Best type of self defence (kids and adults)

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cambsno

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I want to get my kids aged 10 and 8 to learn about self defence and learn skills they hopefully never use but are there if they need them. As they start to play out more and become more independent I want them to be able to get out of any difficult situations (as a protective father, especially my daughter). Lots of different martial arts out there, which would be the best one for this?
 
In my opinion, although i've never done any, I would suggest jujitsu.

With that, it's generally about controlling the attacker with holds and eventually putting them in a position where they need to submit.

Doesn't have to be physical, aggressive or bloody in any way

I'm sure others with various self defence skills, can guide you more though
 
IanD said:
In my opinion, although i've never done any, I would suggest jujitsu.

With that, it's generally about controlling the attacker with holds and eventually putting them in a position where they need to submit.

Doesn't have to be physical, aggressive or bloody in any way

I'm sure others with various self defence skills, can guide you more though
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I’m afraid that is rather out of date...

If you want to defend yourself the something along the lines of MMA is what you want, maximum controlled violence to put the attacker out of action as quickly as possible. And I say that as a totally non-violent person, I’ve never been in a fight and intend never to be but if I were, I would want to win by any means as quickly as possible.

If you want something to teach you discipline and a focus then Jujitsu or judo are very good. They are probably good for self defence against an average attacker (judo served me well in school) but if your primary aim is self defence then a lot of added fuss for not gain.

Edit, if you look on YouTube for jujitsu vs MMA you’ll see what I mean.
 
I practiced Karate for thirty five years and taught it for about twenty - I used to teach lots of kids at all three of the schools I had set up at the time (1970s and 1980s).

Karate is a great discipline for kids if they want to take it seriously, but given today's kids' attitudes they will not progress fast enough.

Before I eventually settled on seriously studying Karate, I trained in Aikido, Jujutsu (Jujitsu) and Judo. IMO any of these will suit youngsters better as they all involve grappling techniques and wrestling. Seeing as kids' fights always end up on the floor, it will be the most suitable in the short term.
 
Sprinting?
 
Hi Simon

I did Taekwon-Do (ITF) at 18 for a few years, and my son (now 8) started JuJitsu at 6.5 years old. I chose this for him for school situations where some bullying may occur where hopefully with this he will be able to get himself out of being held etc without having to hit people, but where locks, throws etc would make people think twice about doing it again etc. I thought about the other martial arts like I did, or boxing etc but I didn't want him getting into trouble hitting someone, and I thought he would not on that basis. Once he is a bit older I might get him to do boxing (if he wants) but I'll see - I think they might be a good combination, but I suspect he will have a ton of homework by then so we will see what time is available.

There is no-one martial art that is best in different situations, or suits individuals best. What any martial art gives you (or your children) is a degree of self confidence which I believe makes it less likely they will be attacked in the first place, and if that did happen they would be in a better place. As important is finding a club with a nice atmosphere where your children feel comfortable - some are more strict than others.

The above comment about running is a good one in my opinion, if feasible. Always best to avoid a fight if you can!
 
Kickboxing is a good one, most, not all but most will teach points fighting at lower level then into full contact, it’s fun and teaches then basics, belts and stuff to keep then interested, and obviously you learn to defend yourself along the way, my lads had no issues in school, knowing a lad is a black belt kind of keeps them away from the trouble/bullying. Mixed martial arts (MMA) is around and my oldest tried in after hitting black belt in kickboxing but hated it and to be honest so did I.

But it’s more about the club/instructors than the type to be honest, you need to find the right instructor that installs confidence yet pushes the no violence thing, you want then to know how to use it if backed into a corner but not use it to intimidate or even become bully/trouble makers themselves.
 
isn't it a Rambo knife in London?
 
Get them taught how to defend themselves rather than martial arts.
Points of the body to be targeted that immobilise rather than enrage.
Things that look good in films might hurt a bit, but you want to make time for escape.
For example eyes, fingers or objects rammed into them work well, attacker can't continue or follow when blinded.

Always tell my wife if you are ever confronted in the car by a road rage type person you are sitting in a formidable weapon, use it.
Mobile phone smashed into the adams apple also gives time for escape or the chance to damage other sensitive areas.

Too many watch action films or play computer games, just punching someone once will hurt your hand a lot.
 
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I'd go for judo/jujitsu to. Gives them a good grounding in wrestling and space management. If a child really needs to hurt someone, they aren't going to do it with their fists. If you have a boy then put in boxing a bit later. Boxing doesn't work so well for girls as they lack upper body strength compared to post-puberty boys.
 
Don't forget the much more important life lessons of not putting yourself in dangerous situations in the first place, and developing the awareness to spot when they could happen.

If it's martial arts you're after then I would think for this purpose they are all much the same. There are probably self-defense specific classes around these days. But as above, go for the eyes/balls/throat/fingers with something pointy and you're most of the way there.
 
Craigus said:
Don't forget the much more important life lessons of not putting yourself in dangerous situations in the first place, and developing the awareness to spot when they could happen.
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Exactly. That's what I meant in my post above. It might have looked flippant but after many years teaching karate and then many more teaching karate and tai chi, "Don't be there" was the best possible advice he (or anyone) could give.
 
Certainly no expert, or have any experience at all to be honest. But I would think anything based on one one one combat, restraining or getting an attacker to submit is of limited use these days.

Getting someone in a headlock and giving them the mother of all noggins isn't going to be much use when the rest of the gang can casually walk up and stab you.

The best thing I would of thought would to be able to run, and to know just enough to make an opening should you get cornered, and then run!
 
it is always best to avoid violence. for self preservation.
However most people taught marshal arts are taught to pull their punches. Pretty much only boxers learn to hit with full force.
unfortunately it you teach the reflex needed to pull punches, that is what you do in real action.
In a real fight you must disable as soon as possible, if you do not wish to be hurt yourself.
 
bass_junkie83 said:
Certainly no expert, or have any experience at all to be honest. But I would think anything based on one one one combat, restraining or getting an attacker to submit is of limited use these days.

Getting someone in a headlock and giving them the mother of all noggins isn't going to be much use when the rest of the gang can casually walk up and stab you.

The best thing I would of thought would to be able to run, and to know just enough to make an opening should you get cornered, and then run!
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If you start running from bullies then you'll be running forever.

I'd suggest boxing. it teaches discipline, improves strength and reactions and gives confidence, making the person less likely to be bullied in the first place, and if someone does try to bully them, then they'll know how to throw a punch back. Times have changed, but growing up on a rough council estate in the 70s and 80s, I was taught that if you knock someone down, then make sure they don't get up in a hurry as they'll jump straight back on you if they do. Probably can't get away with that sort of thing now. but it proved a valuable lesson to me back then.
 
I think you need to decide is this is for you, or for the kids, and which situations you are thinking of, as I think the advice differs based on that.

My dad boxed, I did TaeKwon-do (nowhere near black belt), my 8 year does JuJitsu as above - for my son I still think it's the right choice over the others. I want him to be able to get out of one on one situations, gain confidence and defend himself without needing to hurt his most likely attacker, another child of a similar age. He should at this rate get his blackbelt not long after starting secondary school which I think will help perception wise for him. When he is older and more mature I will think about boxing or maybe some other ones.

As an adult you can argue things like Krav Maga are best, or MMA, but again it depends how far you would go personally defending yourself, and what your motivation for doing something is. Personally Taekwon-do was enough for me - a Thai Boxer or Krav Maga may well of destroyed me, but how likely was I to face one? I just wanted a bit more confidence, I got it, and that did the trick for me. Everyone is different - just pick something you feel comfortable with and get your kids the streetwise advice they need. Confidence and a bit of know how will go a longway - if you get attacked by a gang with knifes you are basically in trouble no matter what so it's not really something I concern myself with other than doing my best to avoid such situations.
 
Mumbles said:
If you start running from bullies then you'll be running forever.

I'd suggest boxing. it teaches discipline, improves strength and reactions and gives confidence, making the person less likely to be bullied in the first place, and if someone does try to bully them, then they'll know how to throw a punch back. Times have changed, but growing up on a rough council estate in the 70s and 80s, I was taught that if you knock someone down, then make sure they don't get up in a hurry as they'll jump straight back on you if they do. Probably can't get away with that sort of thing now. but it proved a valuable lesson to me back then.
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I would be much more worried about a child of mine being surrounded and corned coming off a train by a gang of armed youths after their phone which seems to be increasingly common these days.
The lone tough kid in school who's mummy didn't love them enough is no longer the biggest threat.
 
bass_junkie83 said:
I would be much more worried about a child of mine being surrounded and corned coming off a train by a gang of armed youths after their phone which seems to be increasingly common these days.
The lone tough kid in school who's mummy didn't love them enough is no longer the biggest threat.
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In a situation like that then neither running or fighting would be an option, just hand over the phone and hope for the best. My instinct would still be to go for the biggest one as hard as I could, but I appreciate the world now isn't the one I grew up in.
 
I did Karate for many years (a long time ago now). One of the black belts at the club was ex SAS, and he used to do a 30-60 minute session once a week on general self defence. His base line was "get out before it starts" which saved me on one occasion. The next step was all about a single strike that would disable an attacker. Places like the throat, groin, eye, knee, elbow - stop them from being able to function. He also taught basic locks like the thumb and wrist locks.

Not sure where you would learn something like this now, although Aikido haas always interested me, that's all about using your attackers balance and motion to your advantage.

But his mantra was always "get out before it starts" and that's such a good thing to learn, although I do appreciate that things can kick off really quickly these days.
 
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akr said:
I think you need to decide is this is for you, or for the kids, and which situations you are thinking of, as I think the advice differs based on that.

My dad boxed, I did TaeKwon-do (nowhere near black belt), my 8 year does JuJitsu as above - for my son I still think it's the right choice over the others. I want him to be able to get out of one on one situations, gain confidence and defend himself without needing to hurt his most likely attacker, another child of a similar age. He should at this rate get his blackbelt not long after starting secondary school which I think will help perception wise for him. When he is older and more mature I will think about boxing or maybe some other ones.

As an adult you can argue things like Krav Maga are best, or MMA, but again it depends how far you would go personally defending yourself, and what your motivation for doing something is. Personally Taekwon-do was enough for me - a Thai Boxer or Krav Maga may well of destroyed me, but how likely was I to face one? I just wanted a bit more confidence, I got it, and that did the trick for me. Everyone is different - just pick something you feel comfortable with and get your kids the streetwise advice they need. Confidence and a bit of know how will go a longway - if you get attacked by a gang with knifes you are basically in trouble no matter what so it's not really something I concern myself with other than doing my best to avoid such situations.
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Thanks all.

To answer this question directly, It's probably over protectiveness and it really does relate more to my daughter but I just want her to be able to defend herself should she be in a difficult situation and needs a way out. Highly unlikely that its should ever be needed but if she is in a threating situation (thinking more 1 on 1 rather than facing a gang) then she can hopefully do something about it.
 
The first point is just being aware and spotting any danger from miles around. I don't think any martial arts will help you against acid attack (well its just the 40p bleach in most case, but that doesn't make it any less dangerous) or a machine gun or a machete. The second point is to evacuate and not enter dangerous areas. London is certainly one, but not the only one. Tenerife looks like a bloody good place to live now with none of that winter misery.
 
As someone who did an early form of MMA (before it became mainstream), it can help with confidence and discipline. But I agree that being sensible and using your head is more valuable. Don't go down a dark alley at night alone. Be aware of your surroundings. If someone wants your phone, throw it so they have to move away from you to get it. These things are just as important as being able to fight when you need to.

I've been in a few fights as a teenager, a few times at school and twice out on the street. At school, I did enough to dissuade the other kid from trying to attack me again. Out on the street, it was to put them down long enough that I could run away.

It's been over 15 years since I've trained martial arts so I'm going to be useless these days.
 
jerry12953 said:
As my Tai Chi teacher says -

"Just don't be there......."
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Meanwhile, mine loves to get the pads out for elbow strikes :)

But you're absolutely right - my plan is always to run. Anything else is gaining time for running on the offchance that they are faster than me ;)
 
Personally I train in Krav Maga for the exact reasons of it being a practical system based on instinctive reflexes.

The main advice is to not get in a fight though. They hurt and are mostly pointless.
 
The advice to avoid getting into a situation in the first place is sound. Secondly finding an excellent instructor is so important. I’ve done karate and judo but the most valuable advice I have is avoidance in the first place. My son was bullied at school a few years ago and via one of his “mates” joined an MMA class. I was concerned about the techniques he was shown and established that the guy teaching was not registered. And really was just a big bloke who thought he knew what he was doing.

I have two daughters that I showed various techniques to and what to be aware of to avoid confrontation. It worked for them, gave them confidence and they always managed to de escalate situations, usually be removing themselves. My son had the confidence and muscle but this led him to “step in” when friends were in trouble during a night out. Four lads jumped on him and beat him up. He’s ok but learnt a real lesson that I’d rather he’d walked away from and so did he.
 
tijuana taxi said:
Get them taught how to defend themselves rather than martial arts.
Points of the body to be targeted that immobilise rather than enrage.
Things that look good in films might hurt a bit, but you want to make time for escape.
For example eyes, fingers or objects rammed into them work well, attacker can't continue or follow when blinded.

Always tell my wife if you are ever confronted in the car by a road rage type person you are sitting in a formidable weapon, use it.
Mobile phone smashed into the adams apple also gives time for escape or the chance to damage other sensitive areas.

Too many watch action films or play computer games, just punching someone once will hurt your hand a lot.
Click to expand...

Martial arts is not only about learning to defend yourself by using unarmed combat, or if you want to talk Hollywood, Martial arts is not limited to learning how to do a karate chop to the back of someone's neck.

Martial arts can involve other things aside from unarmed combat, such as discipline and respect to others, for example learning about listening to the teacher and not to talk back. Something that could help build up confident in yourself to complete tasks, useful for independent living.
 
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jerry12953 said:
Exactly. That's what I meant in my post above. It might have looked flippant but after many years teaching karate and then many more teaching karate and tai chi, "Don't be there" was the best possible advice he (or anyone) could give.
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And the next best advice is learn to run ............ bloody fast !
 
Post #5.
 
I learned a variety of sport based martial arts. Originally boxing and wrestling and later Judo and Karate.

Never had to use any of the techniques learned in anger but the self confidence and a grneral ease in difficult moments, temper control, stance etc meant using dhat was learned stayed in the gym.

I still practice even in my early 60s but we live in an ever evolving time of random violence.

My grand children train in boxing as a sport and Judo/MMA for potential self defence.

Confidence is about not getting involved as the use of bladed weapons is not limited to city streets. There has been knife threats in many small towns/villages in the South West.

Any training in martial arts (which includes Boxing) should build confidence and awareness - including exiting a dangerous situation.
 
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