i think you have much to learn about the difference between "nonsense" and fact.
"The flash placement doesn't allow you to get very close to your subject" - FACT
Yes, this is quite true, but if you use the mod I mentioned - cutting the extraneous 6" from the shaft - you can get quite close.
"Basically its a bounce umbrella that eats an extra stop of light with a diffusion panel you don't need" - FACT
You need to understand the difference between FACT and OPINION. I've use bounce brollies and the umbrella box and the diffusion panel DOES make a difference. It provides an EVEN light across the panel and allows much more control of fall-off.
"Then it has to traverse your flash head before hitting your subject, potentially causing darker spots if you're too close" - FACT
Yes, this is true, but it's a £20 softbox so there will be trade-offs.
sure you CAN modify it to do all kinds of things. you could cut holes in it, for more light. you can paint it for color or GOBO effects, you can even add velcro strips to act as a grid.
you CAN do all kinds of things to it. but that doesnt change any of the current FACTS.
you CAN drive a car with your feet if you want. doesnt make it a good idea.