert also was blown off the table and into the bin.

Albert had to use bluetack to help scale the bin to safety.

 

[kallope]

40-365 Alberts Adventures in the Jellybean Machine

Albert celebrates appearing in the Birmingham Mail for the second week running!

Today Albert picked up his local paper and decided to see what the other photographers in the area had been up to. When he got to the page he was overjoyed to be greeted with another picture of himself. He couldn't quite believe it! Once was a great achievement, but twice in consecutive weeks was outstanding.

To celebrate Albert bought a giant jelly bean machine as he felt back on top of the world. When he got it home, he discovered he didn't have any more money to use to get any of the jelly beans out. This was torture for him, as jelly beans are his favourite food and being so close to them without being able to eat them was driving him mad.

So Albert being the nimble gymnast decided to climb inside the machine and try to get some out. It was a tight squeeze to get inside and Albert could just about reach the jellybeans when suddenly he got a shooting pain in his arm. Cramp had began to set in, and Albert could not move to stop it, he was stuck and this searing pain was making it even worse. He yelled for help, but no one could hear him inside the jellybean machine. So he began rocking side to side, until the machine fell on its side.

This didn't help as Albert was expecting it to break, then to Albert's disbelief, it began rolling to the edge of the table. He couldn't believe it, twice in two days he was going to fall off a table. He closed his eyes and waited for the inevitable, but it never came. Luckily for Albert the jellybean machine had got stuck on some sellotape, and he was able to escape.

 

[PerfectSpeed]

OK Michael, you have way too much time on your hands.

Unsubscribing due too much writing, this is a photography forum, not a strange blog forum

Great pic's though.

CYA

Steve

 

[kallope]

OK Michael, you have way too much time on your hands.

Unsubscribing due too much writing, this is a photography forum, not a strange blog forum

Great pic's though.

CYA

Steve

sorry to hear that, but the stories are to go with the pics to add more life to the character, and to make u chuckle at the madness of it all

 

[mithrandir]

Subscribed.


The pics are hilarious.

 

[scraggs]

You will never please everyone, it's hard enough doing a 365 but to do one and then write a story at the same time is quite a feet.
It's great I like it and my hat goes off to you for doing it.

 

[Rudders]

Love this series, I'm now looking for a little friend to put into different scenario's... I think that's going to be my shortfall, I could never think of the stories.

I also think the photo's are well taken too in their own right.

 

[Trev4]

You will never please everyone, it's hard enough doing a 365 but to do one and then write a story at the same time is quite a feet.
It's great I like it and my hat goes off to you for doing it.

 

[kallope]

41-365 Alberts Adventures to Tibet

Day 41 and Albert is back on his adventures.

Today Albert travelled to the Tibetan mountains of Mount Kailash to seek out a special tribe know as the Kajinowa. This long lost tribe has not been seen by anyone in over 70 years and is rumoured to be extinct, but Albert thought that he was the man to find them and prove their existence.

After a very long flight over and long hike, he finally made it to the mountain. Now where to start looking, what tracks were there to follow? Albert couldn't find anything and ended up walking around discontent, when all of a sudden a fork was hurled towards him. The impact knocked Albert to the floor and pinned him there. He was helpless and couldn't defend himself.

It was the Kajinowa people that had attacked him, they were still alive. The reason nobody had seen them for 70 years was because who ever saw them, was killed in a ritual sacrifice. Now Albert was in trouble, so he took a deep breath and thought about his martial arts training.

As soon as they lifted the fork out the ground, Albert jumped up and dived between their legs and ran for safety. He just about managed to get behind a tree before another fork was thrown his way. Albert managed to get back on the plane and fly home, wishing he had never gone there to help find the Kajinowa people.

 

[kallope]

42-365 Alberts Adventures in the last snow of the winter

IT SNOWED

After his ordeal yesterday, Albert came back to a white home! His cardboard heart filled with joy, the snow was back! Oh how he had missed it the last few weeks, but sadly this was not as thick as the previous snow.

With a sparkle in his eye Albert set out to enjoy that little snow that was around as he feared it was the last for the year. To start with he had snow ball fights with the neighbours, then made another snow man. To end, he made a self portrait in the now. After that, he went inside to warm up with a nice warm mug of chocolate and reflected on what a wonderful day of relaxing and playing in the snow he just had. Albert thought it didn't matter how old you were, snow could still make you feel like a kid again.

 

[klc_001]

Michael - I LOVE this series !!!

I have one of these little guys and now feel very very guilty for not giving DJ the attention he deserves - am off to remedy it right now - after subscribing to your thread, and looking Albert up on Facebook of course!

Well done - can't wait to see the rest as they're uncovered!

 

[kallope]

43-356 Alberts Adventures with smoke and mirrors

Day 43 in Albert's house.

Last night Albert was watching more magic shows trying to work out how to improve his own act. After a while he began to get board as they were only doing things he already knew how to do, so began to flick through the channels.

Just as he was about to give up, he came across this amazing trick of photos within photos and the same person in multiple places. He had to find out how to do it. The next day Albert phoned the magician up to find out the secret, but he was very reluctant to tell him. Albert kept him on the phone for most the day pleading to know, until he eventually wore the magician out and he told him.

Albert promised never to tell the secret and set it all up in his house. This was amazing, he now had a new closing act for his show that he was sure found send the public home thinking WOW.

 

[kallope]

44-365 Alberts Adventures in 3D

Today Albert went 3D

After hearing all the rave reviews of the Avatar in 3D, Albert decided that he had to see it. So he rang around to see if any friends would go with him, but sadly they had all already seen it and told him how good it was but wouldn't go see it again, so Albert had to go on his own.

When he got there, he couldn't believe the price of a ticket. If he went to see the film then he would have no money left over for his pick and mix, but he wasn't coming all this way not to see it, so had to go without pick and mix.

The evening progressed in this downward spiral for Albert as when he got in the cinema, there were only seats right at the back to sit. And due to his size, it was no easy task to climb steps, so Albert decided to grab onto ****'s trousers to get a lift to the top.

Once he finally made it up there, several people tried sitting on him, as they thought the seat was empty. Luckily for Albert though, the film started and people stopped moving. He really enjoyed the film by the end, but didn't think it worth all the hassle he had to go through to see it.

 

[kallope]

45-365 Alberts Adventures on valentines day

Love is in the air.

Today Albert woke up wondering if he would receive any valentine cards. It's been a long time since he had any romance in his life now and he is beginning to feel lonely, but he wasn't going to let this ruin his day.

After he had checked the post box and nothing was there, he decided to go shopping for some new stuff. When he got into town, all he could see was couples celebrating valentine's day. So Albert cut his day short and went home.

When he got home, he saw a familiar figure at the door. Could it be? Albert began to run, as he got closer he realised it was...... SALLY

Sally had returned to her love as she had missed him too much, and Albert's heart filled with joy. There was something different about her though..................

 

[kallope]

46-365 Alberts Adventure with Sallys Return

The grand reunion.

After his amazing end to the day, with Sally's return, Albert couldn't wait to get up today. To begin with he cooked her breakfast. This caused a few problems as when Albert went to get an egg, he couldn't grip onto it, and the egg kept slipping out him arms and smashing on the kitchen floor.

For the rest of the day, the pair caught up and Sally was explaining what all her new foreign tattoo's meant. Albert was lots in her massive brown Amazonian eyes, and was thinking back to when they first met. Back then he was shocked at her size, but after discovering her mother was Amazonian it all made sense.

They spent the evening sitting round the candle on a beach talking and reminiscing. Sally explained how she had seen his picture in the paper and the adventures he had been on, and realised that Albert had changed. This was the happiest Albert had been all year. He now wondered what adventures were heading their way

 

[sammyd56]

This thread is fantastic! Some brilliant photography too. Kudos!