HIMUPNORTH
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- Gary
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1. Smoking can shorten your penis by as much as a centimeter. Erections are all about good bloodflow, and lighting up calcifies blood vessels, stifling erectile circulation. So even if you dont care all that much about your lungs or dying young, spare the lil guy.
2. Doctors can now grow skin for burn victims using the foreskins of circumcised infants. One foreskin can produce 23,000 square meters, which would be enough to tarp every Major League infield with human flesh.
3. An enlarged prostate gland can cause both erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation. If you have an unexplained case of either, your doctors looking forward to checking your prostate. Even if youre not.
4. The average male orgasm lasts 6 seconds. Women get 23 seconds. Which means if women were really interested in equality, theyd make sure we have four orgasms for every one of theirs.
5. The oldest known species with a penis is a hard-shelled sea creature called Colymbosathon ecplecticos. Thats Greek for amazing swimmer with large penis. Which officially supplants Buck Naked as the best porn name, ever.
6. Circumcised foreskin can be reconstructed. Movable skin on the shaft of the penis is pulled toward the tip and set in place with tape. Later, doctors apply plastic rings, caps, and weights. Years can pass until complete coverage is attained. . . . Okay, well shut up now.
7. Only one man in 400 is flexible enough to give himself oral pleasure. Its estimated, however, that all 400 have given it their best shot at some point.
8. There are two types of penises. One kind expands and lengthens when becoming erect (a grower). The other appears big most of the time, but doesnt get much bigger after achieving erection (a shower).
9. An international Mens Health survey reports that 79 percent of men have growers, 21 percent have showers.
10. German researchers say the average intercourse lasts 2 minutes, 50 seconds, yet women perceive it as lasting 5 minutes, 30 seconds. Are we that good or that bad?
11. Turns out size does matter: The longer your penis, the better semen displacement youll achieve when having sex with a woman flush with competing sperm. Thats according to researchers at the State University of New York, who used artificial phalluses (ahem) to test the scooping mechanism of the peniss coronal ridge. Next up: curing cancer.
12. The penis thats been enjoyed by the most women could be that of King Fatefehi of Tonga, who supposedly deflowered 37,800 women between the years 1770 and 1784 thats about seven virgins a day. Go ahead, say it: Its good to be king.
13. Better-looking men may have stronger sperm. Spanish researchers showed women photos of guys who had good, average, and lousy sperm and told them to pick the handsomest men. The women chose the best sperm producers most often.
14. No brain is necessary for ejaculation. That order comes from the spinal cord. Finding a living vessel for said ejaculation, however, takes hours of careful thought and, often, considerable amounts of alcohol.
15. The most common cause of penile rupture: vigorous masturbation. Some risks are just worth taking.
2. Doctors can now grow skin for burn victims using the foreskins of circumcised infants. One foreskin can produce 23,000 square meters, which would be enough to tarp every Major League infield with human flesh.
3. An enlarged prostate gland can cause both erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation. If you have an unexplained case of either, your doctors looking forward to checking your prostate. Even if youre not.
4. The average male orgasm lasts 6 seconds. Women get 23 seconds. Which means if women were really interested in equality, theyd make sure we have four orgasms for every one of theirs.
5. The oldest known species with a penis is a hard-shelled sea creature called Colymbosathon ecplecticos. Thats Greek for amazing swimmer with large penis. Which officially supplants Buck Naked as the best porn name, ever.
6. Circumcised foreskin can be reconstructed. Movable skin on the shaft of the penis is pulled toward the tip and set in place with tape. Later, doctors apply plastic rings, caps, and weights. Years can pass until complete coverage is attained. . . . Okay, well shut up now.
7. Only one man in 400 is flexible enough to give himself oral pleasure. Its estimated, however, that all 400 have given it their best shot at some point.
8. There are two types of penises. One kind expands and lengthens when becoming erect (a grower). The other appears big most of the time, but doesnt get much bigger after achieving erection (a shower).
9. An international Mens Health survey reports that 79 percent of men have growers, 21 percent have showers.
10. German researchers say the average intercourse lasts 2 minutes, 50 seconds, yet women perceive it as lasting 5 minutes, 30 seconds. Are we that good or that bad?
11. Turns out size does matter: The longer your penis, the better semen displacement youll achieve when having sex with a woman flush with competing sperm. Thats according to researchers at the State University of New York, who used artificial phalluses (ahem) to test the scooping mechanism of the peniss coronal ridge. Next up: curing cancer.
12. The penis thats been enjoyed by the most women could be that of King Fatefehi of Tonga, who supposedly deflowered 37,800 women between the years 1770 and 1784 thats about seven virgins a day. Go ahead, say it: Its good to be king.
13. Better-looking men may have stronger sperm. Spanish researchers showed women photos of guys who had good, average, and lousy sperm and told them to pick the handsomest men. The women chose the best sperm producers most often.
14. No brain is necessary for ejaculation. That order comes from the spinal cord. Finding a living vessel for said ejaculation, however, takes hours of careful thought and, often, considerable amounts of alcohol.
15. The most common cause of penile rupture: vigorous masturbation. Some risks are just worth taking.
Don't let Min read this she have a field day.......
