a man joins a golf club and has his first lesson with the pro. He grabs his club and WALLOP!, the ball goes 50 yards. the pro says you are holding your club way too tight, hold it like you would your wifes breasts, gently but firmly, and swing again, WALLOP!, 250 yards!, fantastic the man shouts and runs off home to tell his wife the good news. After a while his wife thinks i would not mind joining a golf club, so off she goes down to the golf club. She has a lesson with the pro, grabs the club and WALLOP!, 50 yards, the pro says you are holding the club way to tight and rough, hold it like you would your husbands p*n*s, she does and WALLOP!, 15 yards, the pro says i am sure you would hit the ball further if you take the club out of your mouth!. 
