I've visited all the local clubs in my locale and they all suffer from many of the negative points raised here and weren't for me.
However, one group stood right out for me. I used to run night school classes on photography - from beginner to experienced beginner. Once the three courses were up, my final lesson had a "what next" component to it. What can you do if you enjoy photography and want to get better in a social, group environment. The obvious answer to that is "join a camera club". However another option I gave was to "start your own". Three groups tried this, and one has been going for 5 years now (the other two died with COVID). It's not geographically tied (but they are all relatively local), is very loosely organised, but importantly, is filled with like-minded people who all enjoy photography.
They decide on a theme every month. Come the end of the month, images are submitted, pasted into a powerpoint, and when they meet at the pub, the images are displayed. Feedback from everyone on each (anonymous) image is encouraged and everyone gets one vote. Winner is the person with the most votes and their prize is deciding next month's theme. Then they go round the group with the photographer owning up to their photo, talking about it briefly, and responding to the feedback. The rest of the time is spent chatting/socialising. It's very laid back, and those that don't want their photos critiquing, don't enter. They've had a couple of speakers as well as days/nights out taking photographs. The important thing, is that it works for them. What I noticed was that whilst people like to "win", no-one seems to care whether they do or not. For them, it's about improving their photography and getting/giving feedback in order to improve.
First, they have all quickly learned to develop a thick skin and respond to critical feedback without losing their s**t. A skill many people today would benefit from!
Second - in my opinion, they have all significantly improved as photographers. Some aren't interested in improving. They just enjoy it for the simple sake of what photography is. But it hasn't changed the fact that they have improved. About half of them are still on auto (and they don't care). There is a definite "split" between technical and creative skills and it's really good to see these skills rub off on others.
Third - it's fun, lively, entertaining and gets me (and them) out of the house.
I guess what I'm saying isn't that "clubs need to be like this", but if your local club is rubbish because of reasons, consider starting something that you think is worthwhile. All you need is half a dozen like minded folks and you're on your way. In today's social media climate, it shouldn't be that hard. These guys did it with no experience, and just "love" for the art. Which is, as I understand it, the literal translation of [French] amateur. Online groups are certainly helpful, but there's nothing quite like meeting in-person and having a pint with someone who has the same hobby as you.
Challenges on TP such as the 365s, 52s, & 12s, the zine exchange, the various POTYs, the nifty 50 etc are all versions of what you could do with a group if you so desired. Don't wait for the right thing to fall in your lap - make it happen.
[/tuppence]
Edit - Ben - I wasn't meaning "you" personally when I said "you". It was a general "you" as in "the dissatisfied with camera clubs reader"